Itsy Bitsy

Yes, the title was meant to say that. This movie is hokey, cheesy, unoriginal and kinda dumb. But, I was entertained and watched the entire film...and didn't get bored. That says something right?

The story is almost storybook ripoff of Arachnophobia but without the comedic element. And there's really only one spider, I think, except babies and disgusting egg sacks. Instead, they introduce a spider who's supposed to be an ancient deity. Again kinda dumb. With all this power and its ability to survive for millennia, it's pretty cool this one lady gives it a run for its money.

Acting is not anything to write home about and the dialogue was stupid. I wish I felt the makers didn't take making this so seriously. But I'm pretty sure they did.

That being said, if you're good with a mindless film you don't care to think about afterwards (except that the mom from Pet Sematary was in it), then give it a shot.

Let me start by saying that, based on the trailer and poster, I kind of thought this would be more of a tongue in cheek, icky spider killing romp. Instead, Itsy Bitsy feels like a spider slasher flick with a whole lot of family drama instead of teens scared in the woods. While it has its moments, the film suffers from simply not enough slashing. There's hints, glimpses, quick cuts, and teases, but there just isn't enough spider slashing happening here. The audience knows what is eventually coming, and that's largely why we're watching: we want to see this gross, huge spider poison and spider web cocoon people to death!

Unfortunately it's a bit of a slog sitting through the family drama that makes up a large portion of the film (almost all of it). That and the ancient mythology behind the spider's existence just feels boring. Itsy Bitsy is well made with decent performances. But when you see a giant spider in act one, you're really just waiting to see it go off in act three. And instead of a bang, Itsy Bitsy just shoots blanks.

ITSY BITSY begins with a tribal ritual, where a black, earthen jar / container is stolen by desperate men. The scene shifts to a mother (Elizabeth Roberts) and her two kids relocating to her new job in a new town. She will be providing in-home care for an elderly collector of tribal artifacts (Bruce Davison- WILLARD), who just happens to have received said container.

As more is learned about the sacred pottery, it becomes clear that something terrible is brewing. When it is broken, the horror is unleashed.

Two things can be said up front: #1- Arachnophobes will utterly hate this movie! #2- Monster / practical effects fans will absolutely love it!

The complaints about the "family drama" aspect of the movie are unfounded. Any such drama is just a necessary part of the overall story, unless we only want a pointless series of jump scares. The movie also has its own mythology, explaining the significance of the creature. A solid monster movie with some creepy moments.

Denise Crosby co-stars as Sheriff Jane Dunne...

Not a lot happens until the end. I liked the buildup with Jesse and Walter but I was disappointed to see that end so soon. The mother and daughter are so unlikable. Jesse (who is played by Arman Darbo) should've been the main focus who had to deal with these awful characters the whole time.

Also, the ending was confusing and nothing prior to it was even explained.

Almost decent watch, don't want to watch this again, and can only recommend for a Bad Movie Night.

They got some decent actors (even the kids), they had some acceptable production value, but I was still surprised to see this was a 2019 movie, it looks closer to 2010.

The real shame is that once it starts to horror movie, it actually does a good job. There are clearly things from Jaws and Alien, maybe even The Thing, sprinkled in this, so at least the people involved are legitimate horror people. All the establishing story, and the B-plot involving everyone outside the 2 houses is just a waste. None of it pays off.

I get that they were trying to do what Arachnophobia did, but that had a point to it.

We came here to see a spider hunt people, just give us that.