Coven

What this is, is a supernatural fantasy with softcore porn mixed in. And it sucks. I have no idea of to whom is this made for? Teenage boys in the 90's before internet? Obviously this is a rip off of an another supernatural fantasy movie made for teen boys way back and way better. There is no reason for anybody to watch this horrible movie. It is very bad and would of been bad even in the early 90's when it at least would of filled some purpose for the teen boys.

Sounds are bad, acting is bad, special effects are bad, casting is bad (the teachers seem younger then the students) and the story is bad.

This movie is so sapphic, yet cheap, that you'd think it was written by Sappho herself as interpreted by Roger Corman. Yes, the leads are hot, and they have *gasp* boobies - with those boobies being highlighted/displayed enough to keep Corman himself happy, but they couldn't frickin' act their way out of a wet paper bag.

That being said, it's also written really badly. Neither the story nor the dialogue work at all, and it probably wouldn't even pass muster in a CW show. Not even Riverdale. I'm only halfway through as I'm typing this and if it wasn't for the fact that I'm doing other stuff, I'd have turned this off about 30 minutes ago.

Still watching it and OMG this was an actual dialogue exchange: A: "She killed another girl and you still brought me to her?" (referencing a scene early in the movie where the antagonist literally stabbed someone to death) B: "I thought it was an accident!" What the actual...?

Welp, it just ended and yeah, it's as bad as I thought.

It only got 2 stars because of the boobies. If they weren't there, it'd be a zero. What can I say? I'm easily distracted!

Ok, this is one of those teeny-bopper horror movies where everyone is pretty (including the guys). Wait, there is one dumb sexist hillbilly who the witches have to put in his place. Big surprise. Coven doesn't even pretend to be a ripoff of another famous young girl coven movie, it says so right on the cover!

Ok, you've got you're two catty lesbian witches that are always threatening to kiss, but never do, there's the real goofy witch, the peacenik witch, and the "new" witch who just wants to see her mother again. An accidental(?) sacrifice, a newfound "key" witch, whose most prevalent power seems to be the opening and closing of doors, and several various ceremonies later, the girls manage to summon the spirit of Ashura, who is supposed to bring great power to the coven. Only she just wants to kill everyone else, and funnily enough, make catty remarks. How old was this witch?

As you can see, not much of a story here. Could not for the life of me figure out why the non-possessed catty lesbian witch was arrested at the end. For being a bystander? For getting hit in the face with a lug nut wrench? For a bad attitude? What could they charge her with? They're going to explain a satanic ritual, an unholy battle, and a possession... to the police? Yeah, book this chick! Made zero sense.

After some 20 dreary minutes I could't help pushing the FF-button, to see if somewhere along the line there would pop up something remotely interesting (let alone scary), but it turned out as still more of the same silly, uneventful rip-off of any other B-movie that concerns young college girls doing witchcraft. Ridiculous story, bad dialogues, cringing acting, hopeless lighting, sound and special effects: everything oozed amateurism and low (if any) budget.

Because of the lack of a decent plot or script, the director thought of bringing in as much skin as possible, so he made his actresses do their witching in an endless variation of cheap looking lingerie, which turned out anything but sexy or titillating, just preposterous.

Don't let the brazenly misleading synopsis fool you: pass this one, it's a waste of time.

Killing off the best looking witch in the first 10 mins pretty much bummed me out for the rest of it. Might be enjoyable by a few lesbians.