Cheaper by the Dozen

This was horrendous. And Walt must be spinning in his grave with this one. There have to some creative minds that Disney can hire. I honestly don't understand the lack of creativity.

Unfortunately... rather bad.

'Cheaper by the Dozen' undoubtedly has its heart in the right place but what a mess of an execution, they basically come up with as many messages as possible and cram them together - but there's one problem, they forgot the glue! It's just a sequence of points, as it culminates with a woeful, forced family drama.

The cast make it slightly more watchable than it would've otherwise been, I will say that - they aren't great, but are predominantly hindered by the lame dialogue and yawnful character development. Zach Braff and Gabrielle Union are a solid pairing, while Mykal-Michelle Harris and Leo A. Perry are the pick of the younger lot - I would've liked to have seen more of their characters, as those two definitely had the best comedic timing of the kids. Others I note: 'Talking Dead' favourite Ron Funches and 'White Chicks' alum Brittany Daniel.

The only hero from this 2022 flick? Larry Sims. That dude went ham on Union's hair - I've never noticed a character go through so many hairstyles before! Hope he got paid enough.

I feel a tiny bit bad for disliking something that tries to come out meaningful, but man this is a cringefest. If you want a film adaptation of the 1948 novel, I'd recommend the 2003 remake with Steve Martin.

If you're old enough to remember the book and the original Disney film, then you'll be well aware of the glue that is strong enough to hold a family with 12 kids together - unconditional love for the family. When push comes to shove, the Baker clan has always known that family comes first.

This updated version sets its tone immediately with a mini-documentary that establishes where all their many kids came from, and in this case it is in many ways. There was a divorce on both sides of the relationship, an adoption, bi-racial kids from the new marriage and of course a nephew that quickly enters the picture to round out a total of 9+1 children.. That's the way they have chosen to interpret a dozen this time around, 12 bakers. You have your black kids, your wheel-chair bound child, your Indian represented child and the white kids and the bi-racial kids that came from the new marriage. If you're getting the feeling that this might be motivated to create a sense of token diversity you might be encouraged to feel that way by the political content of the film. The Baker's home features BLM signs and their dogs are named Joe Biten and Bark Obama (not sure if that's a compliment or an insult). Many opportunities are taken in dialogue to feature political ideologies including micro-aggressions, victim shaming and profiling. There are even some painful moments where the white cast are lectured about inequality and how they naturally fit in everywhere they go because they're white while black people are profiled, ostracized, discriminated against and generally lose opportunities because of generational wealth. White people are told that they can never understand what that is like and that their accomplishments are invalidated.

The writers handle this in some creative ways, and the responses are thought provoking. A contradiction is present, for example, when their white nephew is profiled because of his past behaviour and he was bullied and felt like a misfit, but the answer is found in the Baker's #1 rule - family comes first.

Not all of the scenarios outlined make sense but on the whole it is a sweet story of a family fighting to be genuine and the gist of the plot remains the same as previous films, albeit with some changes to the characters. But too many faces quickly disappear into the background while posing some unanswered questions along the way. There are two sets of twins, contributing to the feeling that the children all blend together. It never truly feels like a full house. This is where the film struggles to stay coherent. There are many characters that fail to be distinct, and several agendas that don't support the plot, all contributing to the feeling that this film was rushed while never connecting well with the traditional family audience that typically supported this kind of a family comedy/drama.

This was one of the most eye-rolling experiences anyone could have watching a movie. From the moment this film begins it sets its low bar with a long expositional scene that shows the cringe-inducing Disney Channel quality that will follow. It pretentiously tries to be funny while at the same time trying to appeal to the younger audience of this generation leading to a film that feels like catering without style or substance. This was obviously not going to be a film that should be taken seriously, but considering the intended audience this film tries to appeal to, it should have had some sense of self-respect. The look of the film feels cheap and lazy. There were many points in this film that felt embarrassing to watch, especially because of how much it tries to throw at the screen in hopes that it will somewhat entertain anyone who bothers to watch it. It's a shame that throughout this entire film there wasn't an ounce of effort to tell a compelling story of any kind, leading to a film that tries too hard and morbidly fails in every aspect.

Interesting story with starting right in the family life together instead of how the parents met. Liked the story about trying to promote their family restaurant. This movie has none of the charm of the movies before it. As a comedy this movie falls flat, with very little laughs.