- Ashley Stubbs: I'm resetting your annoyance levels and doubling your tolerances for Phil. So, Mitchy the Kid, you should be good to go.
- Mitch Robbins: Thank you, other Hemsworth brother.
- Ashley Stubbs: [inputs "FACE SLAP" command, causing Mitch to slap himself in the face] Never gets old.
- Clementine Pennyfeather: You guys are cute.
- Mitch Robbins: Hi, I'm Mitch.
- Clementine Pennyfeather: I'm Clementine. Not much of a rind on you. I'll give you a discount.
- Mitch Robbins: How much?
- Clementine Pennyfeather: It's five dollars for an hour. It's four if you bathe first.
- Mitch Robbins: Does it have to be an hour all at once? Can it spread out over, like, a month? Or two?
- Clementine Pennyfeather: We'll work something out.
- Mitch Robbins: Oh good! Okay!
- Ashley Stubbs: Do you know where you are?
- Mitch Robbins: Uh, the waiting room of the CIA? Or the waiting room at CAA? This place has less privacy than Trump Tower.
- Phil Berquist: What is the One Thing?
- Mitch Robbins: The One Thing is this!
- [pulls out a revolver and shoots Phil]
- Ashley Stubbs: Freeze all motor functions!
- [both Mitch and Phil freeze for a couple seconds]
- Phil Berquist: So the secret of life is shooting me?
- Phil Berquist: Why is everybody naked?
- Clementine Pennyfeather: 'Cause all the hosts are naked. Why aren't you guys naked?
- Mitch Robbins: Um, because it's in HD.
- Phil Berquist: Moobs.