Angry Neighbors

I actually BOUGHT this stinkeroo. Mostly for Mr. Langella, who pulled off a great job despite an absolutely abysmal script. Sadly, it had such promise that I watched from beginning to end, so I have twice earned the right to declare... this movie SUCKS!!!

Worst. Story. Ever.

In fact, I don't think this film presented a story. Or a point. Or anything funny at all.

Anyway, this one is about a guy with a talking dog who might be pissed off at his neighbor, who you will never see, while a woman sometimes swims nude without being nude outside his "island" home. All for various unexplained reasons. That's about it. PEE-YEW!

It's a beautiful flop though, which means the crew is awesome. I already said the players are awesome. So, this can only be a failure of artistic vision and leadership! Top rot!

Sheesh! How do you go wrong with Frank Langella????

PS - Mr. Langella, I hope you were well paid, sir. We don't blame you!

I'm not sure this even counts as a movie. It seems more like someone fed boomer prompts into an AI chat bot and it spit out this whole movie. Like not even the script but the entire movie itself was just created and made inside the machine then pushed out slowly.

Nothing is funny or interesting. There's a talking dog for some reason that adds nothing, and is voiced by Cheech. The human can hear the dogs thoughts but for some reason has to reply to the dog audibly with dialogue. This is never addressed or explained.

The jokes are also not funny. Half the time there don't even seem to be any happening anyway - but the ones that are there are the most typical and dated old people comedy you can imagine. "I don't like loud things" is about 1/4 of the punch lines so if you chuckled at that - this may be the movie for you...

This is a weird one. I wasn't sure what to expect. I figured it would be two guys going at each other over the fence-line...and let the antics ensue! Nope, nothing like that.

I think this movie would be better enjoyed as a book. But I would never read it, because I dont read books...unless its a book on how to operate or fix something! I'm not the guy in his easy chair, snuggled up to a good book...clock ticking in an otherwise silent house with an animal on my lap...

What's weird about this flick is it is written by the mind of a child in it's nature, yet is deeply metaphorical. You have to get past the simplicity and stupidity of some of the characters and the story-line to get the point. The one hook in the story that keeps you wondering "WTH is he doing that for?", turns out to be a disappointing end, but made a very good point. You also have to get past what appears to be a talking dog...it's really not, but you have to use your head to get what I mean. The dog is not literally talking.

I would not call this a comedy, more like a "smirkedy". I didn't have a single "laugh out loud", but it kept my wife awake through most of it, which is a feat in itself! Probably because this move really leaves you wanting something to happen, and when it finally does, it's like, "really, what child thought that one up?"

Harry March (Frank Langella) is a world-weary writer who lives alone on an island in the Hamptons. He named it Noman in hopes that one day, he could answer a question with, "No Man is an island." He never does. His nemesis is his neighbor Lapham who is building his mega mansion and publishing his self-important, greed-is-good sayings. His only companion is his dog Hector (Cheech Marin) who speaks to him. Of course, he's the only one who can hear it. He has chased away his wife Chloe (Stockard Channing) and family. Kevin (Bobby Cannavale) leads a work crew with the Lapham construction. Kathy Polite (Katie Parker) is the real estate agent pushing for Harry to sell his island.

This is trying to be outlandish at times, but those are hit and miss. I thought the outdoor air conditioner is really stupid and then it comes back in the climax. I don't know why he's searching for horse hair and then it explains it without satisfaction. It's really borderline all the way to the end. I get the attempt at surreal humor. I don't think it's good enough.

This movie made me laugh a total of zero times. One of the worst movies I've ever seen. If you want to waste your time and be completely bored than by all means watch this movie.

P. S. There is nothing to spoil about this movie.

I literally wrote this review while I was watching the film because I was so bored.

The plot is stupid, the comedy is the worst, and I really don't get why anyone would give this film a good rating. I would rather watch paint dry.

Also, I really don't get the dog and the man's relationship and communication through the entire film. Just another aspect of the film that detracts from the already horrible plot and acting. If the dog wasn't in the movie there wouldn't even be a movie, because this film lacks that much content.