The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare

This movie was kind of what I expected it to be. As of recently guy Ritchie has had a habit of frequently pumping out mediocore action films. But this one takes the cake. There were good elements. Henry Cavill was really good and without a doubt carried this movie.

And he worked really well with his co-actors, most of who were extremely unremarkable. This movie also gives us what is probably the worst Churchill preformance ever. It was kinda predictable but at the same time its "based" on a true story. But my god it was horribly written. When Churchill said "what are you, some sort of ministry of ungentlemanly warfare" I felt my last brain cells die. 6.3/10.

It's the true WWII story of Operation Postmaster. This Guy Ritchie movie is most definitely highly fictionalized. It's 1942. Britain is in its darkest hour. The Blitz is destroying London. U-boats are cutting off the Atlantic supply route. America remains on the sidelines. The Nazis' main U-boat supply ship is located in a neutral Spanish colonial west African port. British parliament refuses to attack a neutral country. Winston Churchill secretly orders the unauthorized mission led by imprisoned soldier Gus March-Phillips (Henry Cavill) with his motley crew of outsiders.

This is one of those real fake history movies. It's more than the normal fictionalization. It's got the wild sardonic Guy Ritchie humor. These characters are rather one dimensional with a few exceptions. It feels more like a comic book movie although that's fine since that's the intention. A highlight is the insanely gorgeous Eiza González. Alan Ritchson and his giant muscles seem to be popping up everywhere. I like this, but I don't love it.

It's basically the same premise as Tarantino's movie - get a cast of outcasts and go and mow through hordes of nazis.

Where Tarantino's version had some nuance, and bad guys actually had some sort of personality, motivation, and charm, here it feels like a Call of Duty game, where NPCs are just standing there, waiting to be shot by the main character.

The only redeeming qualities are - it's apparently based on a true story, the cast is good, and it's a technically competent execution.

If you need a mindless action movie - you might enjoy it, but it's far from the best work of Guy Ritchie, and quite honestly - sad to see the bar has fallen so low for him.

Some good performances and a good story but it's let down by poor pacing and an almost complete lack of flair. It's feels like an 'action movie by numbers'. It doesn't have the charm of Kelly's Heroes, the dignity of The Guns of Navarone, the credibility of The Longest Day or the sheer star power and likeability of The Great Escape. If you're bored and want to watch Alan Ritchson play a Scandinavian Jack Reacher going on a nazi killing spree with the help of some friends then you might enjoy it. The fact that it's based on true events doesn't make it feel any more believable than any number of b-movie war films. It *could* have been great but it's a misfire. Perhaps a director who approached the subject more seriously would have had more success. Guy Ritchie seemed torn between doing a 'proper' war movie and doing his usual stylish blokey silliness, and the result is that this is neither.

The absolute worst thing about it is Rory Kinear who is horribly miscast as Winston Churchill. He's shocking. He looks nothing like him, despite mountains of prosthetics and he sounds like a northern comic doing a bad impression.

And it honestly should have been. With this nice ensemble and decent budget, great production design, and a director who in theory definitely should have the chops, THE MINISTRY OF UNGENTLEMANLY WARFARE had everything it needed and more.

And yet, it misses the mark. Much of it has to do with the direction, I'm afraid. A lack of spirit and inspiration can be felt throughout the film, sometimes worse than other times, but neither the shots he called nor his direction of the actors are worthy of Ritchie's potential. The script could have used a bit more polishing, especially concerning the dialogue, but it's really mostly the practical aspects where this falls flat.

If you're a native German speaker, you will also notice how bad the fake Germans actually are. They should have been dubbed, but nobody seemed to care. Even Til Schweiger messed up some lines in German (probably drunk on set, as usual) - nobody cared.

What also made the film worse than it could have been is the score. Someone told the composer to go for "Schifrin meets Morricone", I guess, and what he delivered was a weak attempt at copying both. No swing, no drama, no feeling whatsoever. Just flat and boring, matching the direction perfectly.

That being said, you can still kill a bit of time watching this, since Cavill, Ritchson, et al are very likeable and have a lot of charming presence. Locations are nice, the DoP did a great job with the lighting, and Eiza González has a great singing performance (refreshingly with no audible pitch correction, but as a professional singer with an amazing voice she really doesn't need any), even though the arrangement and interpretation of the famous "Mack The Knife" is quite horrible.

But if anything, this has made me wish for a more silly WW2 comedy with Cary Elwes in the lead. I'd buy that for a dollar.