Mercenaries

Mercenaries (2014) is the kind of movie that is quite honest with people who watch it. It doesn't pretend to be more than what should be.

The plot is paper thin. Very basic, probably made by monkeys.

Character A gets kidnapped by bad guys. Character B recruits some criminals by offering them redemption. The girls go to war and there will be death and destruction.

Blood squibs, horrible CGI, laughable acting, Vivica Fox is fatty, Brigitte Nielsen is over the top, handguns have 50 bullets without even reloading, bad guys are retarded and dumb by missing shots when their enemies are only 3 feet away from them.

The last fight was so cheesy and probably it was meant to be that way. Fortunately, it's short ( 84 minutes ) and it's OK to watch if you have nothing better to do.

When the president's daughter is kidnapped by a female warlord (Brigitte Nielsen) in a former Soviet republic, a CIA agent (Cynthia Rothrock) decides to send 4 dangerous female criminals to the rescue: Clay (Zoë Bell), Kat (Kristanna Loken), Raven (Vivica A. Fox) and Mei-Lin (Nicole Bilderback). I'm not sure if that is the standard procedure, but it has to work as time is running out...

This is an Asylum production, directed by Christopher Ray ('2 Headed Shark Attack'). From these credits, you don't expect too much, but the basic idea works: similar to Stallone's 'Expendables', they take a team of outcasts for a dangerous mission, but this time, it's female. The presence of Nielsen and Rothrock reminds you that a female action hero is nothing new, but a whole team of them guarantees some fun, even if the production value in general is very low - the rare case of a mock-buster that's actually adding something new.

"We're not nice women. We're not going on some fun adventure. We're going to do some very bad things to some very bad people." Ulrika (Nielsen) has just taken the President's daughter captive and is demanding for the US to recognize her as a Head of State or she will kill the daughter. The government has only one option, they must send in a team of mercenaries to rescue her. A team of women is picked and the mayhem begins. There isn't really a whole lot to say about this movie. This is an Expendables with women. That really tells you all you need to know. The dialog is cheesy and the acting isn't that good. The action sequences are OK but generic...like I said another version of Expendables. The movie was entertaining enough and I did stay with it and wasn't too bored but that's about all I have to say. Overall, a female version of The Expendables with roughly the same acting, dialog and plot. I give this a C+.

Man, online sit at home critics are just dogging on this film. Guys, keep in mind it's a low budgeter. People in general don't understand all the work that goes into making a film not processed by Hollywood big wig studios. Sure there was some lackluster acting and a few playing it straight forward. I've been on set of some low budget films. I have to say this one was decent. I only got bored in the beginning during the typical intro of each character. That has been done over so many times. (Vin Diesel - XXX) none the less, when the action gets rolling, it's not so terrible. I noticed people trashing the fight sequences. I can't speak for any others but I thought Zoe Bell looked great pulling them off as a harsh judge of screen action who came from a martial arts background myself.

I have to say that Nicole Bilderback is underrated and underused in this film. She is an actual kick-boxer who never once gets to showcase any of her real skills. She actually stills every scene she is in though it seems the only curse word she knows is "bitch". Lol. Asylum has come a long way from the mock busters they were known for back in the day. I think this film was a good cheesy action ride. Give it a chance.

I could rant about things like the uninspired washed out actresses and bad FX but even with a good cast and better FX it would stay an horrible movie. Made and sold on being an "Expendables" with women but not even close and probably done for 1/25th of an Expendables movie's budget. It's a mock buster with absolutely no plot (the little there is, is taken from Escape from New York), no reason nor sense. The team actions and decisions have no logic. It's an action movie without action and it's it worst crime. It's not even funny-bad, there is long stretches of boring and useless scenes for padding between boring talks (TALKS !!!) where nothing happen. save 90 MN of your lives and please watch something else. It's bad even by The Asylum sub-standards.