Garbo: Where Did You Go?

Garbo: Where Did You Go? Should have been titled Garbo: Where Did the Point Go?

This documentary somehow takes one of the most enigmatic stars of Hollywood's Golden Age and turns her into a dull, meandering mystery with no payoff. It spends nearly an hour trudging through her childhood and early life with barely any coverage of her actual years as a global icon. The decision to use a paper mâché mask on a stand-in Garbo (who looked more like the Jigsaw puppet than the Swedish Sphinx) was mind boggling. Even worse were the bizarre gum-chewing interludes from a blonde woman whispering like she was filming an ASMR video in a Brooklyn loft. When the film finally addresses her retirement in the last 20 minutes, it offers no real insight...just the same tired refrain that she didn't want to be famous anymore.

No notable talking heads, no revelatory commentary, and no reason to watch. After suffering for almost an hour, I fast-forwarded just to get to the part that was supposed to matter-and even that was a letdown. A true waste of time.

And no, this review doesn't contain spoilers. Greta Garbo died when I was a year and a half old. If that's a spoiler, I'd like to speak to your history teacher.

A few interesting facts and movie clips.

The documentary basically focused on everything we already know about Garbo and did little to delve into the deeper mystique of the woman and give us insight into the Garbo that was out of circulation for 50 years. Additionally, I found these things problematic:

-- The "voice of Greta" reading her letters sounded like a character out of Downton Abbey rather than a shy Swede.... totally misses that low husky sound.

-- There is a woman with a mask that keeps appearing in the film --- with the mask hiding her and then at times giving a glimpse of the real life. I suppose there is symbolism there with the real Garbo hiding from the public... but the mask is so creepy and so distracting, that I had to quit watching and just listen.

-- The actress billed as "the investigator" consistently interrupts at inopportune moments and is perhaps more distracting than the creepy mask.

Overall, not well-produced and a big let down. Don't invest the 90 minutes. You could tune into a TCM Garbo movie and hear a Ben Mankiewicz pre-film summary that would give you the same level of information (and you could actually watch him and not be creeped out).

It starts off with a ridiculous statement which says that "why she quit acting and where she went are a mystery to this day...." which was completely untrue. Everyone knows she lived in New York City and walked a lot. People saw her all over the city for years and years. Why she quit has also been well documented. So this slow moving, poorly narrated, idiotically stylized documentary teaches us nothing. Why is that woman in the blond wig reading papers while someone who sounds like Madonna using her fake British accent does a voice over? Why are the creepy papier machet masks necessary-symbolism? Wow, that's a high school play level plot device. The whole thing was off-putting, cringy, shallow and took away from the only decent parts, which was the interviews with people who knew her.

I love documentaries and was so excited to watch this and learn more about Garbo. This was extremely boring and provided mostly surface level information. More time was spent showing an actor holding a weird fake head in front of her own or flipping through papers than clips of Garbo. And yes, I understood the point of the fake head, I just found it an unnecessary waste of time. The film would touch on something quite briefly but wouldn't explore it deeper and would quickly move on. It left me constantly hoping for more but I was disappointed each time. Surely there is more information out there about a fascinating person like Garbo. Don't waste your time.

The actual documentary portiona of the film are excellent. In a huge Garbo devoté and I learned many things about her. But the bizarre and annoying conceit of the blonde wigged woman reading notes and repeatedly uncapping her pen is extremely annoying. Every time she shows up, balancing on her ballet slippers and reading notes im very annoyed!!! Her dialect and accent are so fake I can't stand it. She's completely affected and self aware and performative and it's truly awful. The actual footage is informative and well edited. I cannot imagine what they were thinking weaving the narrative with the wigged waif. Ugh!