Monster Mash

So bad I was laughing at myself for even watching until the end!

Like someone else mentioned it could have been great with the characters involved but the story is just all over the place and makes no sense at what some of their purpose is to assist Dracula get his daughter back and stop Frankenstein. They just seem to tag along lol! The guy who plays Dracula is probably the best thing about the movie, I feel bad that he was reduced to this role.

I literally couldn't stop laughing at how bad it was and then I just thought, well it's given me a good laugh at least.

Take it with a pinch of salt I'd say ;)

Who was the audience supposed to be? The horror crowd?...it failed. The drama crowd?....nope. The comedy/parody vultures? Heck no.

Of course, it is low budget and Michael Madsen is broke but that notwithstanding this is terrible. It has not redeeming features. The acting is terrible. The script is weary. The effects are poor. The direction amateurish. The lighting and cinematography lack any kind of subtlety. It really is is first class horse you know what.

So why not give it one? Well at least they tried. Making coherent and professional movies on this budget must be difficult and almost impossible to get In cinemas.

Doesn't stop it being rubbish though.

Is this a joke?

I was honestly waiting for the punchline.

Waiting for the scene that would indicate this was meant as a comedy or parody of vintage Horror films.

But it never came.

The movie contains every frickin' monster Universal could imagine jammed into one film, and not comfortably.

Poor acting, poor lighting, painfully long dialogue and...Micahel Madsen.

Oh how far you've fallen from Reservoir Dogs.

This film should be dropped into a reservoir.

Listen, I think classic Universal is some of the best celluloid ever produced.

And I understood the homage paid to the classic era of monsters.

Even the scary warnings theaters used to show before a cheesy bad monster flick.

Before...before!!...not three quarters of the way into the movie!!

This was a joke right? ...right?

First the movie. Possibly one of the worst I have seen, and that includes my 2000+ reviews here. The lighting is so dark from scene to scene you might actually think the screen on your device has failed. The writing and acting and overall effect -- or lack of same -- will make you wish the film had originally been done in any language other than English. That way, at least, you could dismiss the end result as bad dubbing. Or bad subtitling. But none of that is "the" extraordinary thing about this film. The extraordinary thing about this release is that the marketer decided to throw all the lemons into the metaphorical blender and make lemonade. The press kit for MONSTER MASH actually touts the fact that it was shot in only 5 days -- like that is a plus! Feels more like 5 hours. Worse, some reviewers actually fell for this hustle, and praised the end result as "campy" ... and "fun". The only fun thing about this movie is pressing the STOP button and taking your trade elsewhere. Except for the marketing. The marketing is brilliant. And campy. And fun. ((Designated "IMDb Top Reviewer." Please check out my list "167+ Nearly-Perfect Movies (with the occasional Anime or TV miniseries) you can/should see again and again (1932 to the present))

Seriously.. if you didn't/don't enjoy this movie, it's because you take life way too seriously. Yeah, the movie is campy as hell. It's not meant to be a big budget, hollywood horror fest. It's a cheesy, campy, low budget, b-movie good time. It's comical. It's fun. It's entertaining. If you are looking for serious... try the news networks. You'll get plenty of horror there.

My one and only complaint is the same complaint that I have for most every single movie made post-2000... BUY A LIGHT BULB! And I don't want to hear that this is supposed to be "back in the day" before they had electric lights. First, movies set in this era have been made for decades and they were lit perfectly fine, thank you very much! Secondly, there are literally electric lights in Dr. Frankenstein's laboratory. Most of the movie is so dark, you might as well close your eyes and you'd still get the same effect.

Other than that, if you are just looking for a good movie night flick, you could do much worse!