Les dents du bayou

"Ragin Cajun Redneck Gators" (aka "Alligator Alley") is one of those movies. You know, those kind of monstrous creature features, that just have way too awful effects to come off as properly being good entertainment.

The story is about a young girl named Avery (played by Jordan Hinson) who returns to the swamps of Louisiana to her family after having been away for college. The ongoing feud between the Robichaud and Doucette families is still blazing, and things doesn't take a turn for the better when the Robichaud family's failed moonshine brew turns the local alligator residents into mutated giants hungry for human flesh.

Essentially the story did have some good things to it here and there, but it was all just brutally slaughtered with the worst CGI alligators ever to make it to the screen. I mean, seriously, these are without a doubt amongst the top five of worst creature CGI effects I have ever seen.

The characters in the movie are painfully stereotypical to the point where it is starting to become embarrassing to bear witness to.

As for the acting, well, for a movie of this particular genre and type, then it was alright. Nothing mind-blowingly impressive though, mind you.

And as if giant, mutated man-killing alligators wasn't enough, wait to you find out what happens later on, it just goes from being silly to downright stupid. Trust me...

"Ragin Cajun Redneck Gators" is the type of movie that you will suffer through once, out of sheer boredom, and never to make a return trip to watch it ever again. There just wasn't anything worthwhile to support a second watching - unless you count horrible CGI creatures as worthwhile, of course.

Ragin Cajun Redneck Gators (2013)

** 1/2 (out of 4)

Not only does this film have one of the greatest titles in the history of cinema, it also manages to be one of the most entertaining movies to appear on SyFy. The story is pretty simple as a girl (Jordan Hinson) returns home to see that her family is still feuding with their neighbors and worst of all is that these neighbors have been dumping bad moonshine into the swamps, which has created large, redneck gators. Once again I find myself reviewing a SyFy movie and wondering why so many people go into a movie called RAGIN CAJUN REDNECK GATORS and are expecting some sort of quality material. Again, if you're wanting CITIZEN KANE then don't watch a film called RAGIN CAJUN REDNECK GATORS. It should go without saying but this is a pretty bad little movie but thankfully there's enough camp to make it quite entertaining. I think the best thing going for this are the horrendous CGI alligators, which are among some of the worst things you're ever going to see but thankfully they're funny, which adds to the entertainment. The scenes of the gators attacking are so poorly done and the blood so fake looking that it's impossible to take these scenes serious, which is another good thing. The performances are quite mixed at best but I thought Hinson was good enough in the lead. The film manages to have quite a few funny moments, which is about all you can hope for when watching something like this. The direction is pretty good throughout since he does manage to keep things moving at a nice pace, which, again, is about as much as you can hope for in a film like this. With that said, this is still a "C" level horror movie that aired on SyFy so obviously the material is very thin, runs out of gas before the conclusion but it's a creature feature that has enough entertaining moments.

Pouring rank blue chemicals in a Louisiana swamp somehow causes the alligator population to morph into monstrous creatures with werewolfish vampirisms. They have cool spikes in their tails, which are used to immobilize victims before the kill. Like the title reveals, they have red necks. The local redneck population consists mostly of two extended families, who feud like the Hatfields and the McCoys. They also drink, hunt and eat like slobs. Our heroine is leggy Jordan Hinson (as Avery Doucette). She left the area to attend college and avoid becoming another of the "in-bred bottom feeders" noted in the script...

While away at school, Ms. Avery gave up her gun-toting ways (she's a sure-shot, naturally) and became an animal-loving vegan. Her refusal to hunt alligators will come and go, depending upon the situation. Of course, she's carrying on a romance with the rival family's most eligibly muscular member, John Chriss (as Dathan Robichaud). Several in the supporting cast, led by spitting Christopher Berry (as Bud), have fun. Gold-toothed Ritchie Montgomery (as Lucien Doucette) and oddly-accented Thomas Francis Murphy (as Wade Robichaud) are the hammy family patriarchs. Over the top Amy Brassette (as Candy) has a blast.

**** Ragin Cajun Redneck Gators (9/5/13) G.E. Furst ~ Jordan Hinson, John Chriss, Christopher Berry, Ritchie Montgomery

RELEASED TO TV IN 2013 and directed by Griff Furst, "Ragin' Cajun Redneck Gators" (aka "Alligator Alley") takes place in the Louisiana bayous when Avery (Jordan Hinson) returns from college (indoctrinated by liberalism, of course) to her redneck homestead where her kin are still feuding with a neighboring family. While she secretly dates the handsome son of the enemy (John Chriss), literal red-necked gators attack, mutated by bad moonshine that was poured into the swamp. But something even worse starts happening.

The title keys off that this is a campy, silly monster movie and not to be taken seriously, although there's some semi-serious dramatics and horrifics. Anyone wanting solemn horror should go to the Exit now. Jordan Hinson as the protagonist is a major attraction as she's winsome and all-around easy on the eyes. There's a little bit of "The Alligator People" (1959) thrown in to keep things interesting. Bottom Line: It's not great, but it's mildly entertaining as an amusing creature feature. Just remember: If the rednecks don't get ya... the gators will.

THE MOVIE RUNS 88 minutes and was shot in St. Amant & Baton Rouge, Louisiana. WRITERS: Keith Allan, Rafael Jordan & Delondra Williams.

GRADE: C+

After 4 years away from home while attending college, a young woman named "Avery Doucette" (Jordan Hinson) returns to her family in the Louisiana bayou one day prior to alligator hunting season. What nobody knows is that a local family headed by "Wade Robichaud" (Thomas Francis Murphy) has been making moonshine using a strange new chemical which ends up contaminating several batches which are subsequently dumped into the swamp. This causes the local gator population to mutate into extremely large and savage creatures of a type never seen before--and their feeding season on humans has just begun. Throw in a deadly family feud between the Doucettes and the Robichauds and things are about to get deadly in the bayou. Now rather than reveal any more I will just say that it's the comedy-more than the action, horror or suspense-that makes this film even remotely interesting as the other qualities just mentioned are almost non-existent. Likewise, the extremely ridiculous ending certainly didn't help much either. In any case, if not for the aforementioned humor, I would have scored this film a bit lower but as things are I rate it as just slightly below average.