Tape 407

I am speechless. I am without speech.

How? Why? Who made this???

I am 50 minutes into the film, the monster has been seen in just a few frames so far, all blurred, they have been bickering without a break for half an hour, and they are in a house in the middle of the night, in the middle of nowhere, as well, with light coming through one of the windows. It's not the moon, because it has been established that its totally dark. My guess is that the incompetent team decided to put a light there so the monster that's stalking them could be silhouetted for a second, again in a blurred image. Oh, and our crazy camera person, who is filming everything for some reason, turns the camera away from the monster whenever it makes an appearance. Also convenient for the CGI team, but bad news for the audience. This film makes no sense at all. The premise is moronic, even by found footage standards, the monsters are crap, and the characters literally scream and bicker without a break. They don't stop even as they are being eaten. Usually several quarrels would be taking place simultaneously. Do the filmmakers think the audiences will be immersed in the plot if they are made to endure this pointless and unmotivated bickering? Do they think we might empathise with the characters more? Cause, as many others have noted in the reviews, these characters are all obnoxious and you can't wait for them to die because you literally hate their guts. Watching this film is outright torture.

I attended a late night showing in a seedy section of downtown Los Angeles which put me in the mood to be scared already, plus it was the night before Halloween and several theater goes were in costumes so the mood was set for what was to follow. The film opens with two sisters traveling cross country and documenting it on their video camera. The younger of the two is quite annoying and I was wishing already that something horrific would happen to her. The character development was slick as it was all done via the words of each of themselves speaking to our little vixens of the friendly skies. After a few minutes of small talk as the passengers board the plane we are treated to an obnoxious passenger that is obviously in need of a drink or has already had one too many and things go downhill from there for this doomed flight. Once on the ground things take an eerie turn in another direction as we now have changed from a disaster film to a horror film! Delightful gore and confusion follows our wayward sojourners as the plot thickens and the mayhem continues. This movie began like a roller coaster ride as we clickety-clacked and climbed to a fever pitch height in order to be brought crashing down with a violent momentum that had like any great amusement park ride, an ending that makes you say "Oh wow I didn't see one coming!".

The found footage genre is all but played out, but every now and then someone comes along to deliver a different take on it. The most popular genre to use this technique seems to be horror as a new one comes out all the time. The latest Area 407 delivers their take in this style in hopes of possibly delivering something new.

Area 407 follows a group of people involved in a plane crash. What they don't realize is that they have crash landed in a government testing area and something more sinister is out there with them. The story is pretty simple and works well delivering some decent build up and creepy moments. Throughout the story it slowly builds keeping you wondering what is chasing these unsuspecting victims. What really puts things off on this film are some of the characters. They all spend the majority of the film either screaming, fighting, or complaining making the whole thing gets real old real fast. You expect a certain level of this behavior in this situation, but they overplay it for so long you spend most of the time annoyed and waiting for something to kill them. There is never too much explanation on what is really going on other than the government's involvement which would be fine had it not had the ending it did.

Unlike a lot of these films, there is a pay off at the end even if it's not all that great. Once you see the direction the film leads it makes some of the previous moments in the film not make as much sense in regards to some of the kills. This isn't a horrible addition to this genre, actually for a smaller budget it's not all that bad, but with some toned down characters and a little more discovery could have been much better.

http://www.examiner.com/movie-in-dallas/bobby-blakey

Before watching this movie I read several reviews and was so disheartened by them that I was ready to burn the DVD and forget about it, but then, remembering past similar experiences decided against burning the CD (pollution) and to give it a try.

I started watching the film with great apprehension, specially after hearing the squeaky, high pitch, unbearable voice of the blonde girl, but breathing deeply I kept firmly in my decision to see this movie.

I was quite surprised to find it not bad at all! specially the first part, until the plane crash. From then on, this gimmick with the hand held camera as the only visual support for the story was a bit too much, and later on, almost oppressive and tiresome to a screaming point (my nerves!).

I'm sorry the monster didn't kill the blond teenager at the very beginning of the movie, because she was really unbearable. The fat passenger was a very good actor, because he really was that kind of character that you want to strangle with your bare hands, and he kept it up for the whole length of the movie.

The airline hostess was another lovable character, and a very good actress, since she really gave the impression that catering to airplane passengers was her daily métier.

I found two unpardonable faults with this film: The hand held camera as the only camera to shoot the whole movie and the very last scene, where we get to see (fortunately very briefly) something that should have never been shown. When will they learn (the makers of thrillers) that showing "the thing" is always a let down for the believability of the story?

That's why in "Rebecca" (Alfred Hitchcock - 1940) Rebecca never appears, not even for a moment, not even as a shadow. She was (they specially emphasize it) "the most beautiful creature I have ever seen" as one of the characters says and who could have portrayed such a creature? (Ava Gardner or María Félix, of course) but there is nothing like our own IMAGINATION and Hitchcock new it.

In this case I'm afraid they didn't know that.

The movie is too noisy with screams and shouting and crying and that goes on for too long with a hand held camera shaking your brains continuously by moving hysterically in all directions at once, making the watching very fatiguing. But it isn't such a horrendous film as so many critics said in their reviews. I don't have the heart to recommend it, I'll leave it up to you.

I thought that, being some kind of fan of found footage movies, nothing could really let me down so much. Man, was I wrong.

Here we have a film with no qualities whatsoever. At the beginning, I was happy to see a girl (Jess) who reminded me of a chick I went out with a few times ages ago (hey, Rosemary, hello if you are there!). I decided to try to cope with the EXTREMELY annoying mixture of nails running through a blackboard and forks scratching a plate that is the voice of the sister (Trisha). Boy, this -supposedly- 13 years old girl not only behaves like she's 8, but that bloody screeching thing she had for a voice... Jesus Christ. Anyway, at the very beginning, I found the actors natural enough and I thought "ok". Then, 5 minutes into the movie, I was starting to wonder why nothing is happening at all. After the movie goes on and the "actors" show their true colours of stereotypes and horrendous acting, I started to skip chunks by fast forwarding because NOTHING happens in this movie. There's a lot of unrelated talk, of walking around while they are at it, when they are not simply getting hysterical for no reason or repeating "shut up, Charlie". I could fast forward 5 minutes and they'd still be talking about the same (how my leg is hurting or how tired they are), still the camera focusing on their strides while they walk a dirty road. The whole movie is like that.

In total, I'd say that, throughout the 1h 29sec of film, we get to see 5 seconds of blurry bad CGI (2 of them at the very end of the movie). And perhaps about 10 secs of (what is supposed to be?) scary noises (a mixture of lions in heat and dinosaurs with bowel problems). That's all there's to this movie. There's no terror, sense of dread, no real mystery or feeling of threat. SERIOUSLY. NONE. Not even a jack-in-the-box type of scare.

At some points, I smiled or even laughed a couple of times because of the crap acting or ridiculous situations (which are suppose to be very serious and frightening).

At some point, as well, I stopped thinking about that girl I used to know and forgot about hoping to see the actress showing her big bare bust (sorry, I had to focus on something during this garbage of a film, and like I said, she brought back memories of someone else) and simply hated her, like the rest of the people involved in this pathetic movie.

I could almost say that, as an exception, the IMDb score is right. Although, on second thought, that's not correct. This movie deserves a much lower score. This movie is RIDICULOUS. Maybe your 5 years old child will find some amusement while wasting precious time instead of doing something more useful. Like, nothing. After all, that's what they do in this movie. Why would you watch a fiction when you or your toddler can experience firsthand the excitement of doing nothing?

So, hey, if you are bored with your friends, grab a couple of cameras, go out there with some of them while some others hide in the bushes farting a couple of times for scary special effects, run a bit for 2 minutes screaming around and making crazy people noises while drooling, get some tomato sauce on your temples, stop and talk about the weather for 15 minutes and repeat. You can edit the film back at home and use any freeware to add some shitty visual effects for a fraction of a second here and there. You need to be no computer expert! And voilà. Oh, and remember, getting a chubby busty girl to do a topless might get you that extra point!

..Although, you'd probably need more money to achieve that frontal nudity than the total budget for the entire piece of art.