Old Fashioned

I put a great deal of trust in IMDb ratings and reviews, and this Christian love story hanging just below 7/10 was more than enough encouragement for my girlfriend and I to give it a shot this Valentine's weekend. Let me advise you to do otherwise.

We received reliable reviews that this film was "not preachy", and a cut above other Christian films. I enjoyed 'The Ultimate Gift', 'Fireproof', etc. but could not choke this one down, though there was plenty of choking. We winced at each exchange between the main character and his 'predestined' love. The dialogue bluntly beats the viewer over the head with the message that Victorian-era courtship is the only proper way to interact with a woman in a laughably misogynistic presentation of our culture. In the film, simple-minded women are totally at the mercy of their man's virtue or lack thereof, and men are bound to take advantage of that unless they drink tea with their aunt periodically, or something like that. Filmmakers are free to present their message, but someone should tell Swartzwelder that a little subtlety and creativity goes a long way.

We chose not to stick around and learn more about the protagonist's dark past of Girls Gone Wild videotapes. The pretty cinematography couldn't distract from the 'Leave it to Beaver' morals, gushy prattle and suffocating veneration of gramophones, shooting hoops and wood working. Neither of us had walked out of a film before, but 'Old Fashioned' proved to be a ground-breaking film in this regard only.

Let's start with our main character (and director) Clay. He is a 40+ year old man that runs an antique store while dressing like a frat boy with a surfer's haircut. Clay is so out of control of his desires that he can't even be in the same room with another woman and believes in the teaching's of a radio shock jock that says "women are stupid" (Direct quote) while desiring such power that he enforces his beliefs on others without question. Now you may think this gentleman is some kind of terroristic person attempting to impose sharia law on law abiding citizens. Surprise! Clay is a deeply religious Christian man that can't help stopping his friend's bachelor party and kicking everyone out instead of just leaving because he feels uncomfortable. Be as religious as you want, Clay, just let other people live their lives the way they would like to because this is America and that's kind of the whole idea.

The female lead is pretty charming, though, and the there are some great looking shots of the Ohio landscape, but more than anything this film is a boring lesson on how to be a preachy, controlling dick.

I found this movie to be excellent. The cinematography was crisp, complete and didn't stumble in its presentation. The acting was solid and believable, not overdone. The use of the soundtrack with the selected scenes was perfect. The music didn't draw your attention away from the picture, it was complimentary to the actions involved and provided a soft pulse. The story was well written and it made you think about what is important in both life and relationships in ways I feel most people have long since forgotten. I think you would be doing yourself a disservice if you choose not to wrap your arms around this film, settle into its warmth and open your soul to the message it delivers.

This movie is utter garbage. The guy comes off creepy, disturbing and frankly alarming. DO NOT WATCH THIS FILM.

Old Fashioned is original, honest, and compelling.

A gem of a film in the faith-based genre, it had just the right amount of tension and humor, and a wide array of perspectives on love and relationships. Swartzwelder's approach to faith, life, forgiveness and grace is refreshing for the genre and is sure to give audiences plenty to think about when the credits roll. Elizabeth Roberts is charming and magnetic. I expect to see her a lot more around Hollywood.

I thoroughly enjoyed this movie and can't wait to see what's next from Rik. Fathers, take your sons to this movie. Mothers, take your daughters. This is a movie worth seeing, not just because of its message, but because it's a good story, well told.