Blubberella

Lindsay Hollister is the lead actress playing a half human / half vampire living in 1940 Nazi Germany... in her perfectly normal 2011 apartment with a smartphone, net access, Mac computer and I do know what insert Apple product here... Yes it's that kind of movie.

The movie is a shot for shot parody of Blood Rayne 3. I think you can guess what the joke is from that horrendous title.

Sadly this movie only works as an inside joke as all the "funny" bits were simply to change one thing from the shot of the original movie. If you don't have that movie memorize or even bothered to see it then you won't get the joke... and see how anti humor it is.

Make no mistake. This movie is offensive and the director went that extra mile to humiliate the lead actress for being plus size because.... I don't know maybe he thinks pointing at people that aren't stick figures is funny? It's a shame because she's actually good and totally wasted in this heap of trash.

Then you have Willam Belli who is simply FABULOUS! but no, here he is made to act the typical 90's gay friend and then black face... there is an actor with black face in a 2011 movie. I'm serious!

This movie was bad, offensive and weird. If you know what you're in for then you'll get a few laughs out of it. Mostly for the wrong reasons but you can still have some stupid fun with it.

If on the other hand you are unfamiliar with this director's work or blood rayne then take out your electric fan and will the stench of this heap away. You WILL hate it .

I have seen a lot of bad pictures over my 50+ years, but this one absolutely takes the cake. I have seen all of Ed Wood's terrible movies, and even those are better than this. At least Wood's movies were laughable, albeit unintentionally. This movie tries to get laughs, gets none, and is possibly the most tedious, boring and useless movie ever put to celluloid. Rarely will I walk out on a movie less than a third of the way into it, but this movie is so bad, it was actually painful to watch. I feel bad for Ronny Howard's brother, who must have been desperate for work to have taken this acting job. This movie is a colossal waste of time. Even if you are bored to tears, this would only make it worse!

Boll parodied his own movie. Beyond Cringe, but there are few films like it.

This film obviously had a budget. They filmed on location in Croatia, more sets than I can remember, and even paid Ron Howard's creepy bro to be horrible in it- but how does this film get made??? Set in WWII but there are laptops, they have sex with clothes on but it's supposed to be real with orgasm, they are slapping people as a running gag but it was never funny. The editing was so disjointed...or was it the actual plot. And just because you're fat doesn't necessarily mean you are funny. A fat dancing woman isn't always funny either. All these over-the-top characters aren't funny because the actors don't go all the way with them. They don't have the training and confidence so it doesn't fly. And people are drifting in and out of accents so you don't know if it's a gag or if they are just bad. I say it's all bad, an unfunny comedy with a terrible plot, horrid acting and disjointed filmmaking.

You know, I recently watched Uwe Boll's FAR CRY and thought to myself, Boll has actually made a decent film here. Perhaps he's improving as a director. I've subsequently sat through a kind of double-bill of AUSCHWITZ and now this, and I have to revoke that thought. Because AUSCHWITZ was bad, but BLUBBERELLA is by far Boll's worst film ever, as well as one of the worst films I've ever had the misfortune to sit through.

The joke is that Blubberella is a morbidly obese girl who fights Nazis in some kind of amateur WW2 setting. There's also some nonsense about her being half vampire although that has nothing to do with the story. Instead, what we get is a pantomime-style film with constant and offensive jokes about overweight people, different nationalities, and anything else. There's even a scene of blackface which has to be seen to be believed.

Lindsay Hollister as the main actress is humiliated throughout and I felt acutely sorry for her. Michael Pare must be wondering how far his fortunes can sink by appearing in this. The only decent actor is Clint Howard playing a creepy doctor in the usual Clint Howard style, but that's it. Uwe Boll's cameo as Hitler is the worst ever. The crude sexual jokes and the like take the biscuit and the film is too cheap to include any action, effects, or real storyline. It's absolutely awful in every way and I wish I'd never seen it.