Au premier regard

... of discovery as a blind adolescent boy falls in love for the first time and embarks on his journey to manhood with the arrival of Gabriel at his school, much to the annoyance of his best friend Giovana.

If you want to feel that Oh-my-God-I-am-in-love-for-the-first-time feeling, hunt down a copy of this movie and fasten up your seat belt.

There are a lot of movies out there that pertains to the burdens of gay teenagers. However, this one seriously made its way to my heart. This is nothing mainstream, not even a hint of being a novelty film. I was jumping up and down, I cried, I laughed, I felt confused--this is a bomb;a ticking time-bomb. And the only thing that makes the ticking faster is the beat of your heart.

This is a hidden gem, a must-watch for those who are tired of mainstream movies. It is like reading a book but in a multi-sensory way and what makes this film unique is the fact that you cannot simply move on. You'll always be haunted by this movie and you'll find yourself tying the strings of your heart tighter.

A simple, minimalist movie, very different from the current productions. Instead of explosions, too much talk, chop edition, grandiloquent music, Hoje Eu Quero Voltar Sozinho show the daily lives of ordinary teenagers, revealing their questions, doubts, conflicts, always in a subtle, gentle way. With very little, Daniel Ribeiro conveys much. The film speaks to teens who identify with the characters, especially the gay teens, but goes further by advocating tolerance and relativize the desire .. The world would be better if there were more movies like this one. Hoje Eu Quero Voltar Sozinho won the fipresc prize at Berlin Film Festival. The Hollywood Repórter wrote about the fist work of Daniel Ribeiro: "A blind boy falls in love with another boy -- but it's his desire for independence that's the motor of this beautifully observed drama".

First off, let me just say this: if you haven't watched the movie yet, I strongly recommend you not to watch the short film first. I found that watching the short film first ruined my watching experience of this movie.

I actually forgot how I stumbled upon this movie; I think the movie trailer was auto-played by the Youtube player. Anyway, it is indeed a great film, and I was so happy to have come across this movie by accident.

To be frank, one of the reasons I was keen on watching this film is because of its high rating. It's just a few marks below one of my absolute favorites, Weekend (2011), which stimulated me to watch this film.

Basically, this movie is an elaborated version of the short film. The two films more or less have the same plot. I always think it's hard to turn an outstanding short film into an outstanding 90-minute movie. This one definitely did not disappoint me. When I was watching the movie, I was thinking why it could get such a high rating. Well, the reason is really simple: it is genuine. None of the dialogues is misplaced; the emotions are heartfelt; and the cinematography is indeed splendid. The actors made the plot believable too: Gabriel (Audi) and Leo (Lobo) were great actors; they conveyed the emotions smoothly. I was surprised to know Audi's real age and Lobo's normal eyesight. I guess that is evidence that they really carried the story well.

There are one or two scenes which can be considered slightly explicit, but they don't exist just for the visual stimulation. They carry weight, reveal characters' inner-feelings, and move the plot forward. You know, some films include explicit sex scenes which indeed provide pleasure for the viewers, but this movie is not one of them.

I also loved how the plot is so simple yet heartwarming. Like some reviewers have pointed out, this movie does remind you of what first love feels like, especially for gay teenagers. The confusing emotions and the hesitation of whether to trust your feelings are revealed splendidly in this movie. Also, the fact that the film involves a blind character adds a twist to the movie. The plot is indeed a wonderful one, but after watching the movie, I can only wonder whether a blind, gay teenager falling in love with a new student who also happens to be gay is plausible. I'm not saying that the fairytale ending is implausible, but the way that the movie is packaged as "a beautiful youth story" took away a tiny bit of my love for this movie. Hence why it's a 8/10, not 9. Nonetheless, in this world where gay stories almost never have happy endings, I will gratefully take this movie.

One more point to add: I don't know if critics have noticed, but clothing have become a recurrent theme in gay film and literature. Like Jack's bloodstained shirt in Brokeback Mountain (2005) and Oliver's "Billowy" shirt in André Aciman's novel "Call Me By Your Name" (2007), Gabriel's jacket has become one more item to be included in the recurrent theme of "clothing" in gay film and literature. The meaning of clothes is not just on physical but also metaphorical level, and in this film, Leo's yearning for Gabriel is best revealed by how he treated Gabriel's jacket.

Let's just put it this way: if you haven't seen the movie, you need to watch it as soon as possible.

I remember watching the short film this was based on, and loved it. Upon finding out that a feature film was made, I was dying to see it. As it is, this is pretty similar, although the arc development occurs more gradually and slower of course. The two leads' chemistry is as palpable as it was in the short film, and they make their scenes together work. Their performances, taken on their own, are particularly effective, Lobo in particular. The story as it is isn't anything wholly original, but it doesn't need to be. All it needs to do is make us believe in it and we do. I strongly recommend this gem of a film and I really hope it's seen by more people.