Monsters in the Woods

This movie was God awful started with a man and woman having sex which I really don't understand why horror movies have to throw sex in there it doesn't make it any better for me if I want to see a sex movie I'll rent a porno I don't get it anyways this movie went no place after about 30 minutes I couldn't handle it anymore I took it out I will not watch this movie again I hate when they try to make documentaries like this and they go no place simply awful do yourself a favor don't ever buy this movie the movie I bought with came with 10 movies some are really lame some are so so. This one had terrible active I could have acted better myself just awful.

This movie is so dull and boring that even The Asylum or Troma might be embarrassed to release it. The plot in a nutshell is : a bunch of wanna-be film-makers venture into the woods to make a bad horror movie and are set upon by the afore-mentioned and barely-seen rubber-masked assailants. The movie is horribly 'color-corrected' into green-tinted nonsense. The 'FX' are not bad enough to be laughable or good enough to impress anyone. There is virtually no gore or even any nudity of note, but they DO toss in an impressive amount of 'Wilhelm Screams' and Commodore Amiga-caliber gunshots. O and there's a cave that looks like a menstruating vagina.

I will give this film one positive comment and that is that it was ambitious and tried to some degree to make something a little bit campy but the buck stops there. First of all the acting is soooo bad that it wasn't even funny. Where did they find these people, with the exception of the director of the film and maybe the angel 1/2 way through the rest was just deplorable. Oh My God I just could'nt believe that this film got distribution. There must've been some collusion between the distribution and the makers of this film. I thought Episode 50 and bad bush were bad, this drives them to the supermarket. In fact this film may qualify for top 10 worst films I have ever seen. Monsters in the woods is so discursive that you have no idea what is going on for most of the film. Stay far away unless your on some serious drugs and alcohol because thats what it might take to remotely enjoy this calamity.

Somebody out there got hold of a video camera, and like Mickey Rooney in the 1930s said, " let's make a movie." Amateurish acting, an incomprehensible script, and silly make up add up to a total waste of 84 minutes; root canal would be preferable.

The editing and story structure is horrible beyond belief. The "Blair Witch Project" started a style of low budget filmmaking which Monsters continues. The creatures in this mess look like puppets created at the Jim Henson studios, although Kermit the frog would have made it more interesting.

The evil muppets come out of a cave containing the portal to hell which must be sealed to save the earth from ruin; I have no idea what the people who created this garbage were thinking. It's not funny or scary.

I can only advise any potential viewer to avoid " Monsters in the Woods" at all costs; trust me; it is horrendous.

I don't get the hate this movie is receiving, don't get me wrong I am by no means saying its a great movie, honestly I don't know if I would even really say its a good movie, but its clearly not a bad one.

I mean the monsters looked great, a real throw back to the old school monster movies I enjoyed so much as a child, the rest of the f.x. gags where fun, the acting was... I'll go with OK, but over all I don't feel like I was robbed of the 2 hours I spend watching this, it will just fade into the hundreds of other nameless monster movies I've seen over the years. Lets be honest about one thing though. Even before I saw the budget, with a name like monsters in the woods you should not be expecting to get a film like the "Artiest". Its going to be camp, its going to be "B" grade. If common sense did not tell you that you deserve not to enjoy the movie.