Ce qui vous attend si vous attendez un enfant

You know what I expect? I expect better movies! "What to Expect When You're Expecting" is once again another ensemble rom-com that's basically just a bunch of short stories glued together in a full-length motion picture. You know, with a cast like this, this movie would have been better off with a title like "What to Expect When You're 'Selling Out'". I wouldn't say that this movie was "god-awful", I suppose that maybe a married couple might enjoy something here, but this is still an unoriginal, predictable, and unmemorable piece of "nothing". Director Kirk Jones has provided to give us a giant predictable "sell-out" that does nothing but go with the usual clichés. In movies like this, we usually get a bunch of individual stories packed in one movie, some that we care about, and some that we don't care about. Each story talks about a group of couples who are about to either have a baby, adopt a baby, or deciding whether to have the baby or not. We've seen these stories plenty of times before, so there's already a clue for the audience to know what will happen next. There are some chuckle-inducing moments, and I cared for a few story lines, but it's just a shame because there are so many likable actors in this movie, so this might be considered as a waste of talent. Cameron Diaz plays a weight loss contestant on a reality show who's expecting a newborn with Matthew Morrison, Jennifer Lopez takes the "Angelina Jolie" perspective to adopt an African baby, Elizabeth Banks plays a pregnant woman with tons of anxiety problems on the torture of pregnancy, and what do you know, Chris Rock is actually the leader of a group of "baby daddies". These story lines are probably careless, and mostly not funny, if you ask me! The only two story lines I actually enjoyed involves Anna Kendrick as a young woman who is expecting a baby after a certain one-night stand, and Dennis Quaid as a NASCAR legend who's expecting a new baby with his much younger, and ridiculously hot wife, played by Brooklyn Decker. I actually need to score this movie some points for that! But either way, I wasn't surprised! This movie is exactly what everyone thought it was going to be, so I guess I can say I'm not really that upset with this movie. But "What to Expect When You're Expecting" is not worth watching in any way, but if you're the type of person who enjoys these type of movies, my advice to you...wait for rental! I didn't expect that remark to pop out of my mouth. "What to Expect When You're Expecting", in my review, "predictable and mediocre, but overall unimpressive".

Contrarily to this adapted verbose title, one shouldn't 'expect' much that is, unless literary desecration is in your hand of cards--if that is the game you're looking to play, then consider this mess a winner.

Inspired by Heidi Murkoff's multimillion-selling-self-help-book for expectant mothers--holding the same name--'What to Expect', the film, will be much less prolific. Obviously a lot more work, and money, towards getting an ensemble cast--as opposed to garnering producers with emphasis on purpose and ingenuity--the filmmakers, here, create a product that is not the least bit unique it's a generic label laden with followed genre-specific clichés, bawdy humor, and disjointed direction.

Despite its few laughs, known cast, and affecting hints towards pregnancy, 'What to Expect' is an over-packed piece of "luggage" that becomes too frustrating to haul around. An immersion too tediously futile and not nearly enough funny. Expect worse...

It's ironic that I am not a dad (or a soon-to-be one) and the funniest thing is that there are moments in which my mom went through the whole pregnancy issue, but I happen to enjoy a movie called "What to Expect When You're Expecting", based on the self-help book of the same name for soon-to-be mothers by Heidi Murkoff. Here's the good news: For men and women who are mothers and fathers or about to become those parents, you can relate to these certain issues: Miscarriages, infertility, contractions, hormones, adoption....the whole nine yards (or months) of surviving pregnancy. So, how to start reorganizing the plot? I know, how about I'll connect the story by the dots. Dot 1: Holly (The lovely Jennifer Lopez), a photographer and her husband Alex (Rodrigo Santoro) are about to adopt a baby from Ethiopia. Dot 2: Rosie (Anna Kendrick) and Marco (Chase Crawford, one of those heartthrobs from "Gossip Girl") are rival food-truck owners who had a one-night stand that results in a big oops. She does get pregnant until... (I'm not telling.) Dot 3: Wendy (the always lovable Elizabeth Banks) and her husband Gary (Ben Falcone from "Bridesmaids") are about to finally have a baby after two years of trying, only to find themselves competing with Gary's father Ramsey (Dennis Quaid), a race-car driver and his trophy wife, the gorgeous Southern Belle Skyler (Brooklyn Decker, yes, that Brooklyn Decker) who's eating for three. (You get the expression, right?) And finally for dot 4, Jules (Cameron Diaz), a trainer for a "Biggest Loser"-type TV show and Evan (the charming Matthew Morrison from my favorite show "Glee"), a dancer for a "Dancing with the Stars"-type show are expecting one, as well. Only to find their careers in chaos due to the baby issue. Oh, I forgot dot 5: The Dudes Group, run by Vic (Chris Rock) and his buddies (with kids) hang out every Saturday and helping poor Alex (from that first dot) on how to be a man and to become a dad. It's a heavy order to make a movie about the ups and downs of pregnancy, but director Kirk Jones and screenwriters Shauna Cross and Heather Hach walks a fine balance of what makes us laugh, what can we expect to happen and how to relate to those issues. The results for that makes it a very, very funny and unexpectedly moving film. When the pregnancy for the four of the five couples comes kicking in, it's realistic, moving, heartbreaking and utterly remarkable. The all-star cast, also including Australian comedienne Rebel Wilson (also from "Bridesmaids" and the upcoming "Pitch Perfect") as Wendy's assistant, Janice and Joe Manganiello from "True Blood" as the Dudes' Group's other (and hunky) Lone Wolf, Davis, are amazing. The stories that sometimes interconnect with one another are surprisingly good. And by the end, there's always that one movie that's made for adults and how the audience can relate to moments like that, which could happen in real life. I guess this is a movie that's, at least, worth expecting.

Honestly, the reason for seeing this movie was nothing more and nothing less than the desire to go to the cinema with a friend. With some other movies not interesting her, it was between The Lucky Ones and this one, both movies that have a low score on IMDb. I was pleasantly surprised, however, with not just the actors in the movie but also with the dialogue and chemistry on screen, which seemed very natural. I definitely enjoyed watching it and will most likely end up buying it on DVD; not even the fact that Chris Rock was in it bothered me, whereas I usually can't stand him. I have to applaud Jennifer Lopez too, I never thought much of her as an actress, but I found myself sympathizing with her and liking her portrayal of the character. Over all, I find that this movie deserves a higher score than it's currently got on IMDb.

What to Expect When You're Expecting (2012)

Director: Kirk Jones. Cast: Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Lopez, Elizabeth Banks, Chace Crawford, Anna Kendrick, Matthew Morrison, Dennis Quaid, Chris Rock.

Don't ask me what possessed me to go and watch this film. In my defence I can tell you that I had seen everything else at my local multiplex and I had 2 hours to spare. Also the cast seemed impressive enough... and, to top it all up, my wife is pregnant, so I thought at least I would fit its target audience just perfectly.

To be completely honest I was expecting (sorry about the pun) something a lot worse: this is one of those average ensemble comedies where, as always some of the stories and some of the characters are more successful than others but in the end they are so many of them that if you are a parent or preparing to be one, you're bound to find a something to like... Other than that, this is all pure middle-class Hollywood, pretty slick, light-hearted but with enough sweet-and-sour moments to make it feel like it's actually about something. Obviously at the end of the day it's all rather forgettable, and it's actually a great shame, because the acting talent a shown here is impressive (surprisingly even Jennifer Lopez showcases a nuanced performance unlike much we'd seen before) both directing and editing are potentially quite skilled at doing what they do and the few good moments here and there give you a little glimpse of what it could have been.

The main problem is that the film is just not funny enough to be able to be a crowd pleaser and looses itself among the too many subplots, some of which are way off the main subject, to be able to become a classic (the golf cart chase sequence is one of the lowest and unfunny points and the father group sequences, despite Chris Rock, are just too indulgent, over the top and long). However having said all this, I must confess, even though I laughed very little, I found myself moved a couple of times: oh dear, it really must be the hormones (I think they call it sympathetic pregnancy).

6/10 wp.me/p19wJ2-yv