The Human Centipede (First Sequence)

"The Human Centipede" will definitely repulse most of its viewers. It's not so much as gore-filled as say, "Hostel" or "Zombie", but it's the idea behind the movie that will leave a lingering, nauseating feeling days after you've seen it.

The story is simple: 2 American girls on vacation in Germany are invited to a party. They rent a car and on their way they get a flat tire. Unable to fix the problem by themselves they walk in the middle of the rainy night and arrive at what looks like a decent, upper class residence. A creepy old man let's them in so the girls can use his phone. Right from the start we know this guy is evil through and through. It seems the German guy is a respected surgeon, known for his "siamese twins" separation procedures. But the guy (who is ironically called "Josef", a nod to the angel of death himself: Josef Mengele)wants to try a new surgical procedure on the girls and with the help of another victim (a Japanese guys), he will create what he dubs, "The Human Centipede".

No explanation is given as to why this Josef guy wants to do a procedure that serves no purpose at all (unless he wants to sell freaks to traveling circuses), nor any background is ever mentioned or hinted at (it seems the director wanted to avoid any audience sympathy for this deranged doctor). Still, "The Human Centipede" remains a harrowing experience to watch.

When the movie was over, all I could think of was that the girls would've save themselves from A LOT of trouble had they known how to change a flat tire. Sure, they were going to a fancy party, were all dressed up and stuff but they never ever checked for a tire replacement in the trunk. They thought it would be "much easier" to walk in the middle of the night with the pouring rain on them in a country where they barely knew anyone or the language.

If it was me directing, I'd call this flick, "The Flat Tire"!

This is a disturbingly twisted, absurd yet original movie ... and it is the first of three! Made on a miniscule budget, The Human Centipede gives its audience some truly horrid moments. Two young (and annoying) American girls are in Europe and headed to a club when their rental car blows a tire in the middle of nowhere after dark (in these types of horror films -- surprise, surprise!). Needing assistance, they seek out the nearest shelter ... which just happens to be inhabited by Dr. Crazy-Psycho-Sick-Brained-Bastard. Offering the girls water while he "calls" for help, he has secretly drugged them to get them where he wants them (them along with another unfortunate third).

From the VERY literal and non-misleading title of the movie ... one can pretty much assume what he wants them to become. This is one of the sickest movies I have probably ever come across, and yet ... it is watchable -- highly watchable (as one continually asks themselves WHAT is coming next?!).

German actor Dieter Laser plays the mad doctor (who was world-renowned for separating Siamese twins) very well as he is most-convincing as a warped genius (who has LOST it). He may play for some slight camp ... but in this movie its allowed to work. There are many, many, many plot holes (or craters) here and there throughout the movie, but they can be overlooked because something with a title-like-this is given some liberties.

While this film was titled specifically for the curious-minded, it is not for the feint of heart or queasy. Disturbingly twisted and absurd, The Human Centipede is not a film that one will quickly forget.

Motto: "Behind every great man, there are two great women." 'The Human Centipede' gives the viewer a voyeuristic glimpse of the life of hobbyist Dr. Joseph Heiter whose ambitions are both exotic and daring. In the opening scene we find Joe sobbing about his failed past projects. We watch and feel Joe's strength as he makes the decision to put the past behind him and to face the future with renewed optimism. But, as Joe soon finds out, a hobbyist's life is not easy. The next day, Joe learns that a true hobbyist has to make great sacrifices, if he is to complete his project in the best possible way. The enfolding scenes serve as a reminder to all of us that a passionate man does not settle for less than perfection. Joe rests at nothing, does not sleep, and does not eat until his project is finished.

After what is truly a great start of his project, we follow Joe as he is dealt a setback and faces it heads-on. Fearing for the worst, in an exciting turn of events, Joe's inventiveness ultimately gets him back on track. From there on, he is heading straight for success. When the last part of his project is finally completed, we experience Joe's intense fulfillment through a rare display of affection (while he is a passionate and intense human being, Joe is not a people's person). In an emotional scene, we find Joe celebrating his success and taking pictures of his accomplishment. In a particularly gripping moment, Joe holds up a mirror to his project, as if for it to see its own beauty. The scene concludes with Joe lifting up the mirror like a trophy—an obvious tribute to the many successes of the German football team.

But his success is short-lived. It all starts with a phone ringing. Before Joe realizes what is going on, agents of an intrusive government are at his doorstep, threatening to jeopardize all that Joe has accomplished. Will the forces of bureaucracy prevail, or will Joe conjure up a clever plan to save his project, his spiritual livelihood? You will have to see for yourself.

The international cast delivers an enticing performance. No one plays a German like Dieter Laser (Joseph Heiter). Watching Ashlynn Yennie's convincing characterization of an American tourist (Jenny), it is hard to believe this is her debut role in a motion picture. It is a privilege to see Ashley Williams perform as the character Lindsay. Even a novice viewer should be able to recognize her extensive background in theater and musical theater and her world-class training at the American Academy of Dramatic Arts. Last but not least, although he did not speak any lines in a language that I could understand, I think Akihiro Kitamura played the part of some Japanese guy wonderfully.

All in all the film makes for a promising start of what should proves to be an exciting franchise not unlike such hits as Look Who's Talking Now and Harry Potter.

Viewer discretion: some scenes graphically depict the consumption of alcohol. Furthermore, the word 'ficken', a German verb, is uttered early on in the film. Finally, throughout the film brief flashes of nudity (nipple slips) can be seen.

Human Centipede, The (First Sequence) (2009)

** 1/2 (out of 4)

A couple dumb American girls (Ashley C. Williams, Ashlynn Yennie) are on a road trip in Germany when they head out to a party but suffer a flat tire. They decide to get out and walk and soon find themselves inside the home of Dr. Heiter (Dieter Laser) who drugs them and then takes them hostage. He captures another man and starts his dream operation of making a human centipede. There's a lot of hype going around about this film being the most shocking, disturbing and outrageous horror movie in decades but don't believe it. This isn't an exploitation movie so don't expect any gore, shocking violence or disgusting situations based around what actually takes place in the film. For the most part this is a pretty straight-forward film that goes by the "less is more" belief. Yes, what these three people go through is horrific but the film doesn't try to exploit the situation so those just looking for scenes of gross shocks are going to be disappointed. I think, for the most part, the film works because it's simply too original not to. The idea of putting three humans together (butt to mouth) to create a "dog" that can walk around with its master (the doctor) and take orders is a dark matter but it's interesting. The basic idea of this taking place is rather ridiculous and the film knows that and that's why we get some dark humor from time to time. This starts early on when the girls first get stranded as a perverted German man drives up to them talking dirty. The film also falls into some very stupid moments like who and why the girls end up at the house. They are on a road, which they could follow to get back to town or at least find someone yet they decide to walk through the woods where they're bound to get lost. Why would they be dumb enough to walk through the woods? Because if they had done the smart thing the movie would be over. As I said, this movie is rather tame in terms of violence and gore but I found this to be rather refreshing. The director constantly keeps us off guard because there are times when he throws things in that we wouldn't expect. Take for example the scene where the two police come to ask the doctor if he knows about the missing girls. In most movies the person would act innocent and make sure not to raise any suspicion. Not here as our man has a meltdown and makes sure that the police will come back. The visual site of the human centipede is actually pretty good and I give all three actors credit for making it work. I really didn't care for any of them in their "human" roles, especially the two girls, but as one long creature they work. Laser on the other hand is rather brilliant as the coldness he brings to the role really makes it work yet at the same time there's just something about him where you never really hate him. Strange that someone so evil could be so cold that it pretty much numbs you to the horror he's doing. It's certainly a very good performance but don't expect him to be welcomed at next year's Oscars. The movie isn't going to appeal to everyone but I do think the subject matter is going to keep people away who would probably find themselves into the movie more than they'd expect.

I finally got around to seeing this film and frankly I was not shocked; probably because I had read about its grossness far in advance. What I wasn't prepared for was the fact that a large part of the grossness was not actually shown, but rather spoken of and indirectly seen through bandage attachments. At some points it was very Hithcockian in the fear was instilled indirectly. Graphs showed how the surgery would be accomplished; only bits of the surgery were actually shown; the graphic defecation scene was verbalized and intimated. Very Hitchcock were the master of suspense a tad more mad. However, the scariest part of the film was Dieter Laser's performance. I can't recall ever seeing a mad scientist on film that projected madness and insanity as deeply as Mr. Laser……..Every time he was on screen you could feel your skin crawl with fear. Brilliant performance, mainly because it went to the edge of "over the top" but never actually got over the top. I've also read reviews which damned the actresses for not being "good actresses". A bunch of hooey for sure from those observers. I'd like to see them top the girls "tongue in cheek" performances. I never for a moment didn't see fear in their eyes, which btw is also another means of showing more fear than the actually surgery which was done while the cast was under anesthetics. In the beginning of the film you could feel the chemistry of the girls as they giggled about in their hotel room. A definite chemistry; one which would be needed as they got closer to each other at the Dr.'s house. Hats off to this film for sever reasons; suspense, fear and scare without an overload of blood and gore as in other films. Think of the Akitamura's job of convincing us that he was frightened, angry and scared in his native Japanese tongue, while again having tongue in cheek fears to contend with of his own character. Bottom line: An original, at the edge, horror film. Where does on go after that…..kudos to the cast for braving out a fully developed and overly imaginative film………..and to Mr. Six for following through. Can you imagine the sales pitch he had to prepare? Besides, our news media shows more graphic crap than this on their 24/7 newscasts (eg. There was more gore with Kadhafi killing, etc.)