Dinocroc vs. Supergator

There can't be anyone left in the civilised world, or even Belgium, who doesn't know what to expect from a SyFy original FooCritter vs BarBeast quota filler by now.

In case you want to bake your own, here's the recipe:

A title vomited out by the Random Creature Name Generator, run twice.

One has-been Name who neglected their 401K back when they could actually pick and choose their projects.

Half a dozen desperate wannabes, harvested from the weeping rejects of other people's auditions.

4000lbs of assorted bikinis, short-shorts and military surplus, plus sweater meat and six packs to fill them. Quality unimportant, just back the truck up, tip them all out, and we'll film whatever works.

2 buckets of plot and lines swept from the editing room of actual features.

A double-scoop of "nature's revenge" technobabble, with a generous sprinkling of pseudo-science so utterly and boldly bogus that it must surely qualify as deliberate nerd baiting.

60 seconds of ropey CGI, re-shown from every possible angle.

Shake vigorously and squeeze down a warm cable for 90 minutes.

Come on, you know exactly what you're getting. A dash of cleavage, a splash of CGI gore, plastic props that ejaculate the same muzzle flash every frame for 20 seconds - no need to reload if you're not even using real fake guns - a corpse-a-minute, and a climax that could charitably be described as genre compliant.

To be fair, this is a particularly moist and well baked example of the recipe. The walking snacks do a generally decent job of flashing their funbags and emoting their precious lines before queuing up to become lizard chow, the girl-next-door lead poppet is all eyes and pout, the male leads aren't obvious douches, and a few scenes feature something shockingly close to actual acting.

The CGI in particular is surprisingly well rendered, efficiently used (and re-used), and occasionally very decently integrated into the live shots, sometimes even matching variable light and shade - surely a SyFy first. The live action is also competently shot, edited and scored: this is clearly someone's day job.

All of which must be kept in perspective. Strictly relative to other SyFy features, Dinocroc vs. Supergator is about an 8/10, which applying the SyFy Fudge Factor puts it at a solid 4 on the real scale. Not bad at all, especially if you bring a few beers and low expectations.

OK, apparently, you have to either love these types of movies or hate them...Judging by the other reviews, that is what happens. Some really like these monster movies and others wonder why they bothered.

What I want to know is: Do these movies make MONEY?

Average commercial price during these is about $10k. I guess if they run the entire movie half a dozen times, then they make back the budget. But do a lot of people watch them? So advertisers are either getting a really good deal or wasting their money. I can't imagine the DVD doing well, only from rental places that might carry it...

I am just really curious if these movies make their money back, and why some other movie projects don't get green lights.

Two of the mightiest and most fearsome beasts the world has ever known are brought together for a titanic fight to the finish. Or not.

About all these two do is prowl around some island and make occasional jump-out-of-nowhere kills (as if creatures this big and toothy would need to attack from the shadows). Characters all look suspiciously familiar. There's a Xena wanna-be who looks like Natasha from a Bullwinkle cartoon. There's an Indy Jones clone, and the usual Fish & Game girl. Some Hawaiian print shirt guy blows up stuff. There are some dino-chases-jeep sequences. And don't forget the obligatory extras who show up just in time to get croaked.

It's intentionally campy, and really cheap. A 2-year-old with crayons could make more realistic special effects, and the story meanders aimlessly from scene to scene. As for the clash of the titans promised in the title; don't blink, or you might miss it. High schlock meter reading on this one, and good for some laughs at how dumb it is.

Having watched both "Dinocroc" and "Supergator" prior to this particular picture, I would just like to mention that there isn't much continuity between this film and either of its two predecessors. For starters, the original Dinocroc and Supergator were created in laboratories fusing dinosaur DNA with that of the respective creature. However, this movie takes a different approach and instead has scientists inserting a special growth hormone into both an alligator and a crocodile--who then subsequently escape and become man-eating monsters. In essence then, it's the same basic plot but with a slightly different formula used to get things started. Likewise, as far as the overall quality of this movie is concerned, I will just say that this movie shares many of the same faults as the other two as well. The acting is substandard, the special effects weren't very good and the suspense was non-existent. In short, this movie has very little novelty to offer viewers other than the fact that instead of one monster there are two. Other than that there is nothing really new. That said, unless a person really enjoys films of this type I would advise viewers to give this one a pass. Below average.

Like most other people, I can certainly appreciate a fun, campy B-flick but sometimes things are just too much to handle. This movie makes no attempt at ever trying to be creative or original and it isn't even really trying to be good. It's like the film-makers already gave up on things, before they even started shooting.

This means that the movie allows itself to be as silly as possible and it doesn't worry about any logic or consistency. It's mostly a very random movie, that seems to be thrown together from an one hour brainstorm session, Roger Corman had with his staff.

The lack of true creativity and originality with its story was truly the thing that bothered me the most. It does not only borrow heavily from other movies, it even borrows from itself. The movie is repeating itself numerous times throughout the movie and at times even recycles its own footage. 20 minutes in, the movie is already running out of steam and ideas.

The most random things about this movie are its killings. There is not really any logic to it as to why Dinocroc and Supergator are killing certain people. You would think they are doing it for food but sometimes they are simply crushing people and seem to be wanting to kill as many random people as possible. And I mean some very random people. All these people literally pop up out of nowhere and you know they are only in this movie to get killed. This is not something unusual for a movie to do but this movie does this a bit too often. Not just once or twice but it happens all the time, throughout the entire movie.

But it's not like there is much more logic to the story itself. Once you start thinking about it, all of the characters are making some incredibly stupid choices, that are far from likely to ever happen, in the case a real Dinocroc and Supergator would be on the loose one day.

Still the thing that will caught the most attention is how incredibly bad the movie is looking. The special effects are really shocking and it's the kind of stuff basically everybody could do now days, on any random computer. Dinocroc and Supergator look like they have wandered right out of an old Playstation game and they just never look right whenever they have to interact with the environment or when they are attacking or eating random people. You won't believe how fake and horrible it's all looking!

All of the actors seemed also very well aware of what mess they got themselves into. But really, it's not like they were expecting much good from this movie before they singed up for it. A glance at the title would had been enough for them to know that this wasn't going to be an award worthy movie. They all decide to go over-the-top and still have some fun with it, which was probably the best thing to do but it does take you out of the movie even more. Still David Carradine is trying to make something out of his role and he probably is the most professional thing about this entire movie.

Sometimes bad its just bad. Especially when it's not even really trying.

3/10

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