Crazy Bear

If you go down to the woods today you're sure of a big surprise, as mother bear's opened a bag of cocaine and is reaching for the skies, it's made her somewhat volatile and her temper wont abate, if she catches hold she will remould your limbs and amputate.

It's not the worst film about a drug addled bear high as a kite on cocaine that you'll come across, and it probably won't be the last, as variations on a theme are bound to come along in multiform. Quite often amusing, with various appendages and body parts being removed by claw and tooth, fine performances all round and it must have been a fun movie to direct and make.

Come for the "Cocaine" ...stay for the "Bear." I am certain this will be a HUGE hit. They may already be working on sequels. Allow me to suggest:

• Cocaine Bear 2: Mushroom Bear (Trippin' on psilocybin)
• Cocaine Bear 3: Molly Bear (Luvs everybody)
• Cocaine Bear 4: Cannabis Bear (Uncontrollable munchies)
• Cocaine Bear 5: Viagra Bear (self-explanatory)

The title pretty much tells you what kind of movie to expect and delivers as promised. If you expect too much ...then you may be disappointed, but I don't think anyone who is going to see this film is expecting an Oscar-worthy meaningful masterpiece. Yeah, I guess the movie could have been better (definitely not a 10-star film), but compared to other things in this category; I think it's above average and effort was made to produce something entertaining.

I predict the "Cocaine Bear" films will become quite a successful franchise. I'm actually kicking myself right now and thinking: "Why didn't I come up with this first?!"

It's a giant bear that finds drugs and mauls people. Made-for-TV SyFy affair? Nope, a genuine b-movie, name actors and loads of gruesome deaths; and they are gory, believe you me. It's kind of a real kick with the more shocking ones (the ambulance scene screams to mind).

Too many characters walk in and out of this story, which is the one negative I can think of, on the whole; but it's oddly satisfying to watch them go. The real surprise here is, in such a whacked-out movie, there's actually a well-handled theme of a mother protecting her young. I can definitely appreciate this.

I had the benefit of a like-minded audience in the theater, and it's entirely possible that returns will diminish on future rewatches. But in the here-and-now, I enjoyed this quite a bit.

Side note: R. I. P., Ray Liotta.

A bear gets hooked on cocaine, everyone wants the stash, Police, criminals, teenage gangsters, but none want it more badly than the bear.

I almost gave up fifteen minutes in, as I thought it was a straight up apex predator movie, it kind of is, but it's a cocaine bear comedy. Once you realise what you're in for, I urge you to stick with it, as it is genuinely hilarious, it's so funny.

It's amazing to believe that the story is actually inspired by actual, real life events, people's personalities change on drugs, why shouldn't a bear's?

I think the bear looks pretty good to be honest, the ambulance scene looked great, talk about crazy.

Don't expect brilliance, it's too zany for that, but it is a lot of fun.

7/10.

Ummmmm, where do I begin. I didn't watch any trailers or read any reviews. I saw the poster and title and thought, "I'm definitely watching that." After seeing it, I can say with confidence that it's exactly what a movie named Cocaine Bear should be.

Aside from being an extremely fun and outrageous thriller, this movie is hysterical. I was full-volume laughing frequently. So many parts are the perfect combination of memorable and hilarious. It knows exactly what it's doing.

The other thing that made me happy is seeing a studio have the courage to allow the filmmakers to go all out. I compare it to M3gan which was going for a similar tone. But M3gan was toned down to PG-13 so teens could watch. Cocaine Bear is rated R as it absolutely should be. It's not gratuitous but it never feels like it's holding back.

I had a blast with this movie. If the title or premise intrigue you, you will most likely be pleased. (2 viewings, opening Thursday 2/23/2023, 5/20/2023)