Alien Opponent

Seriously, some people are claiming this film is fun. It is "not"! I rarely write reviews, but this film sucked so bad except for a lot of tightly cupped female breasts. If you want to see some nice bodies in the first half of this film, fine, but the cast is left with nothing to work with. It really just sucks so bad that I felt compelled to complain about it. I don't know if I've written any glowing reviews for films, but those stand out in their own with high scores. This thing has a 4.2 currently, and it's lucky it has that. I'm guessing nice female bodies and decent effects got it that score, but unless you've been living in a cave and humor is new to you, this will be a waste.

I'm normally a fan of "so bad it's good", but this is not one of those films. You want "so bad it's good", check out a Fulci flick, or an excellent piece of art like Burial Ground.

Leave this one to people who have insomnia, cause this is a cure. Even beats Paranormal Activity for induced snores per minute.

I have to say I'm honestly surprised the current average mark for this excellent movie is so low, and probably some reviews are so negative.

In a way it's understandable actually, because if many people expected it to be a mega-budget Hollywood blockbuster with a tight plot, dialogs with depth (real or clichéd) and an all-star cast (independence day, Armageddon etc), well then, this movie would definitely be a disappointment.

Well, some people might have been looking for those rare gems, movies with style and a great story but for whatever reason ignored by the establishment (Cube, Cypher, Donnie Darko when it went straight to video because of 9/11 and an airplane crash, despite being one of the best movies ever made).... and again they were in for a disappointment.

So, you might think, why does this lunatic gave it an 8 then? That's actually quite simple, this is a B-movie, shamelessly so, and as such it succeeds in its intent and entertains to no end.

From the very opening, a quiet evening in rednecks-ville with booze, guns and alien ships crashing behind the barn, we're immediately reminded of classic B-movies such as Killer Clowns from Outer Space, Wild Zero, or maybe the pulp fiction that inspired many Tarantino movies. However, while Tarantino tries to invest his silly, gory movies with a serious background that rarely fits, Alien Opponent is a tongue-in-cheek gore fest that entertains us with action, blood, corny dialogs and bizarre deaths all extremely funny.

The movie, as long as a silly, gory B-movie suits your tastes, flashes by in an instant, never boring and always enjoyable. For a bit of mindless fun and gratuitous, silly violence, this movie is a real gem, and in my opinion much more fun than pretentious Hollywood efforts like the recent Sherlock Holmes movie, check it out.

PS I recently watched it again and I had to change the score to a ten. Stupid movie, yes, but really funny. I still think many people just don't get that it's meant to be cheesy and silly. That's what great B-movies are.

I know what you're thinking. "Look at this a#%hole. He gave it a ten. Probably a relative of somebody in the crew, or some local who was cast as an extra". And I perfectly understand. IMDb is bursting at the seems with ÜBER-overwhelming reviews from cast, crew, extras and even producers in "disguise". You know the drill - "honest" opinions in all "objectivity" to increase the ratings.

But the answer is no. I have nothing to do with the making of this film...AT ALL! I simply loved this little gem - and gave it a ten for being "the little film that could".

The story is paper thin, the budget ultra low and the actors are light years away from even being in the vicinity of "mediocre". But still - these guys seem to really know what they're doing. The sound - both mix and editing - PRISTINE. Cinematography and film editing - FLAWLESS! The special effects - CGI, robotics and latex - EXCELLENT! To sum it up - the technical side is, surprisingly enough, grade A. How they pulled it off is beyond me.

What IS certain - the team behind this film LOVES making movies. Call me crazy (as you think I am anyway), but it seems that somebody actually cared and took pride in finishing this little project at the highest level possible with the means that were available. There's a "let's use the few dollars we have to make something really cool"-attitude here. You'll see what I mean, if you ever decide to rent this flick (and throw away your hard earned money). It's all in the details.

As for the story (paper thin...remember?), the creators elaborately underline from frame one that this is not to be taken seriously. Under ANY circumstance. This is MEANT to be over the top. Just sit back, enjoy the ride and the "what the f#%k???"-moments, which are plentiful.

This is probably the best 80 minutes I'll never get back. For sure.

I reactivated my account just to give ya'll some balance. This movie is a stinker ladies and gentlemen. We can call it "the little movie that could" but we won't because that would be a betrayal to little movies that actually can..and do. "Alien Opponent" is a mess. It is slow to begin and if you can get past the hobbled set-up it doesn't get much better. The acting is, of course, so sub par that Rowdy Roddy Piper is the best of the bunch...and there is a bunch, and that's not saying anything positive. Of course acting is the product of script and direction; the script is tired and humorless. The actors do little to escape the clutches of the feeble clichés they've been degraded too. Sigh...I saw this B grade actor type circus act before in a "little movie that could" called "Feast". "Feast" does it so much better and makes the genre proud. This wretched excuse of a movie is a disgrace. On a "positive" note...the alien, at times, is nicely designed. It has enough originality that it deserves a better movie and a better script. The special effects also are nicely done and there's enough gore for a gore-hound to get their fix. You deserve better and better you can do...by far.

From the Chiller network comes Alien Opponent! The movie's loose plot follows a bunch of bumpkins and wackos as they attempt to earn the 100,000 dollar bounty that the junk yard owner is offering for the elimination of the alien who just crash landed in the middle of all the junk.

But if you're watching a movie called Alien Opponent, plot isn't one of your biggest concerns. So step one to having a great time: Turn off your brain! That being said, this movie is good, trashy fun. The blood, at least in the uncut DVD, is plentiful and the body count is through the roof. The movie seems to take an approach toward the value of human life that is, well, non-existent. It has the comedy of a Troma film without going so over the top. The characters are colorful and the pace is fluid.

The only recognizable faces present are Jeremy London (Mallrats) and Roddy Piper. Now, this movie is worth watching just to see Piper in action again as the tough-as-nails priest. Everyone else is relatively new but most perform admirably.

This low-budget gem will never win any awards or show up on your top-ten any time soon but I'll be honest with you: I was never bored, I had no idea what would happen next, and I had fun. When all is said and done, what else do you want?