Les sables de l'enfer

It is interesting how they set these movies in current war zones so that they can double as propaganda. When George Bush was president, these types of movies were typically anti Iraq War propaganda. Now that Barack Obama is president, I guess they are going to be pro Afghanistan War propaganda. You have to watch to understand.

Interestingly, the acting in this film is not awful. I guess you get better actors when you are making a pro Democrat propaganda film. The special effects are not awful either.

But that is pretty much it. The acting is not awful and the special effects are not awful. Once you get past that, it is pretty much just monsters and mayhem. There's a limit to what you can do with monsters, mayhem, and pro Democrat propaganda. There is nothing new about giant worms.

Another SyFy ditty, with suspiciously familiar creatures and plot lines. This one looks like a hybrid mix of Tremors and an assortment of "Marines fight monsters" movies like Aliens.

Giant slinkies with vacuum sweeper tendencies look for quick meals in the Afghan desert. While this week's squad of Marine victims fight with Taliban insurgents, the faceless maws of the Sand Serpents sneak up on both. As per usual, characters are knocked off one-by-one, first with the nameless ones with no lines, then eliminating those with a few lines, finally getting to the top-billing folks.

It would be easy to dismiss this one, but it actually does have its moments. The characters that survive more then the first 20 minutes or so are actually developed somewhat, and the acting isn't bad at all. There's a child in the cast who does especially well. The special effects appear cheap in places, as if done on a home PC. However, since the premise is so bizarre, the hokey effects fit in a weird way. One character who never shuts up has the exact fate you hope for and know is coming sooner or later (and that finally shuts him up, permanently lol).

This one's just for laughs, like the old MST3K flicks.

Sand Serpents (2009)

** (out of 4)

American soldiers are making their way through the Afghanistan desert when they come under fire by the Taliban. The soldiers are eventually captured, tied up and about to be executed when they hear a loud noise and before they know it all the Taliban are dead. It turns out that an earlier explosion had awaken several large worms that are underground and can respond by the noises made on land. This "Creature Feature" advertises giant worms but what we're pretty much got is a rip-off a TREMORS and the weird thing is that the horror elements are actually the least interesting thing. It's uncommon for my girlfriend to watch movies with me and especially films like this but half way through she turned to me and said this wouldn't be too bad if those worms would quit coming up. In many ways she was true because the worms just look too silly and they actually had zero to the film. If someone wants to watch giant worms then TREMORS is masterpiece of horror, monster, comedy and just all around good fun. This film here can't come close no matter how hard the filmmakers try and it's amazing that Universal didn't go after this picture due to the familiar monsters. The stuff with the soldiers dealing with being away from their families and the way they maneuver through their operators were actually the most entertaining thing in the film. I thought there was some nice suspense early in the film when they're walking through the desert just waiting for their targets to come up. One of the soldiers is having a breakdown from not seeing his family and another is hiding some deep secrets. This drama works a lot better than the horror elements and that's weird to say because in most of these monster movies it's the boring melodrama that kills things. The performances aren't too bad with Jason Gedrick leading the way. The special effects are extremely cheap and really don't add anything. I think fans of the genre will probably want to check it out if they must see everything out there but others should just rent TREMORS.

Sand Serpents. No one died in this Syfy Original Movie until the 6 minute mark. Impressive.

A small combat unit overseas that ends up dealing with giant underground worms or snakes.

You're probably thinking what I'm thinking. Dune meets Tremors. Sure, because it's basically just that.

The difference is that the writing is much better than the usual Saturday Night Original fare on Syfy and if you have nothing better to do, it passed the time rather well.

There are some obvious holes in the skit as they skipped some scenes where special effects could have been used, but we know what happened. Who really needs to see a giant snake blow up anyway? My guess, they were saving money.

When the worms feed on Taliban, they kind of reminded me of giant Slinky's with teeth.

Overall, 1-10, I'd say a 5, maybe a 6 if you were drinking.

The writing was better than most of their Saturday Night Original movies, the effects weren't bad but there were holes in some of the cinematography. Who ever edited the final product may have been the one that created some of the disjointed scenes.

The ending for me got lame as I feel there was a much smarter resolution at hand aside from the one that took place. Then again, if he was stupid enough to have taken his course of action aside, then I guess this scene, that was reminiscent of Reign Of Fire, is fine.

You'll know what I mean when / if you see it.

I normally do not trash anyone's films but I have had enough !!!! I watched this film from start to finish !

Let's start with the first point ! These "Soldiers" are not Marines. I have served with both services and there are huge differences besides just uniforms !

Second , This film just cut a lot of their potential audience out because there have been way over a million military members that have rotated in and out of A'Stan,Iraq and other places since the war has started not to mention their family , relatives and friends that know what is and what is BS from their pictures and stories . The "Soldiers" are all "TABBED UP" each with Special Forces tabs and also "RANGER" tabs plus CIBS .

I do know a lot of SF /Group guys that wore beards so that isn't an issue but you don't pick the wimpiest guy to try and pull that off ! Arabs wear a certain Kafeeh ( head dress/wrap around neck) due to a certain meaning ( religious reason , country rulers etc. )

as far as Camera work, weapon work and action could have been a bit better. The monster well that is a SCI FI gig there so I will shut my mouth there ! I won't comment on actors actions and good or bad they do what the Director/Producers and Writer tells them too and I can respect that !

Here is a War veteran's heart felt appeal as someone who loves SCI FI films even campy ones ! Get the Military part right when doing Military based films as if it feels real then the fiction is easy to imagine as a reality ! The best lie that could ever be told is 80% true ! Any questions please feel free to contact me directly !! Cheers! DOC J