Kung Fu Nanny

Before taking the kids to see this, I read through some quick reviews online (such as RogerEbert.com, etc.), and groaned thinking about the 90 minutes or so I'd have to sit watching this...not to mention the annoying ads stuffed down your throat before the trailers even start.

You know, I'm not going to spend time trying to justify why I liked it, laughed at the corny scenes and dialog, slapstick, etc. - but the bottom line is I/we enjoyed it - despite it being a Chan film which usually I'll pass on. How refreshing not to get any propaganda thrown in your face, political innuendos/viewpoints - whatever, which unfortunately you have to bear in even many kids & 'family' films being pumped out these days ... just a basic family comedy which accomplishes its purpose - to simply entertain and nothing else. What's wrong with that, Mr. Ebert? I think you need to stay away from kids' films. Anyone?

So if you decide to see it, make your own judgment. The negative reviews I read before seeing it prepared me to expect the worst....which in turn actually helped it to be a quite a pleasant surprise. Go figure. So far I find it amusing how some of the reviewers on here spent so much time writing in detail how awful the film is, spending the time, space, and effort into dissecting & critiquing it as though it were the latest Coppola or Scorsese project. Who are they writing to? Those expecting a modern cinematic classic (via Jackie Chan) bringing them to standing applause ... or to parents like myself taking their kids out to have a little fun? Right! LOL.

OK, where story is concerned, there's nothing new here. Chan plays a spy on the verge of retirement because he wants to settle down with his girlfriend Gillian (Amber Valetta) and her annoying kids. Now the kids hate Chan and Gillian has to leave for a couple of days in order to spend some time with her ailing father. So who offers to look after the kids? It's not hard to see how clichéd the story is but it is Jackie Chan with his creative stunts who makes this a fun watch. The actor's flair for comedy has become common knowledge and he is as energetic as ever. Moreover, his pairing with the beautiful Valetta is refreshing. Valetta doesn't get much to do other than play the usual girlfriend/divorcée/mom of three but she holds her own. The rest of the cast is forgettable. The child actors are initially very annoying. They sort of grow on you as the film proceeds. Overall, the film is nothing out of the ordinary. It doesn't even compare to a majority Chan's superior works but at best it's an amusing one-time watch.

CIA super agent Bob Ho (Jackie Chan) has been dating Gillian (Amber Valletta) for three months. Her kids Farren (Madeline Carroll) and Ian (Will Shadley) hate him. Little Nora (Alina Foley) thinks that he's a cyborg. He is retiring for Gillian but she doesn't know his secret life. Glaze (George Lopez) is his handler and Colton James (Billy Ray Cyrus) is a fellow agent. His Russian nemesis Anton Poldark escapes from capture. While the kids snoop around in his house, Ian downloads a file from his secret computer. Poldark tracks it down and comes after Bob and the kids.

There is absolutely no chemistry between Jackie Chan and Amber Valletta. The kids have better chemistry with him. Maybe they could have made up a story about him being a secret nanny instead. That's where the comedy is anyways with him as Mr. Mom. The movie almost works with him and the kids. Many comedians have mined that rich vain and Jackie could easily do that too. Also I don't know why he has to wear those glasses. It's not like he's Superman and this is his secret identity. The rest of the movie is a bunch of unfunny cartoon characters. It still has Jackie Chan doing his acrobatic fights. That's impressive at his age. With a few changes, this could have been a passable kids movie.

Bob Ho (Jackie Chan), a very successful CIA spy, is retiring from the business. Although he likes his co-workers, including Colton (Billy Ray Cyrus) and his boss (George Lopez), he want a "normal" life. Cornering a Russian gangster will be his final "hurrah". In truth, Bob has fallen in love with a beautiful divorcée, Gillian (Amber Valletta) and wants to marry her. Trouble is, she has three cantankerous kids, Fallan (Madeleine Carroll), Ian and Nora. Whenever he arrives at their house, they find ways to humiliate him. So, when Gillian has to leave town to attend to a sick father, Bob sees an opportunity for him to "get closer" to the children. He'll babysit for them! After all, as Bob says, he has brought down dictators so he can certainly deal with three kids. Ha! Things go wrong almost immediately. Bob can't cook breakfasts the kids will eat, he has trouble stopping squabbles and he finds bedtime rules are difficult to enforce. Most seriously, Ian downloaded a secret file from Bob's computer and now the Russian badguys are after them! Can Bob manage to dodge bullets as he carpools the kiddies to school? This is a cute family film that should please almost everyone. It has a fine story, a zippy direction, a lot of action, and a nice cast. Chan is, as always, a wonderfully comic performer whose smile can light up the world. His inventive martial arts movements are mirthful, too. The rest of the cast, including Carroll, Cyrus, Lopez, and the others, are great, too. As for the settings, costumes, and production values, they are of the top-shelf variety. Especially beautiful is the suburban home where Gillian's family lives. All in all, everyone in the family will spy a winner here, during a showing, and be pleased as punch when the credits roll at film's end.

All right, I'll admit right off the bat that I didn't expect a high quality movie when I picked this one and I didn't. What I did get was a harmless 90 minutes with Jackie Chan doing what he does best, which was executing his creatively funny stunts to entertaining effect. There's also a filler story of him being a retiring spy who falls for a divorced woman with three kids who, for the most part, don't think much of him since they mainly think of him as a loser. Oh, and some bad stereotypical Russian accents for the male and female villains too. Still, like I said, Chan provides the main reason one would watch and enjoy this movie and it's nice to occasionally see the supporting cast also get in on the action. Besides, any movie where Chan sings a lullaby to the youngest daughter in Chinese and a former resident of my current hometown of Baton Rouge (Johnny Rivers) is heard singing "Secret Agent Man" during the beginning can't be too bad...