Offspring

This is probably how a film by Ed Wood would look nowadays, if he would have made his films at modern standards! Not that there are many technical mistakes, but it takes about 20 minutes to get used to the wooden-handed style of direction and poor acting. If you can stand through that so far, and don't mind very dumb policemen in a movie, the film actually delivers enough gory scenes which might be quite enjoyable for fans of the genre.

Funny was that the Japanese DVD had subtitles for the dialogs between the cannibals, I doubt that there are some in the original version.

Except the taboo of the involvement of children, this film based on Jack Ketchum's novel lacks the intensity of "The Girl Next Door" which I liked much better!

I was going to say that this film was lazy and incompetent independent film-making at its worst. I keep trying to make this point; low budgets needn't matter, and we don't mind the cheap special effects and the limited sets if the film is made with passion and conviction. It doesn't cost anything to get the plot right; just imagination and attention to detail. But that's exactly what this film seems to lack.

An update of the Scottish Sawney Beane legend and transplanting to Maine and the Canadian coast, it has some promising ideas and a couple of effective sequences, but it fails to establish them or develop them properly. What's with the lighthouse keeper? We get a glimpse of a newspaper clipping while the opening credits roll, and one of the characters makes a brief reference during the film, but this history deserved telling properly, even if only narrated by one of the characters, and could have added real mythic power to the plot. But it appears the film-makers just couldn't be bothered.

And then 76 minutes later, barely achieving the minimum respectable length for a feature film, it comes to an abrupt end, with several characters and plot lines unresolved. Please no, don't tell me you're leaving the door open for a sequel. (Adopt appropriate gravelly voice: Offspring 2 – the new generation!) In between, there's a load of confused stumbling around in night-time woods or on stretches of beach that look nothing like the earlier panoramic daytime shots we had of the coastline.

I was going to say all this, but then I glanced up at the technical information in this IMDb entry. 100 minutes, it says. A hundred! But my UK rented copy was only 76 minutes; both the sleeve and the DVD timer confirm it. That's a quarter of the film gone! No wonder the plot seems sketchy, and you can't follow what's happening.

It is entirely incomprehensible. It carries a UK 18 certificate, which is the most serious apart from the 18Rs that can only be bought from licensed sex shops, and I don't imagine they have anything in them that can't be seen for free on the internet. What on earth can the UK censors have found that required 24 minutes of cuts? If it really was originally 100 mins I frankly don't see what the point of releasing the film like this is. At the very least, this review stands as a warning to UK viewers; check the length. If it's the 76 minute version I saw, I'm certainly not recommending it.

Edit: Barely a couple of weeks after posting this, I read in my newspaper that "The Serbian Film" had received between four and five minutes of cuts at the hands of the UK censor, and that this made it the most cut UK film for sixteen years. If that's so, then I was wrong to blame the cut from 100 to 76 minutes on the censor. This makes it all the more baffling. Why would you voluntarily cut your own film to such a skimpy dog's dinner? In any case, it doesn't change my recommendation (or lack of it): just the attribution of blame.

Apparently, some folk from Canada have decided to go all natural and became cannibals. Then, to everyone's dismay, they travelled down the deserted coast in the US. Food's aplenty there, where people like to live in isolated houses, have delicious babies and are surrounded by incompetent police.

That's about it. The movie is gruesome enough and the cannibals believable, if you ignore their origin story completely. I truly believe Pollyanna McIntosh was the reason why this movie didn't suck, as she plays the feral woman tribe leader. I mean, she was lovely even as a dirty violent almost inarticulate woman.

Even from the start, when the movie starts with newspaper clippings, weird music and special effected distribution names, the feeling is that the movie is bad. I blame the director for this. Quite a horror gem this could have been with just a little more attention to detail and a different cast.

The little boy was the only civilised person with a brain in the movie, the rest of the cannibal victims doing nothing but crying oh my god or holy s*** while they are eaten alive. If the premise of the movie was that people can sink to terrible lows, then why conclude that civilised westerners are not capable of directed violent behaviour when they are in trouble? Especially mothers with children, I mean I am afraid of those even in real life. That kind of thinking brought the movie down. That and the directing.

Bottom line: a good horror story (made after a book) with some gruesome graphics, but bad production values.

I hate it when movies start good and only after few seconds they deteriorate in a very bad way. I liked how it started with the man at his door sees a naked girl standing faraway and throws something and leaves. That took my mind in a totally different direction than that the movie turned out to be later.

Anyhow, it is only fair to say that there is one scene, only one scene in the movie that was reallllllllllly good. The scene when the blond girl eats the intestines of the husband and he is looking at his wife and kid and remembering how his day started. He is being eaten in a very savaged way and he is looking back at how beautiful his day started with his wife and beautiful baby girl. This was a very disturbing scene and one that horror fans usually appreciate and seek in horror movies.

Not completely without it's merits, but most of them are buried below a sea of crap. I like Jack Ketchum, his stories do have an extra something. The script is let down by some poor acting and hilariously awkward moments that just don't fit. You can set up a character as a slimeball without such a heavy handed pervert/hitchhiker scene. The acting from the offspring/wild people is comic at best. One boy jumps into shot going "Hee hee hee", like some pantomime witch. The gore is done rather well, and there were nice parts, such as the first kill. It made a nice and chilling change to see a scene not played for jumps, but for the awkward silence. Perhaps worth a watch, as it is short.