Quantum Apocalypse

This is a TV movie so honestly, I didn't expect much, but it was not bad. It is Sci-Fi, drama, and adventure mix kind of thing. I found it on YouTube for free. Pretty good deal.

There is really no other way for me to express what this movie is than this: A disaster movie where the only real disaster is the movie itself.

When reading the other reviews of this movie I thought to myself "Well, when a movie is bad enough I can usually laugh at it for being so bad and have a good enough time watching it anyway" and so I decided to see this with my own eyes. I implore you, dear reader, NOT to repeat my mistake! There is not enough alcohol, nitrous gas or low standards on the surface of the entire planet for anyone to find any enjoyable aspect in this movie at all.

Alphabetical order of flawed elements. Just because I want everyone to understand how bad this is.

Actors - The best ones are simply bad, the rest are horrible. Some of them at least make a bit of an effort.

Cameras and angles - Static shooting almost all the way, but it's actually not that bad compared to when the cameras move. In one scene where a character is driving, you'd think they bolted a $50 VHS camera to the hood and had him actually drive around with that.

Computer effects - You can easily spot them, if the graphic Ultra Low quality doesn't tip you off, the absence of the laws of physics will. Many movies from the 90's had Better computer generated effects. Even some of the Bad movies.

Other effects - I could not find a single one that was just slightly low-budget or just had a mild flaw. Every last one was flat out bad.

Script - Someone should be unemployed by now...

The rest - You probably already get the picture.

Summary: Gather your neighbors and have the most stupid one write the script, the most incompetent one manage effects, the ones with the worst poker faces be the actors and finally let someone with impaired motor skills handle the camera and you will make a masterpiece compared to this. Unfortunately I'm not joking.

I would generally agree that the dialogue and acting was of a rather dismal standard for this movie, but then again, that's what it is -- a low budget film, without the resources or aspiration to do better.

I kept watching because of the extraordinary acting of the man who played the uncle with what appears to be a variant of Asperger's syndrome. I think it's the actor Rhett Giles, but can't confirm, as during the film his name (and that of too many other characters) was mentioned too few times to even establish his identity for the casual viewer.

I was very impressed with this actor's ability and would like to see more. He had the mannerisms down to a tee and the scriptwriters certainly knew the aptest lines to supply him with.

I thought the actor playing the mayor of the town, the brother of the character named above, did a competent job with the dialogue given him. I thought he had more on-screen presence than the man chosen to play the president.

The young man who played his son also showed some charisma, maybe it was just his dark good looks, but I am sure he will find other roles.

I was surprised and pleased to see Stephanie Jacobsen, an Australian who no longer sounds like one. But she's had significant roles in The Sarah Connor Chronicles and Battlestar Galactica, so I'm not sure why she would agree to sign on for a project that must have had so little funding behind it.

Despite the loss of 90 minutes when I could have been doing something else, I'm still glad I saw the slightly strange uncle character -- whoever played him (if it was Rhett Giles), he deserves an honourable mention.

I am the type of guy, who can watch Commando with Arnie and enjoy it, as well as watch An Andalusian Dog by Luis Bunuel and enjoy it too. I like great movies but time to time I enjoy bad ones, even the movies that are UBER-BAD, in "so bad that it's good" sense.

This one is not the case. You will actually feel the physical pain while trying to watch this thing.

Why didn't I turn off the screen after halfway through? Well, to be honest, I just HAD to know how far the idiocy can go.

Now about flaws...

1. When you have budget of 2,5 lemons, just DON'T, don't try to make another 2012 movie. (2012 was bad enough even with it's big bag budget). Effects were not only horrible in technical way, but most of them were making no sense whatsoever.

2. It's not necessary to find a star for your movie. There are lots of talented people who can act and are not stars. In fact, I like bad acting, cause It makes me laugh. But in this film, you will not see even that. Except some of the actors who OVERACT terribly, you can't find ANY acting at all.

3. Scientific background of the story: OK... how many times do I have to use the word nonsense? In fact, transsexual giraffe, trying to take over the world with the help of green cockroaches, sounds more believable than the bubble that characters use here to justify the existence of this rubbish.

4. Characters. Well, you just CAN'T swallow it. In fact I think that's where the genius of the director of this movie is hidden. It is really, really hard to create characters, more unbelievable than the ones in this movie. Movie makers just set the milestone in that direction I think.

5. Plot. Well, at least I can't say that there were many plot holes. Because, to have a plot-hole, first of all you need to have a plot. Does this film have one? NO!

Overall! Terrible, unwatchable movie!

Acting was OK, the plot was survivable if week. The mix between set,CGI and model was a bit dodgy, but worst was the sound production - I kept missing little bits of dialog. I am also not sure if it was the direction or the production (I am not a film buff), but I did find I had to keep piecing together what was going on, when I felt this should have been given to me by either (both) production & direction.

Biggest let down - name of the movie - Quantum erm... - hu - nothing to do with it. And the box cover showing a large bridge getting smashed - nothing so dramatic happened. Still with a budget of $2.5M, not such a bad job, if you are not a B-movie fan, don't watch this movie, but for me it hit the sweat-spot.