- Alex: [narrating] I got the house, the furniture, his unpaid bills. But Tom got all our friends.
- Nikki: [to support group] So; what about you? Any one else here ever fuck a retard for a dress?
- Marsha: [quiet pause] Yeah; I once let my husband put his penis in my anus for a Cartier necklace.
- Nikki: We're exterminators.
- Harmony: Ah. Don't you guys use chemicals for that?
- Stella: No, actually you know, with everyone going green now, we came up with a more holistic approach.
- Nikki: Just cuz you're gonna kill something, doesn't mean you have to harm the environment.
- [first lines]
- Interviewer: So, where do you want to begin?
- Alex: Where things always begin. In bed.
- Stella: I'm Stella and I use my car as a weapon.
- Alex: You want me to drive?
- Stella: Yeah, if you drive then I can drink.
- Stella: [to Nikki] I want to take up smoking so I can have skin like yours.
- Alex: I just did what anyone would do if they woke up and found a dead hooker in their bed. I called my friends.
- [last lines]
- Distraught Woman: He took everything. Even my credit card. Then I get this bill - he put her new boobs on my Visa!
- Stella: [off to the side] You know, we're officially out of business.
- Nikki: Yup, officially we are.
- Stella: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
- Nikki: I follow you.
- Stella, Nikki: [they march over to the distraught woman]
- Nikki: Alex, please...
- Stella: Oh, come on. Really Alex? We, we need you.
- Alex: That's what every fixer loves to hear. That someone needs them.
- Alex: [flash forward] I wasn't doing anything wrong. I was just doing my job, ABC was my client. I was like Switzerland, or the military. Don't ask, don't tell. Right?
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