The Gardener

I am having a really bad night with films; having just finished watching my 3rd absolutely load of rubbish film in a row...this one, 'RELENTLESS (2021) and a swedish film called, 'RED DOT' (2021).

The acting in 'The Gardener' was stiff (due to an awful script) and the fight choreography rates as some of the worst I have ever seen...and I have seen a lot! Charles Bronzi (the headliner star) - the Charles Bronson lookalike - is making films akin to Charles Bronsons, "DEATH WISH" series of films from director Michael Winner. The difference is he doesn't have that same on screen presence that Bronson had and the films are badly scripted/directed rubbish etc! Gary Daniels is the other star and as per usual, with his screen appearances, he was dull and unimpressive. He is a well known Martial Artist and has made films of that ilk for many years now. I have no idea what he is really like as a fighter - as I have never seen him fight in real life - but he is an extremely boring fighter in his films; with no originality or decent onscreen style whatsoever.

The result of both parties being in this film is therefore a guaranteed tedious load of dross!

If you have nothing to do go and find something else to do...but don't watch this if you are needing some good cinematic entertainment!

If you ever enjoyed watching Charles Bronson at work, you will enjoy this. With the lead actor, Robert Bronzi, I believe that is what they wanted to think. My opinion, it was worth watching as a DVD rental. Go for it!

Most movies, however abysmal, have at least one redeeming feature...not this one...this is a masterclass in crap moviemaking from start to finish.

I can only assume it was made the day before the director arrived on set...they made a mistake and released the first rough rehearsal as the finished product.

The father looks and dresses like a crackhead...the mother a baglady...the gardener a monosyllabic moron....the bad guys pathetically stereotyped.

The set appears to be a derelict 'stately home' with matching garden.

The 'action' scenes choreographed by 5 year old kids.

The 'script'....lol....lol.

This production was simply lazy, which is a shame since a decent amount of work obviously went into it. The bad guys' interactions were ridiculous, the fights slow and wooden, and the "pregnant" woman had a lumpy tummy that wasn't even round (and she was clearly breathing as she lay there after being shot in the head). Fun that the gardener looks like Charles Bronson, but that's about all this movie had going for it.

Grief! Some of the reviewers here clearly didn't experience the home video boom of the 80s. When you rented a 'bad' film you watched it to the end, sometimes twice. Is this as bad as some of those? No.

It's low budget for sure, but you have to admire how hard everyone is trying, I've seen worse actors in bigger films.

The first fight, in the garden cracked me up, it goes from someone being hit with a shovel to a martial arts display.

In summary: it's a low budget, low rent revenge movie with some guy that looks like Charles Bronson (for those that know who that is), set in the English countryside. Comical double takes and a dude that yells, 'she saw my face!' a lot.