Tyrannosaurus Azteca

With nothing better to do I decided to check out "Aztec Rex" (as it was being billed) for the hell of it.

The silly story might have played better if the dinosaur effects were convincing. They actually looked like animatics (those rough designs that artists later use to finish the CGI effects, adding more details, smoother movements, etc.) Absolutely awful-looking dinosaurs, which is the only reason you'd probably want to sit through this anyway.

The one redeeming factor was the lovely Dichen Lachman as Ayacoatl. She kept my interest; if only the budget had been ramped up and some convincing dinosaurs could have been used.

Disappointing. At least the cast and crew got a free trip to Hawaii, where the movie was filmed.

A very clever movie, using the old style movie plot, that the writer and director team very subtly, and very craftily, made their point.

The movie is an old style Science Fiction adventure. Cortez leads six men on an expedition into the Aztec world. Cortez is a good choice, because he is known as one of the less ruthless, but still successful conquistadors. He certainly had more civility than Pizarro.

Along the way, they meet a tribe, and two T Rexes. They are out for conquest, so they decide they will conquer the tribe instead of the T Rexes.

But the tribe gets the better of them, and a priest intervenes on their behalf. It isn't unusual for a Spaniard to be stranded or shipwrecked near a coastal community, and such was the case for this priest, who was deemed interesting enough by the tribe to take in, and he taught them the language of Cortez.

The characters are very real and identifiable. You genuinely care about them. It is well written and directed. The T Rexes lumber, as some scientists still believe. It is only recently that some scientists claim that rexes were speedy, but these are scientists just trying to get their names into print. Good Science dictates that it takes an incredible amount of energy to give speed to that weight. It's like trying to motor a two ton truck as opposed to a motorcycle. The lumbering T Rex still makes more sense.

The characters are well done. Cortez is much like the leader of the treasure seekers in "The Jungle Book", the one with Sabu in it. He is a decent man, who cares about other people, and has humanity, but still wants the treasure. The priest is a very three dimensional character. The romantic two leads are also believable, especially for the times, since they have never seen movies, and don't know what a modern character is supposed to be like. They behave much as you would find credible for the times.

But the chief point of the movie is that it attacks all other horror and Science Fiction movies in a very subtle way. It comes with the idea in the title I gave this, and I wouldn't want to spoil it. Nearly all horror and Science Fiction movies made in the last forty years indicate that some characters are "divinely" above any physical weakness, and that if you're evil enough, you cannot become weak. This movie cleverly attacks that notion.

I LOVE these Sci-Fi Channel movies. But usually when I say they are "good", what I mean is that they were bad, but in an entertaining way. But this, this turned my whole world upside down. It was actually... almost... sort of... gosh, kind of good (and I don't mean 'bad' this time).

Well first, let me get this out of the way - I think it is only fair to rate a movie independently of what it is about - if someone wants to make a movie about googly eyed pet rocks, you should then rate it based on how well they accomplished what they set out to do - not give it a 1 just because it's about googly eyed pet rocks. So in that light, realize that yes, this is about Spanish explorers meeting Aztecs who worship a dinosaur who has apparently survived for millions of years in their valley. But no, it doesn't deserve a bad rating just because of the ridiculous plot.

So with that said, the movie easily deserves an 8 because of its pretty decent special effects, pretty decent acting, pretty decent story, and highly entertaining result. The key for the viewer is being able to get past the silly premise - if you can do that, I guarantee you will enjoy yourself.

I was prepared to hate AZTEC REX. Stupid title, stupid plot, completely unbelievable. Charitably called a B-movie, this is one of the many schlocky pictures released via the Sci-Fi Channel in America. Others have been absolutely god-awful, so why shouldn't this one be? From the beginning, things don't look good. The T-Rex is inevitably brought to life with some pretty diabolical CGI effects that make the BBC's WALKING WITH DINOSAURS look like an authentic nature documentary. The acting is wooden – there's no point trying to deny it. When the highlight is an ex-NEIGHBOURS actress wandering around in a bikini for the film's duration, you know you're in trouble. With a bunch of ex-TV actors and actresses attempting to convincingly portray Aztec warriors and Spanish Conquistadors, there's not really much hope, even from the start. The low budget and cheap look dooms this one from the outset.

But – wait a second. This film has something that most B-grade flicks don't: it has a sense of humour. And hey, it's actually quite entertaining to watch, albeit in a so-bad-it's-good way. Sure, it's a cheesy combination of at least three movies: JURASSIC PARK, APOCALYPTO and KING KONG, but somehow, the combination works. Instead of making us wait an age for the monster to appear, as in the old monster flicks, this one introduces us to the T-Rex from the start as he chews a guy's leg off. That's something else: the surprisingly graphic blood 'n' guts effects. They come thick and plentiful, with actors losing limbs, intestines and spraying arterial blood across the screen. The thing about the gore is that it isn't repulsive as in something like HOSTEL. Instead, it's colourful and amusing and left me looking forward to the next poorly animated death.

In the end, AZTEC REX is a success. I loved it, a lot more than many A-list Hollywood blockbusters. I was enthralled, I had a laugh, I had a really good time. And I can rest the success of this delightful movie on one man's shoulders alone: director Brian Trenchard-Smith. This man has been making B-movies for over thirty years and shows no signs of slowing down. He was responsible for TURKEY SHOOT, one of my all time favourite 'nasties', as well as the fun crime flick DAY OF THE ASSASSIN. Trenchard-Smith knows his genre inside out and I think he's a man who you can guarantee will give you a fun time. Leave your expectations at the door and give AZTEC REX a chance!

This movie threw me at first in the way it's put together.

First I thought it is a Mexican movie, then I find out that it's Sy-Fy original. I thought it was filmed in Mexico, then I find that it's filmed in Oahu Hawaii (The same ranch where they filmed the "Wind Talker"). I thought the girl was Maxican, and I find that she's Tibetian-Australian. One thing I was right was that the guy looked Hawaiian, and he was.

The reason why I thought the movie was Mexican was that it was about the level of quality of average Mexican movie. It is kind of bad even for a Sy-Fy channel special. What I like about the film is that it's shot quite beautifully. And the actors are actually pretty good looking.

So despite the low budget feel, it only reinforces the fact that these actors are actually worth looking at. The girl looked like Pocahauntus for real.

Everyone says this movie is bad, but for a movie that's supposed to bad, it's sure getting lot of views. So somebody must be liking it.

I thought it was a great idea to combine T-Rex with the Aztecs and the conquistadors.

I was never bored while watching this movie, although it was shockingly low quality in production. I can't say that for many of the more higher quality production movies, so at least the script was acceptable in this movie.

Considering that Japanese anime studios routinely outputs a high quality program at about this budget range, I'm not sure if 2.5M for this movie is justified, but it was an interesting movie to watch in many different ways.