Wedding Slashers

And you thought your significant other's family was weird? Wedding Slashers will make you think twice about ever saying "I do." It is reminiscent of past horror titles such as 'Deadly Friend' and 'Friday the 13th.' It is a classic slasher film that features characters with names like 'Sock Monkey' and 'The Mortician.' You may laugh at first but trust me, these guys will freak you out. This is a quencher for the blood-thirsty horror/slasher fan that needs to see gore, gore and more gore. It's not all slash and gash either - Wedding Slashers is chock-full-of one-liners and will give you more than just a chuckle. You're going to need to see this one to believe it.

This is a throwback. There was a time when horror films were gritty, exploitive, funny, nasty, and had moments so bad they were good. And boobs. They showed BOOBS! If you're not expecting Devil's Rejects or the Grudge or any other modern and slick horror, you will find Wedding Slashers watchable. "Wedding Slashers" is a direct descendant of those trashy, low budget 70s horror films. Catchy title, cute girls, nudity, blood, a big old knife on the artwork.

The movie opens with a flashback. A bride and a groom with not a nickel to rub together are heading to Vegas, running away from home to get married. They don't make it. They are exterminated by a gas mask, cloak wearing, Darth Vader sounding killer. He spouts some nonsense about love and then abruptly splits the brides head open like a watermelon. You practically see the seeds. Moving forward in time we meet another Bride. Every man she's every loved has died a mysterious death. Without ruining the end, the fate of her fiancé hangs in balance. Will the mystery be solved and will our love birds tie the knot before the bloody finale? The plot is simple. The performances are raw but more often than not, good. This production value is minimal, the technical aspects – besides a nice 5.1 surround mix, there are none. The gore is sometimes shocking, sometimes campy, and usually entertaining.

The charm in this is that a bunch of first timers (At least their previous credits don't add up to much) have made a little movie that pretty much works. You can see the missteps, but they are never boring or offensive. I would have liked to see more of the strippers at the bachelor party. Of course, it would have been nice to see more of the bride. There's a shower scene and for some reason, they don't show below her shoulders!! She's too cute to keep covered up. But despite those major drawbacks, Wedding Slashers is a keeper.

I watch a lot of horror movies and lately there really is no shortage of them to see. But this was a horrible movie. The blood and violence being the only thing that made it worth while. The acting was beyond high school bad, there were a couple scenes that you could tell the actors were just improving (poorly) and I never notice costumes, but they were some of the worst I've ever seen it this movie. Googles and a face shield? What the hell? I never turn off a movie no matter how bad it is but I almost did for this one. Who ever has there name attached to this movie in any way should probably be lined up and shot.

But that's just my opinion.

The timing seemed off in this movie.

Lip Sync was off as was some of the dialog and action. And there were weird cutaways from slasher moments. Climax music came in late after a killing.

EXTERIOR: NIGHT Two redneck brothers talked about their toes in one scene. One brother said he had three toes and took off his shoes to count them. The redneck discovers he has five toes. The hero sneaks in from behind to stab him. He should have CUT two of his toes off and said, "You were right the first time, you only have three", whilst he is screaming in horror. There were lots of these "missed moments".

Lots of missed moments created a dull and uninspiring movie. The movie was shot on video, probability for a horror film festival like DARK CARNIVAL, it need more verve. Some OK bloody scenes but was it a comedy or horror movie. You can do both, but it helps if Sam Raimi directs.

The Bride was emotionally stoic throughout. Could use some banging action with her. Lighting and sound track were good, tho. And yes, there were boobs.

Jenna (Jessica Kinney) is a young woman that has lost every man she loved since she was very young. Now she has encountered Alex (Ross Kelly) and they decide to move in together and get married. She has told him that she lost her parents but in the church, she glances at her parents and she decides to call off the wedding. She asks to her friends to leave the church and she discloses the story of her family to Alex. Meanwhile all their friends are murdered by killers and Jenna tells that they are members of her family. Why are they killing her friends?

"Wedding Slashers" is a trash amateurish slash that could have been a good black comedy since there are many funny moments. However the director Carlos Scott seems to be lost between the comedy and the slasher genre. The story is nonsense but could have been a funny film. My vote is four.

Title (Brazil): Not Available