Protection rapprochée

I have yet to read a single positive review for this film anywhere, most people say it's clichéd, predictable, and stupid with a done-to-death plot, and it kinda is, but that dosen't mean it's not a hell of a lot of fun. Palinteri does a pretty good job, though he's played this type of role so many times he could do it in his sleep, and Schweiger's not much of an actor, so it's fortunate that he dosen't try and stretch himself too much here, the rest of the cast is pretty average. When it comes to action however, this film really delivers, Gerry Lively certainly lives it up to his last name, as the actions scenes are indeed lively and entertaining and they easily make up for the weak story and mostly average performances, all in all i'd say it's a 6 out of 10.

Not going to waste more time on this, just to say it is genuinely one of the worst films I've seen.

18 minutes in we get the dramatic uttering 'This matter needs to be dealt with swiftly, and with the utmost urgency'. That kind of sets the scene for the quality of dialog to come. And the acting is worse.

If you read this review before seeing the movie, save yourself.

I'm afraid to say I watched most of it, but only in that 'watching a slow motion train wreck' kind of way. It was genuinely bad. So bad you cant look away.

And now the review helper says my review is too short. How much more of my life must I waste on this horror?

This is a movie about a bodyguard who has to protect somebody but can't do a worthwhile job of it.

Like most action movies of this sort, it loses logic about 20 minutes in.

The bad guys are too bad for their own good, but they look good in fancy suits and with nice weaponry.

The good guys are too dumb - tough but dumb.

Now, if I had to relocate a witness, I would not take them to places that would be popular or hot or known to anybody.

I would throw them in back of a beat-up car, wearing rags and take them to some place that nobody would ever think of.

They would listen to me or I would bust their teeth.

However as in every other witness relocation/protection movie - logic is misplaced for what is supposed to be a story.

The performances are bad, the story is bad and the action is also bad.

However for a comedy, it's not too bad...if you want a little bit of action with your funny.

With a whole bunch of useless and needless locations, scenes, action sequences and dialog as well as major plot holes - this could be one of the lost comedies that you may find interesting.

The nightclub scenes are pretty interesting...walking around in ski masks in a nightclub and nobody notices.

Brandishing weaponry across a dance-floor and nobody moves until gunfire is sprayed.

Yep, it's the little things that can make a movie good or it's the little things that can make a movie horrible.

This does the latter.

I'm a basic fella, I see Chazz Palminteri, Til Schweiger and a phook off Baretta on the poster and I watch! 'Body Armor' (2007)is an old school, Teflon-tough, cheese-loaded, pleasingly 90s flavoured actioner. Handsomely lithe Til plays darkly brooding retired bodyguard John Ridley, who, through a crude twist of fate is hired to protect his arch nemesis Lee Maxwell (Chazz Palminteri), a merciless contract killer seeking redemption. Outside of the surprisingly muscular action, my main fascination with 'Body Armor' is the fearlessly formulaic text which genuinely appears to be fashioned entirely from recycled dialogue!!!! With the sole, glaring omission of 'I'm getting too old for this!' the purloined prose has been brazenly lifted from some of the more prosaic examples of Seagal's oeuvre! So I would strongly advise against embarking upon a drinking game generously toasting each heroically hackneyed exchange, as you will be mortally medicated midway through the first act, mayte!

If you still appreciate the kinetic, hyper-stylized shenanigans of a superfluously sleek, Olivier Megaton-helmed EuropaCorp style shoot 'em up, Gerry Lively's boisterously Baretta-blasted 'Body Armour' is well worth a shot! The ravishing Barcelona backdrop and dynamically driving score by Jose Mora are the film's more notable highlights. Objectively, 'Body Armor' is not without its flaws, and both actors are plainly aware of that fact, but, personally, I enjoy this kind of barnstormingly escapist brain-melt to noisily distract myself from an increasingly monotonous reality, which it does rather well. As an aside, I could see powerhouse director Isaac Florentine fashioning a zesty upgrade of this with a menacingly grizzled JCVD as the remorseful ex-assassin Lee, and pyrotechnical pugilist Scott Adkins as his fleet-fisted antagonist Ridley.

This movie is a waste. A waste of time, a waste of money and a waste of the actors involved.

Chazz Palminteri has delivered a few really good performances in his career, a few excellent ones and Til Schweiger while not the greatest actor can usually do a well enough job.

Not in this movie, with this script, with this dialogue.

One more thing, one of the other reviewers has called this a typical Euro-Movie and that is complete nonsense.

If any, it is an untypical Euro movie as it has no aspirations at all.

Anyone who has any knowledge about European cinema would laugh at a classification like that.