House of Payne

Words cannot capture just how bad this show really is. It probably sets black culture back 50 years. Horrible writing, impossibly predictable stereotypical characters, and actors that look to be mailing it in make me wonder who at TBS could have possibly thought this was a good idea.

I won't try to summarize any particular plot, since some may view that as a type of validation. Simply put, there is nothing redeeming about this atrocity. Even the laugh track doesn't find this show funny.

TBS advertises the Paynes as "the Huxtables meets the Bunkers." They are neither. They are neither funny nor socially relevant. If I were Bill Cosby, I'd sue TBS for defamation.

Memo to TBS:

(1) Cancel this show IMMEDIATELY; (2) Fire the executive that green-lighted this debacle and ensure that he or she never works in entertainment again; and (3) Destroy all evidence, scripts, recordings, etc. proving that this show existed.

Tyler Perry's House of Payne is a fantastic show! I love how the actors are horrible and have no sense of comedic timing! I love how the writers write awful plots with awful jokes to fill in the 20 minutes the show is on the air! I love how the characters are paper thin, stereotypical, and just flat out annoying! I love how this show is crap! My first paragraph was a thick dose of sarcasm.

I feel sick when I watch this show. For those of you who picked it up, I have stopped with the sarcasm (I'm guessing its the people who don't find House of Payne funny, because any person with a spec of intelligence couldn't find it funny). How in the world Arrested Development got canceled and this didn't is beyond me (although that may be a blessing in disguise).

Everything I said in my first paragraph is what is wrong with the show. It's just a pure, awful program. How it can be "the number one sitcom", as billed by TBS, is beyond me. Is it because more people nowadays watch television? Is it because people fall asleep instantaneously when this show comes on and they can't change their channel? Someone, please, fill me in, because this show is garbage.

Another complaint, and this isn't necessarily about the show, but more about Tyler Perry. Why does everything have to be "Tyler Perry's this" or "Tyler Perry's that". Its very annoying, I don't really care who does it. The only difference is when it's a group or something, like Monty Python or National Lampoon. When a single person does it, its just really arrogant and unimpressive. He's riding the wave of his past successes.

I've never seen Tyler Perry's movies or his plays. I have seen his other show, Meet the Browns, and it is, somehow, worse than this show. But I caught a few minutes of one of his movies (don't remember which one) and I thought it was marginally better than the show. I, personally, think he is ruining television, but that's just my opinion.

It doesn't matter what race I am, I can "get" things, but just in case someone wants to slander me or use this against me, I'm white. Big deal, if something is funny, I'll laugh. I can appreciate "black" comedy. I love Bill Cosby, The Cosby Show, Richard Pryor, Cleavon Little, Gregory Hines, Eddie Murphy, Phil Lamarr, Tim Meadows, Kat Williams, and Dave Chappelle. Tyler Perry could learn a thing or two from those guys.

TBS needs to stick with reruns and stop trying to create and original show. They're all horrible.

If you're confused by my title, let me explain. If the unnecessarily drawn-out conversations immediately got to the point, the 25 minute shows would last about 10 minutes. Hence, a 10 minute story told in 25 minutes.

There are a lot more reasons for my 3 stars, but I don't feel like writing a book. Let's just say that there is no comedy in this comedy.

Don't know why this show is still on? It's not funny at all.

I've been reading the user comments and threads on the message board for a week even though I hadn't seen the show yet. I just found the posts amusing.

I finally saw the show last night and unfortunately for Tyler Perry and TBS...these posts have been more amusing than the show. It's just not funny. Not only because the jokes aren't any good but the jokes aren't delivered well either. The actor playing Calvin tries the hardest to sell a joke but even then he oversells it. Not even because of his acting, mainly because the jokes are so bad that if you try to sell it you'll easily oversell it.

Literally everything about this show is weak. The writing, the directing, the acting, the blocking, the camera work, the editing.

Throughout the entire show I noticed how something was getting in the way of the storytelling and the jokes. Even the damn laugh track got in the way. The crowd noise was used inappropriately and sometimes the wrong crowd noise was used. They'd use a "Oooooo" when there should've been laughter.

It's a bad Fresh Prince of Bel Air. That was a show that tackled subject matter that the black community could relate to but didn't do it in a tacky, over-dramatic or sometimes over simplistic way like "Tyler Perry's House of Payne" does. AND it was actually funny because the actors could act and the lead had star power.

There was ONE time during either of last night's episode that an actual joke occurred.

In correcting his wife's word usage, Curtis says, "But them weren't panties. Them were big assed draws!" I didn't laugh but at least it was an actual joke.

The moment after a joke like this occurs is the moment a Bill Cosby or a Will Smith would've taken hold of the scene. They'd run with the joke and make the scene funny and in turn, better. In LaVan Davis' incapable hands, however, the scene fell flat.

Another reason for this was poor writing. Punchlines weren't set up well enough. Silly gags were used to get a cheap laugh. They'd look for a joke in the wrong places.

Explain to me why an anger management coach would look like Richard Simmons. That was a cheap sight gag that didn't make sense...and wasn't funny.

That's not the only way the writing got to me last night. I found one episode to be homophobic. When Curtis sees his nephew's son with a tutu around his neck he runs to pray because he thinks the boy is gay. Heaven forbid someone be gay! Spout out any Bible verses you want, it is what it is. And it was homophobic. That's an awfully polarizing thing to have on a show that, according to the show's defenders, is for the community. Stuff like that only serves to break up our communities.

Seriousness like that last point aside, the show is just plain bad. In every way. I'm trying to figure out why on Earth TBS ordered 100 episodes. That's 5 seasons worth! 5 seasons??

I don't see how they'll be able to justify CJ's staying with them for much longer than a season but they have to because it's the whole premise of the show. It's the reason for it's namesake. I know they tried to address that last night when CJ said, "I can't afford a new place. I have a mortgage on a house I don't even live in."

Ummmm, get a second job? Maybe you should've gotten that insurance?

This isn't a good enough reason for CJ and his kids to live with his uncle for 5 years.

And there isn't a good enough reason for me to watch this terrible show again unless I want to see how a show can be this bad.