Illegal Aliens

Anna Nicole Smith was never going to a big star in perhaps the way we few stars of a certain stature.

What she had going for her was there for all to see, and to be honest who actually thought that she had any worthwhile acting talent? Of course when it comes to her final movie, namely 'Illegal Aliens' I suddenly had a change of heart.

I first saw the trailer on the same disc as that most often talked about debacle 'Transmorphers' and while I don't want to veer to far from my train of thought, 'Transmorphers' was indeed a very unsatisfying way to spend my ninety plus minutes in front the tube.

If I were to be honest, I couldn't stop watching the trailer for Anna Nicole's movie.

Now although she headlined the movie, star power was in abundance to back her up, when I say star power, we really should realise that this is a straight to DVD B movie.

That being said, with the presence of Chyna aka Joanie Lauer and in a very brief cameo as a mob boss John James, the film was never going to lack in the acting stakes.

Perhaps mentioning acting and Chyna in the same breath really should be taken too seriously but she really did steal the vast majority of the movie as the tough talking allbeit possessed by something not of our world tough and deadly femme.

I guess like most movies though, the best bits were to be found within the trailer, isn't that always the way, but as mentioned in my summary, funny in parts, and this is all down to the participation of Anna Nicole, who it must be said, although ditching her glamorous look, really did look rather attractive in her ditzy fashion outfits, as well as and this is of major importance, the sever overacting of Chyna.

But when it comes to a cohesive storyline structure, the narrative was all over the place, but hey, with a storyline as outrageous as this, perhaps this was the best way to approach it.

If I was asked what I could compare this movie to? when watching it, having watched many a B movie down through the decades, the two that came to mind where 'Assault Of The Killer Bimbos' & 'Earth Girls Are Easy' of course within the movie the most obvious reference belongs to 'Charlie's Angels'.

Edgewood Studios might not be The Asylum, but at least they can deliver a more entertaining film complete with a humorous script, some decent acting for a movie of this nature and of course the main course ingredient, pretty girls to look at, and that does include the late Anna Nicole Smith.

My rating is 6/10 and that

So, I rented this shortly after the passing of Anna Nicole Smith, who I admit, I love. Loved her show, loved watching her be crazy, loved how beautiful she was. So many people had told me how funny this movie was. It got decent reviews on here, and even the guy standing next to e in line at the video store told me it was one of the funniest movies he had ever seen. Okay. I thought this might be a great way to pass a Thursday night at home with a bowl of popcorn. Wrong. I just din't get it? Why is this funny? I LIKE stupid-funny movies, but this one was lost on me. Yes, I realize it starred Anna Nicole Smith and Chyna, but I heard that it was originally intended as a vehicle for Helen Mirren and Dame Judi Dench.

Unfortunately Illegal Aliens(2007)does not work at all.Since the cast has not a director,who is able to take seriously the directing,perhaps he was not the only person who is responsible for this irritatingly bad movie.(by far)Lot of people feels like the producers are also had the problem:how to make move,and speak people those real talent was lost when they become enough rich to feel like they are in safe.The script is also flat just like dialogs,but we know this was direct,this is why I have to say this movie will not satisfy people with good,or normal taste,but I have to tell you,as a big thrash fans like me,also this time not recommend this movie.

The directors next movie he made after this was Craptastic. No really, that was the title of the film. I think that says everything you need to know about this absolute howler of a movie.

There are many problems with this film but I will start with the two lead actors. China and Anna Nicole Smith in her last role. Neither can act worth a lick. And both are now dead from drug and drink overdoses. Something that one can well believe by watching Illegal Aliens.

I can't find anything good to say about it. Well maybe it doesn't take itself too seriously is about the only thing I can think.

Best avoided.

"Charlie's Angels" meets "Men In Black", says the tagline on the DVD cover of "Illegal Aliens", and for once they got it right: like CA this movie has a trio of hot female crime-fighters (in this case, aliens in human form), and like MIB their mission is to protect the Earth from aliens with evil ambitions (add a bit of "Superman II", and you pretty much have the plot mix). Of course this is primarily meant to be a spoof, but too often the humor is forced and stale: fart jokes have never been and will never be very funny, and even the satirical and "breaking the fourth wall" jokes (such as a "Villain Monologue Timer" that appears on the screen, or the director of the film yelling "cut" and talking to the actors) have been done before, and better (remember that "Dead Body Counter" in "Hot Shots Part Deux"?). In her last film appearance, Anna Nicole Smith plays the lightheaded, childlike agent: it's an one-note performance, but she hits that one note well and she's pretty adorable. Joanie Laurer AKA Chyna chews the scenery to the 9th degree, which can get pretty tiresome, but at least she's still in good shape - if she ever wanted to return to wrestling, she looks like she could do it. As Anna's fellow agents, Lenise Sorén and Gladys Jimenez play it more straight and come off the best; they both also have fantastic physiques and the skimpy outfits to show them. In fact, I think that the people who will probably get the most out of this movie are the admirers of athletic female bodies. (**1/2)