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20 years ago Dr Chopper(yes, he is driving a chopper as well as chopping people up) disappeared when the police found dead bodies at his clinic. Since then people have been disappearing around Lake Tanoka(or something) and dead bodies/parts of bodies has been found all over the place. Turns out Dr Chopper needs body parts to stay alive and has been taking them from strangers, like pair of lesbians and 5 sorority girls on their initiation(you get the picture) traveling through Lake Tanoka. When a bunch of teenagers decide to go camping they are bound to clash with the doctor.....

Well, if you wanna waste some time this is the right choice. Acting varies from really bad to mediocre with the girls tripping and falling all the time for no apparent reason. Every chance of showing skin is taken but without actually showing anything at all. The same goes for the special effects who are pretty pathetic with every slash filmed in an angle so you cant see it but there are a lot of body parts in the movie all drenched in blood(probably to cover up how sad they really look ). The plot is pretty faulty and dialog rather sad. Only time I laughed was when Dr Chopper said: "Howdy!" when trying to be scary. Don't watch this one if your not a hack'n'slash freak. Even then I would recommend you to watch something better.

i paid $2.00 for this piece of crap, i want my money back. it is a d grade horror movie that isn't so groovy

There are many MANY floors in this film, including the acting, the lack of actual horror, the lack of nudity (which besides the starting Nurse (porno outfit) and the still breathing nude corpse flash, there is none.

The sound track maybe is the best thing because it has some upbeat sorta guitar riffs/tracks.

There are your usual typical characters, the jock, the jocks woman, the nerdy guy (who looks more like a jock), the rookie cop/ranger (who has the biggest gap in his teeth i wanted to slip a few dollar coins into that gap..or go for a field goal) the mysterious fella and the Pure girl.

The make up was pitiful with side views of dr chopper showing a clear "make up line"and natural skin tones, the cover art to the DVD is clearly photoshop/enhanced to make the cover more enticing as Dr chopper looks like an old "plopper" The scraggy women that hang around Dr chopper are not explained and or look convincing like the rest of this movie.

The plot twist was VERY predictable and the abundance of bad looking FAKE limbs was laughable, what did they think,.... um throw some limbs around and some fake blood and you have a horror film.

Dr chopper himself is the most stupid character created I've seen in a while, though original i believe that the creator of this film was strained for ideas and possibly tried to use the rhyme Doctor and chopper (bike) and thought "bingo" ill make a crappy movie about that.

I've seen worse before..... but this is just plain bad.. everything about it is bad... the lack of suspense...the lack of actual horror or character development... the lack of a decent storyline ...the only thing good about this film was when it finished. This film doesn't fall into the category ïts so bad its good" for me either/

Overall 2/10 the director/writer/editor should know better.

If there was justice in the cinematic universe, director Lewis Schoenbrun would never be allowed to set foot on a movie set again. It would seem inconceivable that anyone who spent two full decades in an editing room, where LS started his movie career, could be so utterly devoid of any sense of pacing or dramatic staging, but this film is damning evidence.

As bad as it is, it is fascinatingly so. From the opening scene, where a nurse is clad in a costume appropriate only for a porno film or a skit on a Mexican variety show, the viewer is compelled to see just how low it can go. The answer isn't far away, as in the next scene we move to a funeral parlor, where the next stunning fashion statement comes in a sexy off-the-shoulders black dress worn by one of the mourners.

Aggressively inappropriate costuming isn't the film's only flaw. The dialog is a treat for connoisseurs of bad writing. "You turn my tears into wine," is a sample gem. The actor deserves an Oscar for delivering that one with a straight face.

The director reinforces every cheeseball scene with what is possibly the schmaltziest soundtrack score ever recorded, which veers from embarrassingly maudlin in the dialog scenes to cheesy groovebox wannabe rocknroll in transitional scenes.

The script introduces characters with no rhyme or reason and story beats are doled out as if with a broken ladle.

Let's not forget this is a "horror" film, though. Our characters find themselves in a forest wherein lurks Dr. Chopper and his two "scary" henchwomen, who are supposed to be some kind of Frankencreatures but look exactly like Valley Girls with fake blood dabbed beneath their Supercut shags. I've honestly seen scarier make-up on eight-year-olds out trick-or-treating on Halloween.

And again we get a whiff of the costume designer's malodorous handiwork, as Valley Ghoul One prances around in a pseudo-Victorian polyblend smock while her buddy wears a nondescript ensemble that might have been almost fashionable in less hip corners of the 1980s.

Dr. Chopper makes the big fashion statement though, looking like a Crisco cowboy who got lost in the woods on his big black Harley, clad from head to toe in zippered black S&M leather.

If this sounds intriguing, by all means check it out. There is plenty of side-splitting and belabored dialog (like the precious "elephant's graveyard" scene or the "intellectual" discourse on Ginsburg).

To be fair, the cinematography is good, considering what was put before the camera, and the actors strive (with wildly extreme results) to make something from a scrap heap of clichés and inanities. You do have to wonder if they were really really stupid or just blindly desperate, not to walk off the set after catching one glimpse of the ridiculous-looking villains with their 99 Cent Store weapons.

The acting was very sub-par, You had Costas Mandalar acting like Triple H's dumber forest ranger brother, a Scott McMahon look-alike as his depute who I guess your supposed to care about but there is no emotional involvement anywhere. You have the Stupid lesbian, Not that I have any thing against lesbians, i don't just stupid ones who keep running around in a punisher like shirt and a grunge like hat who keeps asking if anyone saw her dead lover.

The Villain could be scary and there is a morality tale somewhere about trying to fight age and death but it is lost in this movie. Costas Hurst Helmsley points out to the soon to be victims the way back into town, while obviously there are city lights behind him.

Also A mispronunciation of Ed Gein but pronounced it Gine. As a citizen of Wisconsin. We have had our share of Monsters Gein,Dahmer, and McCarthy, but if your going to use it pronounce it right.

God Why do i watch all these terrible films. Oh yes I am a glutton for punishment and I watch these so you don't have to.

This movie is by far one of the worst B-movies I have ever seen. There are no plot twists at all. Though the acting is decent, the storyline is terrible. There are also many mistakes in the movie, and it was bothersome to watch. For any of you who like horror movies, slasher movies, or even B-movies, I don't recommend this to anyone at all. Most of the movie is focused on pointless killing, in ways that aren't even worth discussing. This movie could very well be compared to a crappy remake of Jeepers Creepers, which, too, wasn't that great of a movie. For anyone who wishes to spend a day at home, watching poorly made movies, this one takes the cake.

Celebrated plastic surgeon Dr. Max Fielding goes on the run after police link him to a series of killings. Twenty years later a group of young friends head to the countryside town of Lake Tatonka in order to unwind. But the town is cursed by the presence of Fielding, now known as "Dr. Chopper" due to his unique method of transportation (a chopper motorcycle) & army of demented nurses. At the same time, the local park ranger, a burnt-out shell of a man named Terrel, must find the inner strength to do his job properly.

Zombie fans will have heard of & curse the name of Lewis Schoenbrun. Schoenbrun was an editor dragged into the quagmire that was called Children of the Living Dead after writer-producer Karen Lee Wolf fired the film's director & crew & enlisted Schoenbrun to re-edit the film. The result was an unholy mess. This should have been enough to have the editor disappear from the genre without trace, but things seldom turn out that way. In 2005, Schoenbrun managed to get the chance to direct his own film. The result was Dr. Chopper.

Dr. Chopper is pretty much a pedestrian slasher flick that has almost nothing to redeem it enough to be watchable. But Schoenbrun surprises by having some skill in editing the film – this one's a lot more coherent than COTLD was. Having said that, the film is nowhere near good enough to warrant a viewing unless you want to see Australian actor & future SAW villain Costas Mandylor do his best glass-munching (the act of doing extreme emotions in an OTT way) & Ed Brigadier walking around in biker garb.

Looks like I'm the first one out to comment upon this excellent and completely talentless tale of cannibalism and plastic surgery gone haywire, and here it goes. Dr. Chopper himself is a lunatic doctor very obsessed with the harvesting of human parts. The good doctor, backed up by some psoriasis-ridden vixens, needs to chop a bit off here, and a bit off there, in order to achieve immortality, so that he can tend to his heavy-metal bike forever and forever. He is apparently able to stir up quite an amount of terror in the hearts of his potential victims, and you really do sympathize with the cabin-youth, you really do feel that there is cause for alarm and a urgent need to flee, when this deadly 80-year old turns up on his bike, sporting a this-is-no-laughing-matter leather suit and WW 2-goggles. On his trail is the tough, not-stereotypical-at-all, small town sheriff, caught up in shouting at people in a very small-town-sheriff way, and of course throwing them around a bit in a very small-town-sheriff way, when he feels the situation calls for it. This is not to lead you to believe that we are here talking about a one-dimensional character at all, because he also is careful to set aside the proper amount of time for grieving. And he shows us clearly, in case we should have any doubts whatsoever, that his heart is not only brimful of the need for fist-use, but also brimful of tears. The way he sits there, in the usual dark office with the usual fireplace, having a really emotional conversation with a picture of his dog-wife Trixie, the tears streaming down his liquor-saturated face....can it really be?! Yes it can, no less than a priceless script, and priceless acting!! There are surprisingly a few decent attempts at creating tense horror, and in these few instances it does not take the old nose dive into the proverbial rock. Not all the way, anyway. But as much as I would have liked to think that I've managed to expose this film as nothing but a horribly failed, but serious attempt at horror, I find myself sitting here, having doubts. Maybe the directors intention was on the contrary, to create a parody? Or a horror-comedy? I really don't know. But you can choose to see it any way you would like, that doesn't change the fact that the film has the words "Half-attempt" written all over its face. Or should that be "Non-attempt"?! Do not be mistaken, when you are going to watch a film of this magnitude, have the old paraphernalia ready at hand; the pipe, the beer, and I guarantee you that the exceptional well written dialogue and acting, will make you end up in Gobbledigob-heaven. All feathery, and jerking it's head. For even better acting and dialogue, I recommend watching each and every Chuck Norris film ever made.

Dr. Chopper (2005)

* (out of 4)

Incredibly stupid, direct to DVD horror film about a group of teenagers who go to a creepy cabin in the woods where various teenagers have been chopped up over the past twenty years. The title character, a psychotic doctor riding a motorcycle, is chopping up teens hoping to find eternal life. After a pretty good opening, which contains some nice gore, this film quickly falls apart due to the horrible acting and a stupid plot twist, which can be spotted within five minutes. After the opening sequence there's very little gore and nudity, which is certainly not a good thing. The performances are so incredibly bad that I often found myself cheering for the bad guy just so I wouldn't have to suffer through any of the acting. Another strange note is that the title killer is somewhat interesting but they end up turning him into a supporting role hiding behind his two female assistants.

Not recommended if you are looking for a horror film to really wrap your head around, or if you are hoping to have the crap scared out of you. But, if you are a fan of the 80's horror / slasher genre and have seen all the original films at least a dozen times, then this is a fun little (no-brainer) for an evening's enjoyment. Director Lewis Schoenbrun brings us a somewhat befuddled story about a plastic surgeon gone mad, while a group of teens spend the 'ol weekend at the creepy cottage. Written by Ian Holt, the story really doesn't seem to have a final destination and most of the characters are unbelievable... But, the acting is not bad at all (for the most part) and the film does have that cheesy 80's kinda feel to it, that we have all come to love. Again, if you are seeking a "Friday The 13TH" remake or a psychological horror thriller... Don't bother, but if you want to crack a beer and watch some blood, guts, boobs and butts... Pop it in.

HAHAHA! This film is actually REALLY funny. REALLY terrible at the same time, but you can't really say it is boring. A friend told me this was the worst film ever, and I needed to see it, so I did and only enough I kind of enjoyed it. It has some okay gore, and some really hot ladies, but the acting is bad, and the "villain," Dr. Chopper has to be the most nonthreatening villain I have ever seen. And I love why they call him Dr. Chopper...dude, he rides a motorcycle! With an obvious ending, but entertaining all throughout, this movie isn't so bad. A scene at the end when the main character frantically throws a garbage pail at the villain is the funniest. Worth a look if you are really bored and need a movie to mock.

There is an expression (I think an Einstein quote) that says, if you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it enough. I understand bad films so i will make it snappy. The acting frankly is not that bad (Even if is based on a horrible script). The "Teens" are obviously actors well into their mid to late twenties, and how 3 well built football players can't hold their own against an old man on a motorcycle and a typically built woman with knife is beyond me. I guess they build them soft in that part of town. Even Costas Mandylor & Miranda Kwok, who are both respected & accomplished actors, cant save this one.

I knew I was in for a treat with this film early on when Dr. Max Fielding (Ed Brigadier) chops off a victim's right hand and the director shows a left hand in a bowl. Ah, so that is why they call him Dr. Chopper. He chops people. Nope! Minutes later the cops raid his empty house, spot a picture of him on a motorcycle and exclaim, "Dr. Chopper!" But our plastic surgeon-turned-madman escapes with his two nurses. On his chopper, we must assume. Cut to 20 years later and sullen Nick (Robert Adamson) is recovering from his mother's death when he finds the deed to a cabin in the woods. His girlfriend Jessica (Chelsey Crisp) suggests they head there with some friends for a weekend ("You turn my tears into wine" Nick realistically says). So with Ginsberg-loving Jimmy (Butch Hansen) plus couple Reese (Chase Hoyt) and Tamara (Ashley McCarthy), the fivesome head up to the cabin to help Nick inspect the place. The bad news is this isolated area is Dr. Chopper's new...uh, chopping grounds. Their only hope is an embittered, alcoholic park ranger (Costa Mandylor).

When recommending this film, my friend mentioned that nearly every line of dialogue is hilarious and he wasn't lying. I laughed harder at this film than any comedy from the last twenty years. It is full of nonsensical stuff. For example, Jimmy from outer appearances is shown as a beer guzzling jock, yet he is annoying people with his neurotic ticks and talks of Allen Ginsberg. The latter leads to a great bit of dialogue where the kids stop at a roadside store and Jimmy immediately shouts this to the older black store owner. This is literally said as their Jeep pulls to a halt in the parking lot.

Jimmy: "You like Ginsberg?"

Store owner: "Ginsberg? Jeez, everything he wrote after 1980 was crap."

Later when the owner sees a earlier Chopper victim pleading for help to the kids to find her girlfriend, he says, "White folks!" I was also legit dying during an emotional exchange between the kids at the cabin (after a cleaning montage, naturally) where Nick guilt trips everyone for not being their when his mom died.

Nick: "I didn't see you at my mom's wake."

Tamara: "Where were you when Reese and I broke up last semester? Friendship is a two-way street, Nick."

Nick: "Where was I? I was with my mother, who was dying. That's where I was."

However, nothing tops the bit where Mandylor is talking to his new trainee about his past. Screenwriter Ian Holt is hoping to go for metaphor here as Mandylor's character starts talking about the elephant graveyard. I get it, dude is burnt out after his wife's death and just looking for that mythical place to go and lay down to die. But if you start your goddang backstory with "Once upon a time I was a chiropractor and holistic healer..." I can't help but burst out laughing. Less than a decade removed from Picket Fences, Mandylor had to be channeling some real life angst and frustration into this role. Luckily for him, the Saw series would pick him up the following year and Dr. Chopper would be a minor speed bump in his long career and I couldn't be happier he hit this slump. Director-editor Lewis Schoenbrun made his feature debut with this film and - wait for it - he was also editor on Children of the Living Dead (2001), which I saw a few months before this and declared one of the most unintentionally funny films I'd seen. It is uncanny how both films have the exact same feel, from the stilted dubbed in lines right down to the neon green DVD cover. Dude has the magic touch. Dr. Chopper might still be looking for its cult, but it is two strong right now.

Sure Dr. Chopper is low budget, but the acting is good and the story has some really tense moments and a few great scares and a wow of a twist and is total fun!

This movie is a throwback to the hey-day of 80's slasher films! And boy, how I did not realize how much I missed them. This movie is every bit as good as any Friday The 13th, Halloween or Nightmare On Elm Street! In fact it's better because it has a plot and the killer is not just a mindless maniac who cannot die! He's a plastic surgeon who has taken his desire to remain young and beautiful too far. The movie is a metaphor for our greedy, celebrity, youth obsessed, plastic surgery mad culture. Dr. Chopper has a point of view and lets the viewer decide which side of the debate he/she falls on. Is the discovery of eternal life and youth worth a few dead sex obsessed teenagers? That's for you to decide, but damn if this movie didn't scare and excite me more than all of this summer's big budget junk! See Dr, Chopper!

I have never been so entertained and laughed so much in my life. The director, writer and actors have created a true comedic masterpiece that will be watched for generations to come. The script was amazing. I mean, who would have thought that a chiropractor "lost his touch" and it caused his wife to die only for him to end up as a park ranger.

Some of the greatest quotes in movie history are in this very film. "Your words turn my tears into wine." "I want you to meet someone, my inner b*h". (Throws bin and fails) "When i was looking into the kids eyes, I thought I was looking at you, and I wanna be looking at you. I wanna be looking at you." (Tries to shoot himself and fails). "I'm the park ranger who's going to f*k you up". "Look its a guy on a motorbike." "Thats not a motorbike, thats a chopper".

Dr Chopper is a scary character indeed. Whenever he magically appeared on that chopper, with his freaky white face paint, something bad was about to happen. Dr Chopper's female nurses would attack the characters with daggers, taking scary air swings.

The script writer really knows how society works as well. One of the girl's boyfriends gets killed by Dr Chopper, but 10 Min's later shes already moved on to the philosophical and great cast character Jimmy. Jimmy will go places in Hollywood. My favorite moment was his interaction with the movie's token black character, arguing who is the best philosopher of all time. Sure, he was a great character, but it was Costas who truly stole the show with his passionate portrayal of a park ranger who's lost his touch in life.

Overall, the best comedy I have seen in a long time. I know it may be considered a horror movie, but surely even the director was taking the p*ss? If not, I'm going to head out tomorrow and make my own horror movie, it would probably be more believable than Dr Chopper. I guarantee enjoyment out of this movie.