Alien Incursion

I am sure this masterpiece had a budget of aboot 500 million Canadian dollars ($63.87 American) eh! Because they spared no expenses in creating the top-of-the-line special effects. Without a doubt the director's 8 year old brother spent hours on his laptop putting them all together!!

The dialog in this classic was stilted in such a way that no one, anywhere speaks like this ever!!! Making matters even worse was the delivery of that dialogue by a completely and utterly talentless cast with the Park Ranger and military commander being the rock bottom of the barrel, true they both had very little to work with, but they managed to descend to the level of the script and make it even worse!

Instead of watching this crap just pop open a Molson's eh and sit back and sing O Canada, it'll be much more fun!

Campers in a forest are attacked by alien creatures who safely arrived with a meteor. Don't ask me how they could survive the crash. A heavily armed rescue team comes to protect the civilians. 10 minutes into this movie, you are probably going to think it's predictable: nasty critters gnawing on entrails are being shot by guys with massive firepower, just like in a cheap video game. But - the movie takes a turn into a different direction for which I was grateful. Stucker (Tom O'Brien), the leader of the "rescue team", has a personal revenge business going on with the hunter Harry (Ken Roberts) and his daughter Kelly (Kiara Hunter) who led the travelers into the forest. Thus, the campers are now being hunted by both aliens and armed men which seems to make survival an almost impossible task... Despite a rather silly script and the poorly animated CGI monsters which don't look real at all, the movie becomes more and more exciting in the second half, so from my point of view, it is OK for a straight to video production. Recommended? Well, I've seen much worse.

I am sure Jack from Minnesota is in the cast somewhere, because no one could ever consider this film as witty or breaking genre rules. The only tensionate moment is when one realizes that there are no black men in this movie and so you don't know who will die first. Everything else is bad CGI, bad acting, bad dialogue, bad sound, bad editing, bad everything. And boring, too.

It's not like I didn't laugh out loud during this movie, but it was only because it stank so much.

And I am not especially picky either. I've seen some of the worst movies ever made in the last few days and I am pretty sure this is not the worst, but it's in the top.

Bottom line: watch it only in a highly intoxicated state, with a bunch of friends with a sense of humour.