I came across "Dark Harvest 3" (a.k.a. "Skarecrow" apparently) in the supermarket bargain bin and got suckered due to the cool DVD cover art and cheap price (thankfully it only cost me $3.99). I hadn't seen the previous 2 "Dark Harvest" movies but I figured, how much back story could there be in a movie series about killer scarecrows anyway? Thankfully (or perhaps not) it turns out that this flick doesn't have any connection to the prior "D.H." films anyway, it was just a quickie, ultra-low-budget indie horror flick that Lions Gate snapped up and attached the "Dark Harvest" name to it. Whether you want to call it "Skarecrow" or "Dark Harvest 3," the fact remains that the "film" is completely, utterly, unwatchable.
The film's opening flashback takes place in "The Tennessee Backwoods" circa 1921, where a gang of moonshiners have just killed an old woman and stolen her land for use in their criminal enterprise. Unfortunately this particular old woman happened to be a witch, and before dying she placed a curse on her property, which causes her scarecrow to come to life and dispatch the sleeping moonshiners with a variety of farming implements. Sounds fine so far, but unfortunately this sequence is so dark and grainy that it's damn near impossible to tell what's going on. If the photography in "Blair Witch Project" gave you a headache, expect this bit to cause an Instant Migraine. As soon as this introduction ended and the opening credits rolled, I knew I was in for a rough ride.
Flash forward to 1981, and a group of annoying twenty somethings (none of whom appear to like each other very much) are headed off to the woods on an annual camping outing. They plan to stay at a remote cabin in the middle of the woods (shades of "Evil Dead," though this film wishes it were one tenth as good as that classic) owned by the family of one of the gang. Upon arrival the group takes part in the usual slasher film activities for a while, i.e. getting drunk, having sex, and getting on each other's nerves, until one of the gals gets her head lopped off in mid-coitus by the evil scarecrow. Turns out the cabin is on the witch's former property and her guardian is still hangin' around protecting the place. Predictable, poorly shot, badly acted mayhem ensues.
Honestly, I wish I had something good to say about "Dark Harvest 3" but there really isn't one redeeming quality about it. The film looks cheap (shot on video perhaps?), the script sucks, and the performances are uniformly awful. Not ONCE will you get the feeling that these "actors" are paying attention to anything other than the cue cards that were doubtlessly being held off camera. (Just listen to the way one guy drones "Oh, baby...that feels so good" during a sex scene. Come on, if you can't even fake THAT convincingly, then there's no hope for you!) The characters spend so much time screaming and yelling at each other that I couldn't wait for the scarecrow to wipe them all out just so they'd shut the hell up. There are one or two decent gore bits but even those weren't enough to save this turkey.
Remember folks, I watch movies like these so YOU don't have to. "Dark Harvest 3"/"Skarecrow" was 90 excruciating minutes of my life that I'll never get back. If you come across this puppy in the bargain bin, treat it as if it's an explosive device and leave it on the shelf. Don't say I didn't warn you!
