50 façons de dire fabuleux

The story of my life as a young overweight gay boy growing up in a small town 35 years ago. What a darling little boy. I also noticed how very true it was that the young man knew what he wanted. His eyes were bleeding to see what he wanted to see! And, yet, his girlfriend, who was not all too happy about being a girl, had no concept of attraction to anyone. She just knew she wanted to play sports and it was her job to take up for the "puffits" of the world. My favorite line was near the end when he said he "belonged here." That sense of belonging is what brings us all together.

Sweet movie. Lynn

On September 8, 2005 at the Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF), I had the chance to see the world premiere of the film "50 Ways of Saying Fabulous." Based on the Novel by Graeme Aitken, 50 Ways of Saying Fabulous is a coming-of-age film set in the '70s in rural Australia.

It stars Andrew Paterson as Billy, a chubby thirteen year-old kid who's interests are different from the regular kids in his school.

While all the other kids are interested becoming rugby stars, Billy dreams of becoming a character in a children's TV show quite similar to Lost in Space. Normally – this would lead to a lot of criticism from his classmates, but Billy's best friend just happens to be Lou (Harriet Beattie) – his cousin, and the best rugby player in the school.

So Billy lives blissfully in his own little world, faux-ponytail and all, until the arrival of puberty. Add to that a few new faces, and a few unexpected twists, and Billy's life will never be the same.

Great effort was made to keep the look of Australia in the mid seventies. Everything from the clothing to the cars – looked authentic. Impressive – considering that this was not a big budget film. The Director Stewart Main has a love for his homeland, and it shows - as Australia is filmed beautifully. In particular – the night scenes are reminiscent of the older days of filming, and not the normal "night = blue lighting" we've become accustomed to seeing.

At the screening, the director said he wanted to make a film that would appeal to all audiences, young and old. That brought about a very quick response from a member of the audience, "Not in America!" This film deals with friendship, homosexuality, love and lust. While it's far from an explicit film, its subject matter will prevent it from showing up any multiplex in America. In Canada on the other hand, the film already has distribution rights. So unlike many TIFF films, this one will be coming soon to a store near you.

The film is not without it's problems. Although it has a healthy mix of imagination, humour, and charm, the end lacks punch. And while it does try to rise above the genre, it has an unattractive "me too" quality. It doesn't offer anything truly unique like the intensity of the movie "Thirteen", or the cattiness of "Mean Girls".

That doesn't mean I didn't like the film. The actors were all wonderful. The cinematography was great.

It's not a film worth going to a theatre to see, but it is a film worth seeing. A nice rental.

Stewart Main's production is a coming-of-age story that bears little resemblance to other typical and predictable movies. 12 year-old Billy idly watches a TV show with his best friend, a rather tomboyish girl who excels at boys sports and acts a bit manly. Inspired by what he sees on TV, Billy wears a fake ponytail and pretends to be Lana, the heroine of the sci-fi series while Lou, the girl, poses as the male hero. They subvert traditional gender affiliated roles as part of a game, but they are also aware of a certain otherness, a certain counterpart that can exist only in private.

The figure of the double, largely described in fantastic literature, is usually developed when the main character fails to recognize his own-self, and starts experiencing a feeling of alienation. The double can adopt several forms, as for instance the form of the exact replica of the character, like in Dostoyevsky's "The double", or on the contrary, it can become the form of an absence of reflection in the mirror image, a horrifying 'presence' as in Maupassant's "Le Horla". Clearly Billy and his friend Lou find an ideal refugee in the form of fictional characters that supply that which they are lacking; Billy is a boy that wishes to be a girl, and Lou is a girl that wishes to be a boy.

In this scenario, two other characters will help develop the dynamic of the double. First of all is Roy, the new kid in the school, who soon becomes attracted to Billy. A most revealing moment takes place when Roy is picked on by kids that held him to the ground, as a consequence of all this roughhousing, the young boy exhibits an erection that soon makes the other lads lose interest in him. This moment is defined by the emergence of sexual excitation in Roy's penis, an irruption of the drive of the real in his body; such pulsations also exist in Billy who stays behind and accepts Roy's invitation to touch his "stiffy".

Do they experiment joy only through phallic exploration? The phallus has no image, the absence of representation in the visual field "signifies that in everything that is imaginary localization, the phallus appears in the form of a lack". As the days go by, Billy is not acquitted of guilt, but nonetheless he decides to join his friend Roy in a shack, wherein they mutually masturbate. But why does Billy seem uncomfortable after these sessions? Perhaps because if the phallus 'is characterized by a lack', then any image would only 'mask' that lack, evoking something which is absent, and in principle one can define that absence as something that pertains to our bodily existence in so far as what is missing in the virtual image is our real existence itself. In the same way Billy can never truly be Lana, from the TV show, he cannot envision his acts with Roy except in the darkness and secrecy of the shack. But what part of our anatomy permits the distinction between oneself and one's own image, including the multitude of others with whom we tend to identify? It is this distinction that seems to get distorted and somewhat effaced in the phenomenon of the double.

The second important character in the story is Jamie, a guy in his twenties. As soon as he enters into the scene, Billy seems to forget all about Roy. He now starts daydreaming about this guy, this strange adult that could eventually pay some attention to him. But before Billy can get closer to Jamie, he must first decide if he should adopt the male or the female position, which is basically the same decision Lou has to make. As the relationship with Roy deteriorates, new problems will arise. The double, again, could signal the coming of ominous events.

The opening night film of the 2006 Melbourne Queer Film Festival, this is an overlong, aimless and rambling piece of fluff.

THANKFULLY the original novel's touchy theme of emerging adolescent sexuality was tastefully handled. Larry Clark, TAKE NOTE.

• If you're a fan of the original novel, don't bother. While the characters and major plot points remain the same, the parts in between these make no sense or have had their context COMPLETELY changed.

• The young lead actors, while charming, seemed confused and crippled by the badly paced and downright bi-polar script.

• If I hear "fubbulous" and that g-damned muzak played again, my head shall explode Cronenberg-style.

CONCLUSION: Love the book, movie BITES ARSE. Two star rating: one for the film getting made, the other for the young actors giving it their best. Expected so much more from the writer/director of the ABSOLUTELY SPANKING (read: fantastic) melodrama "Desperate Remedies" (1995) Sorry Mr. Main.

Before expressing my opinion, I must say that (while I have no personal involvement in the film project) being a school teacher, who's gay, and who grew up and lives in the area in which this film is set - I strongly identify with it.

"50 Ways of Saying Fabulous" has a strong ring of authenticity to it. This may not translate well to the world outside Central Otago, New Zealand - but for a local there's a lot to recognise. A 'coming of age' film it is, but it is also a lot more. It's a brave telling of the true childhood stories that we tend not to allow to see the light of adulthood.

The actors achieve the perfect balance between the paradoxical naivety and knowingness characteristic of the early teenage years. They inspired me with the bravery of their (sometimes misguided) idealism and the story leads them to expose, through their inevitable frustrations, a lot of the senselessness of the restrictions of our narrow society. I loved the relative absence of developed adult roles. The children were not only the main protagonists, but with the unwavering focus on their story: their view became ours - no translation required. Those who would criticise the 'cheesy low budget space-show' scenes woven throughout the film must surely have forgotten the fantasies of their own childhood, or perhaps they never needed to resort to fantasy to escape an all-too-restrictive daily reality. These sequences really were very funny in all of their overt symbolism.

The bravery and incredible sincerity of the outcast character "Roy" (played with unwavering emotional and physical conviction by Jay Collins) struck a chord with me. The tragedy of his determination was almost too much to bear.

I found the shifting of accent for the character "Jamie" (played by Michael Dorman) a little jarring. Somehow "South Auckland Polynesian, circa 2005" segued into "Aussie Battler" a few too many times for me to suspend disbelief.

The filming, in the stunning wilds of Central Otago, captured the vast emptiness of the place beautifully. The characters owned the terrain, there was nothing else there. The intense colour saturation reinforced the historical nature of the film (It was set in the 70's). The drought, and the constant threat of fire, added beautifully to the undertone of tension. Something might go wrong.

Stories like this need to be told over and over in all their variety and colour. I loved sitting in our local cinema surrounded by teenagers from the school at which I teach and seeing them enjoying and responding to the message to "be themselves". New Zealand is perhaps coming of age too, to see a feature film of this nature to fruition.

Anyone with a curiosity for the culture of this isolated southern island would do well to catch this film. It adds a new chapter to the story of where we come from as told in the likes of "The Piano", "Heavenly Creatures" and "Once Were Warriors".

Fabulous.