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Director/lead Larry Bishop tried way, way too hard with Hell Ride. The movie wants to be edgy, witty, provocative, outlandish, biting all of this, seemingly in a Quentin Tarantino/Rob Zombie style. But it's not edgy. The references seem forced. The dialog tries to be clever and fails. The humor is never funny. Nice try setting a gritty tone but we'd have to care about the characters or the story for it to remotely succeed.

What you're left with are cool Harleys and pretty girls surrounding a bunch of tired, old and out of shape "bad boys" in what looks like an attempt to do a modernized Sergio Leone western. If this movie can make newer generations interested in 60s and 70s films, kudos for it. But on its own, it is rather boring and irrelevant. I do believe there is a place for style over substance. But this movie is not it.

If you are easily offended by nudity or swearing, maybe you shouldn't watch this. Actually you shouldn't watch this period! On the other hand it is one of the last (if not the last) movie you can watch the late Hopper and the late Carradine together in one movie. Of course there is one scene with Carradine that might make you cringe, especially if you know the circumstances of his own death.

But there is one other thing that might leave you baffled. It's the story. The fact that you might not be able to follow it through from start to finish. It doesn't even matter that you have a "McGuffin" in there (a very obvious one). What you do get, is a very confident and good Michael Madsen (QT producing might have again brought out the best in him, with a scene on a tree that does look very ad-libbed).

Overall this movie does have a fascination to it (a weird one, that has nothing to do with all the female nudity, though this might make the movie either more or less appealing to you). Not good, but not a bad one either ...

Or that's what the filmmakers would like you to believe, anyway.

This movie tries sooo hard to be cool it's ridiculous. Everything, from the look of the film, the cinematography, the editing, the dialogue and the acting, is geared in super cool mode from the get go. Just to make sure that no one misses how cool this film is, there's a soundtrack of really cool rock n roll tunes and a twangy western-surf-tex mex guitar playing constantly throughout the film. As a final reminder of how frickin cool this movie is, all the actors have been instructed to speak in a hoarse voice, because, as we all know, that's badass.

The plot (if there indeed is one) seems pretty straightforward. But as someone else already pointed out, the director and star of the film, seems fiercely determined not to tell that story, instead focusing on a plethora of naked babes and dialogue that's supposed to be badass, but grows tired surprisingly quick (did they have an contest to see how many times they could cram the words "pussy" and "f*ck" and its derivatives in an 80 minute film?).

This movie was absolutely horrible.

Tarentino should be ashamed to be involved with this awful film. The acting, directing and script are all third-rate - with the entire film playing out like an excuse for writer/director/star Larry Bishop to get laid. The only reason it was made at all is most likely due to his association with QT. The plot of the film is pretty flimsy, and basically tries to survive on not-so-obscure references to older B-movies and some cameos from guys like David Carradine, Dennis Hopper, and Vinnie Jones. Each one is listless in their performance, particularly Hopper who is in full-on paycheck mode at this point in his career. The saving grace, if there is one, is that the script is so laughably bad that it can be entertaining. Bishop tries so hard to get that trademark Tarentino banter and just fails miserably, which can be pretty humorous at times and grating at others. I'd only check this one out if you love bad movies...or if you're really into biker films.

Larry Bishop writes, directs and stars in this soft-core porn; a plot less biker movie about nothing to do with anything. This is one of the worst movies I've ever seen. I actually felt sorry for the girls in this movie (who probably thought they were in the making of a feature film). In all reality they're making a porno. They walk on set, spend three or four days there, say some sexually themed lines to a bunch of old men - thirty years older than them - then they take off their cloths and run around naked. I can only assume this was Larry Bishops only way of getting laid. You see shot after shot directly on girls asses. Shot after shot of Bishop walking up to some random chick and grabbing her by her crotch, as if he were shaking her hand. How this crap was even funded is beyond me.

There isn't one redeeming quality, or one moment in the movie that creates any kind of reaction, or shows any inclination that these people had any idea of what they were doing. If you don't see naked women all that often, then I guess this movie would be for you. If you're eleven-years-old, you might like it. The acting is awful, the writing is awful, the production is awful, and the direction is awful. It's not even worth your time renting it just so you can say you witnessed the car crash. You shouldn't even be reading these reviews. I shouldn't even be writing one.

Well, I found this movie great. Not spectacular, but great.

If you're a fan of the grindhouse, B-movie genre then this is definitely the movie for you. A simple story, with interesting dialogue people penalise this movie for the fact that the dialogue is bland, the acting is amatueristic. However, one thing you have to take into consideration when watching Hell Ride is: it's not meant to be a blockbuster. Nor will it ever be, it's just a fun 84 minute biker flick. Eric Balfour delivered a brilliant performance as Bix/Comanche. Michael Madson, as always, was an amazing choice for his role.

Now, Larry Bishop...

He's not such a brilliant actor. As many people will agree with me, he should spend more time behind the camera rather than playing the lead role.

The setting was great, the cheesy peyote tripping worked well and the cameo performances of Dennis Hopper and David Carradine fitting in nicely.

If you don't like the B-movie genre, explicit dialogue or guns and mud wrestling then this isn't the movie for you.

Otherwise, enjoy :)

I have had more boring stretches of 80 minutes in my life, but none are coming to mind right now. Hell Ride is based on the retro cult 70s theme that Tarantino brought back, and did right, in movies like Pulp Fiction and Reservoir Dogs. The problem with Hell Ride is, unlike PF and RD, the story is garbage and so is character development. How many movies does Bishop think he can blatantly steal from? The brief case in Pulp Fiction, the air gun in No Country, etc. etc. Speaking of Bishop what the hell is he doing acting in this movie? I couldn't help but laugh at those scenes where he's standing with his pelvis trusted out, desperately trying to seem like some hardened biker. Nothing in this movie is believable. And why Dennis Hopper? Did they really need the Easy Rider motif too? I blame Larry Bishop, for his horrible plot and dialogue, not to mention his failed attempt at the leading role. Don't bother watching this movie, it's a waste of time.

To say this movie is bad would be to simplify matters to the extreme and with the exception of Hell Ride's plot, nothing in this life is that simple.

So what's wrong with it exactly... Larry Bishop. The guy must have balls the size of two small dogs to think he could pull this off. Bikes, beer and booty makes for one great cocktail but bikes, beer, booty and bishop... not so good.

The story is interesting, the theme is great, the cast, characters and acting are over the top but welcome, hell, even the directing is good but Larry, why did you have to put yourself in it as the lead? Casting yourself as the lead is a step too far. This isn't going to get you any leading actor roles but will most certainly deem you to a life of character bit parts and walk ons. Larry successfully delivers some of the most ham-fisted dialogue in the most atrocious of displays of acting ever witnessed on celluloid. I can't even bring myself to disgust the batman-esq vocal shenanigans but it's poor.

I am beginning to meander almost as badly as this movie. So in a nutshell: Great cast, great concept, compelling direction, terrible, terrible lead acting.

While most critics were harsh on hell ride,i thought it was a really good biker movie,sort of reminded me of the 1970's biker flicks by American international.a very good cast led by Micheal Madson,and smaller roles by Dennis Hopper and David Carridine.pretty violent and has the Quentin Tarentino trademark.would have been a good drive in flick.features some great music on the soundtrack like cc rider.which was a biker movie from 1971,with Joe Namith,and William Smith,if you like good biker flicks and exploitation,then hell ride is for you.all i can say is i liked it.and i like Tarentino movies.too bad William Smith and Peter Fonda were not in this.but then again it still works.7 out of 10

Everything negative written about this movie is true, but mainly based on high expectations ("Tarantino" in the titles is absolutely misguiding). However if you have some free time, cola or beer and snack, do not expect ANY fresh idea from a movie and just want to relax - you can go and watch it without hesitations. No really, that's the good "upper B-class" with all attributes of biker's movie like dust, guns, leather jackets, shootings in desert and babes. Authors even added another "cool" killing device similar to cattle gun in "No Country for Old Men". Protagonist's ("Pistolero") face is so sour like he has been fed half-a-dozen of lemons through his rectum, but other actors honestly do their job. Just don't expect anything else besides of features described above and you likely to be satisfied.

I honestly do not get why so many people are upset with this film. Its rough, its ridiculous, its over the top, and its a great ride! I admit its not film-making that will change the world- but its a gritty exploitation film, and for anyone who's gotten a kick out of "Devils Rejects," "Kill Bill" or the "Desperado" series this is at least worth taking a peak at.

The cast is all great- Bishop, Balfour and Madsen make a cool trio, each stealing the show at different moments, Dennis Hopper really gives a memorable and entertaining performance, and Carradine shines in a very (darkly) funny cameo. Vinnie Jones is good, he could have been given more to do, but he is entertaining and handles his weapon of choice quite expertly. The story, well- its simple. Its a revenge tale, and an excuse for lots of mayhem and carnage to take place. Again, if you want a gritty, rough around the edges exploitation flick, I do not know what else people are expecting. The story serves its purpose, and keeps the audiences entertained for the hour and a half it plays out. The dialogue does get a bit overly cheesy at points, but that really only adds to the charm of this absurd film- it'll make you laugh, it'll make you puzzle, but I never found any lines to be so distracting that I could not enjoy the film.

So see it if you know what you're getting into! There's a hell of a lot of violence, far far far more nudity, disgusting language and a good amount of despicable anti-heroes. For the type of film that it is, it is very well done and very entertaining! I heartily recommend it for a good, demented time at the movies. I only wish it'd get a wider release, Im lucky I got to see it at all!

Mickey Rourke or Danny Trejo would have been a much better choice. Madsen is really good. The story line is plausible however takes place in a completely ambiguous small town. The story seems to be a compilation of many biker stories and legends brought together. I found it as a biker to be believable, action packed and somewhat accurate. Definitely worth the watch for any enthusiast or action junkie. Again, perhaps because of budget constraints they decide an unknown cast could be carried by Michael Madsen and Dennis Hopper of Easy Rider fame. The bikes and stunt men riding them are great. The costumes are somewhat believable and the story is interesting enough to hold your attention. Lots of flames, explosions and gunshots make this a fairly good action-adventure.

Once, you figure out that the 'alleged' star, writer/director, 'producer' is going to shoot the entire film consisting mostly of himself in scenes in closeups, you've got the idea. I don't mean to suggest that Mr. Bishop doesn't have talent: it takes some kind of nerve to get the financing for what seems, at best, a weak knockoff of a Tarentino film. The film has a slender plot and even that, at best, is hokey. To say that the film objectifies women might just be the understatement of the year. Combine the fake boobs and fake bake that the very young ladies of questionable acting ability have with the very slow moving story, and you have a snooze of a film. There aren't even any good action sequences. The mayhem is very literal and very slow. How fast can Michael Madsen move anyway? (He also has developed a super over tan: did everyone go to Hawaii before shooting?) At the end of the day, you see that the film is barely opening, and to small audiences, and you know that Hell Ride will quickly be forgotten. The rating, as is usual with IMDb, is overly happy. This is a 1 all the way.

You can tell when a movie is trying too hard to be cool and edgy.

Middle aged biker dudes trying to look cool while surrounded by hot girls who are young enough to be their daughters, tons of violence, unnatural amounts of swearing and throw in some nudity while you're at it. It's like watching a bad Rob Zombie movie only way more amateurish and there's less rednecks. It's trying to be a throwback to old school action and grindhouse movies from the 1970's but it's just a snoozefest.

The movie poster says "Quentin Tarantino Presents" in attempt to sucker people in to watching it, he probably owed the director a favor.

Don't bother.

When a movie called Hell Ride comes out you expect a certain amount of biker cliché. With character names like "Pistolero", "Comanche" and "The Gent" I braced myself for the worse and was punch in the face by just that. The dialogue, soundtrack and shooting style are standard for biker movies. Dusty desert blurred from the heat as bikes coming tearing down the road while "CC Rider" plays and they talk about sex and violence. Yawn! The three leads were just ridiculous and unbelievable. Seeing old men like Bishop and Madsen (in a freaking ruffled shirt) riding down a dusty strip of desert highway reminded me of two men trying desperately to relive their youth. Poor Eric Balfour tried his best but with such poor material it got lost. Even an appearance by Dennis Hopper in full Easy Rider swing, couldn't save it. And let's talk about the store bought tans shall we? Many have compared this to Tarantino's work. It is not even close. What makes Tarantino's work so brilliant is he knows it's over the top so he just goes balls out and takes it as far over the top as possible. Bishop took this film so seriously that it became nothing more than a poor copy of the exploitation genre.

This is a biker flick. There are a few known actors among them. There's something about money, and something about the past. The gang is concerned about a rival gang. The story is a mess of boredom and confusion. Larry Bishop seems to have done a bunch of biker films back in the day and worked a bit with Tarantino. The man only has a few writing credits and it shows. It's not cohesive writing. It's mostly posing. The most memorable scene is pissing on Dennis Hopper's boots. The best thing he does is to cast a whole lot of beautiful babes. The snarky comment would be calling them a bunch of strippers. Hollywood has plenty of beauties willing to take it off for the camera but they aren't always strippers. All I can say is that they are probably the highlight of the film.

The first time I watched this movie I wasn't sure I liked it.

It seemed very cheesy and over the top. I didn't like the way they seemed to be trying to be like the 60's and 70's biker movies.

I missed the point the first time I saw it.

But there were some scenes I wanted to see again, because I had watched it late one night and didn't finish it, so I watched it a second time and I must say I liked it a little more. The next day I found myself thinking about it and wanting to watch it again to see some of the sections over again.

So I watched it a third time, and not on my veranda as I had the night before, but in my private office/study and paid attention to every scene. I must say it really grew on me.

It reminded me of the movie Natural Born Killers. You either 'got it' or you didn't. You either loved it or hated it.

Now I read all 11 pages of reviews and I can see the film students are out in force, but this was not a film that was going to follow what your professors told you about plot and plot development. Or script writing and some other things that people seem to want to 'act' like are part of making art films.

I digress.

However, having made a few micro and low budget films, and being in many small budget ones as an actor, I can tell you that this movie had flavor. It was, as someone else said on another review, a movie about biker movies.

It had sex, but never showed anyone HAVING sex. It showed a lots of T & A, but nothing so bad I would compare it to porn, and those that do are just not living in reality.

Now, was it weird? Yes. Was it Oscar winning? No. Was is good entertainment? YES! I judge a movie by a few simple things. Was it entertaining is the primary goal I seek in a movie. This one passed with flying colors.

The acting was NOT that bad. The chatter between the folks was right out of those macho, campy, films this one was inspired by. Anyone who doesn't see that doesn't understand the true 'B' movie and REALLY doesn't get Bishop's idea here.

Not surprising in today's film world of computer generated images and gazillion dollar blockbusters but this is different.

I will again state, if you see this movie at least three times, keep an open mind, leaving all your QT wannit-to-be at home, let yourself forget all the stupid (and usually wrong) stuff your film professor told you, and allow yourself to see a movie that was meant to be a 'B' movie about 'B' movies, in other words, fun and nothing else, you just might 'get it.' And for all the folks on here talking about all the stuff that was 'stolen' from other movies, I say, show me the super duper ultra original piece you flaunt as your ideal movie and I will find the movies they stole stuff from.

It is a stupid argument and ignorant at the same time. Anyone who has ever made a REAL movie will tell you that everyone 'steals' from other movies, it's called inspiration.

And for the folks calling the bikers 'un real' I can tell you that you have never been around true outlaw bikers before. And you have never been to a real outlaw biker party. They are hard drinking, hard screwing, hard riding, dudes you don't mess with. You would be very surprised at all the 'old dudes' getting laid by hot younger ladies too. I would love to see the yuppie Harley types show up at a real biker rally. Oh boy.

I digress again.

To those who haven't seen this, don't listen to the nay sayers, see for yourself. You just might be one of the folks that 'gets it.'

B-Rad-O

From executive producer Quentin Tarantino comes "Hell Ride," a throw-back biker flick/vehicle for Larry Bishop, who not only serves as the lead in the film, but also steps up to the plate as writer/director. The film follows the exploits of a hardened clan of bikers known as The Victors whose penchant for booze, women and good old fashioned revenge seems to have bonded them for life.

Bishop, along with his co-stars Michael Madsen and Eric Balfour, manages to conjure up enough charisma in spite of poorly written characters and the cringe-worthy dialog they are forced to spew. Here is where the Tarantino touch would have saved the film, but alas, the famed director's involvement appears to be limited to providing funding and promotion for the film, rather than actually helping to nurse it along. Bishop does the whole Grindhouse/Tarantino/Rodriguez schtick well enough on the surface; the film looks good and has a vibrant soundtrack, but not much else. What the film lacks is true charm and appeal, not to mention, a cohesive or even mildly interesting plot.

Bit parts from the likes of David Carradine and Dennis Hopper may serve to shake you out of the semi-comatose state the film lulls you into, but neither character do much to improve or advance the story. It's almost as if they are there for us to say "Hey, look! Dennis Hopper! Neat!" rather than having the actors put to good use. In the end, "Hell Ride" is all style and no substance. There's lots of eye-candy -- from the babes to the bikes -- but not enough plot to go around, even for it's miniscule 80 minute running time, which still makes for a ride that goes on way too long.

That's what I kept asking myself while watching this film. I mean the amount of nudity and sex was one thing but another part of the movie which gave its genre to the adult industry was its lack of storyline. Really I just wanted to get up and leave during the whole movie, but I persisted. I persisted in the hope that maybe the storyline would get better, that there might be a good twist at the end. However I couldn't have been more wrong. In the end I persisted because I figured I could write a bad review for it if anything after watching it.

I mean don't get me wrong there is nothing wrong with beautiful, sexy and vibrant women, but when the director only shows that along with a shitty story thinking it's what the viewer wants to see, it insults us all. To think we are all so shallow to only want to see burlesque from rep ratable, big movie industry players is preposterous. My advice: hire a different movie.