Souviens-toi de moi

Soap opera enthusiasts will love this film. Each scene telegraphs what predictable nonsense will follow. The only element rising above such overwrought displays is generally apt use of camera and sound to capture an authentic flavor of life in a neurotic sort of middle-class Italian household, circa early twenty-first century.

The plot is too obvious even to discuss in this forum. Others may do so, but I consider it an exercise analogous to a dog chasing its tail. Each main character is moreover annoying to the point of inviting frenzy as the only resolution to trying to understand what, exactly, each one is about. There is as well much shouting and physically running around, cell phones in hand.

Watch it for its sets, its scenery, its depiction of contemporary Italy -- a cosmopolitan milieu eschewing travelogue vistas in favor of modern kitchens, television studios, and panoramic street scenes in residential neighborhoods.

Providing, of course, that there is nothing better on the adjacent channel.

The only way this soap opera turned into a feature film could have redeemed itself would have been with a "Godfather"-like ending: all of the offending parties (and God knows this family was filled with nothing but 'tipi antipatici') would be liquidated at the very end, as just retribution for their total 'antipatia'. This movie has not a single character in it who is likable, which, I suppose, makes for an interesting cinematographic exercise: you'd like to get up and leave these horrible people to themselves and the screen, but you can't bring yourself to do it because you're hoping that the director will obliterate them for you at some point in the film.

Yesterday I saw this excellent movie, and it is still lingering in my brain and my soul.

I merely liked, not loved, Gabriele Muccino's smash Italian hit L'Ultimo Bacio when I saw it, since its depiction of thirtysomething doubts and fears left a sort of slightly fake aftertaste in my mouth. Plus, it waned out of my mind in a couple of hours, even though I had enjoyed while I was in the theatre.

Ricordati Di Me is a very, very different deal. It's a delicate, multi-faceted, true and touching punch in your stomach.

Well written and well played - especially by the extremely skillful and absolutely charming Fabrizio Bentivoglio, who's one of Italy's most gifted thesps as well as the longtime boyfriend of Rain Man's Valeria Golino (here you see him pouring his heart out onscreen with painful, searing directness) - the movie brings you into the home of a dysfunctional Italian family not dissimilar from so many dysfunctional Italian families.

Meet them: there is the melancholic, romantic, slightly frustrated husband Carlo (played by Bentivoglio), who's an obscure white-collar worker who once wanted to be a writer and keeps a sensitivity that leaves him totally exposed to raw emotions and to the eventual unfair blow of fate, all of this while keeping as well a still-unfinished novel in one of his drawers; then there is his VERY frustrated teacher wife (played by the ever-classy Laura Morante), who once wanted to be a stage actress. They've got two teenage kids, one of them a vain and egotistical 18-year-old daughter, keen on only one thing, i.e. becoming a TV starlet (played by stunning newcomer Nicoletta Romanoff), and the other one a vaguely leftish, pot-smoking daydreamer senior high schooler son (played by the director's brother).

Nothing new or revolutionary here, be sure of that, but the whole tale elaborated by Gabriele Muccino about the emotional disintegration of this apparently average family is narrated with passion and participation, both by its writer-director and by the actors.

The foursome meet enormous difficulties in communicating with each other - not only the parents with their children do, but also each of them with any other one, and egotism and indifference run rampant, especially in the veins of Valentina, the young daughter, who's a truly upsetting spectacle to watch, what with her relentless pursuing of a tinsel world, a world made of garish make-up, TV studios and squalid sex relationships with one or the other TV beefcake idol, since this girl, while still looking very innocent on the outside, would do anything to be cast in some cheesy TV show as one of the decorative babes who strut and grind in the background.

So, when you see Carlo, the husband, falling again - after many years - for married and unsatisfied mother of two Alessia (the ever-stunning Monica Bellucci, here way more expressive and intense than usual), an old flame of his youth, you just cannot think, not even for a second, of him as a middle-aged philanderer, or of Alessia as your typical homewrecker. The rekindling of their love is something so pure, so tender, so NEEDED by both these characters, that you can't help rooting for them - and be heartbroken when things just become spinning in a totally unpredicted direction, which I don't want to spoil for you.

I also truly appreciated the open ending, which leaves the audience enough room to imagine whatever they like for the future life of these characters, who've just been, anyway, through a journey able to break - once and for all - the walls of hypochrisy that previously surrounded them.

Go and see this movie, you won't regret it.

This movie is hard to absorb, partly because the dialogue is difficult in translation and partly because of the fading and mixing of scenes that introduce the 4 character stories within. Four people in a family so plausibly like middle class families everywhere, except here in Italy the members are more likely to be beautiful, handsome, suave, and worth staring at for some feature or another. Muccino shows us that the happiness we work for within a family is easily thrown away (no wonder there is so much divorce), but that the common need to have one place where we think we can be recognized and loved for who we are can bind even the most dysfunctional family unit. Each character here is struggling with ego. Carlo (the handsome Fabrizio Bentivoglio whose hair belongs on marble statues) wants romantic love and an escape from boredom of his job and family -- he ought to have had something different, but he doesn't, and honestly he is the middle of middle class personified -- a salesman working on number 8 sale. Guilia (Larua Morante -- among the most beautiful of Italian actresses currently) is hopelessly insecure but pictures herself as a great stage actress, which is might possibly be -- if it really was her obsession -- the real obsession being to retain the normality of her marriage facade. Valentina (Nicoletta Romanoff) is the a self absorbed teen age bod beautiful with the hips and hair of her generation -- so anxious for a bit role in a dreadful television programme to recognize her beauty. And finally Paolo (A Muccino relative surely) desperate for recognition of his specialness. All want recognition for the specialness and at the same time the security of the familiar. Every moment of this movie shows the tension between the desire for a self-perceived "fame" or "happiness" based on selfishness and the pull that conventional family love provides. These characters recognize true happiness when the routine is threatened and Fabrizio faces possible paraplegia. The other three cannot (although they do) contemplate anything but return to the beginning. Scene after scene develops the characters -- and portrays their dilemma of self versus family -- something many of us continually face when lucky enough to have a unit that is at the same time crushing of self and supportive of "love". The ending is perfect -- smile, Fabrizio-- One was left knowing that nothing had really changed for this family or the individuals involved although 3 of them appeared to get what they wanted -- and even Fabrizio got his "break" from routine. Maybe he was the unluckiest and had to smile the hardest as he built his selfish love on a dream that had no apparent fulfillment (NO BRIEF ENCOUNTER THIS -- just a desire for a Brief Encounter). I imagine this movie was very disappointing to many -- it was a treat to one who scoured the video store for something different and found a depiction of every day life that was hopeful and helpless and maybe the description of a happiness that is never fully satisfactory but we are required in the end to accept -- and to live without ever being fully aware.

There's a strange sort of paradox at work in "Remember Me, My Love," an Italian film that seems to be operating under some bizarre inverse law of quantum physics. For while the movie itself moves at a breakneck pace, hurtling from one scene to another with near-reckless abandon, we can't help noticing that the faster it goes, the slower it seems. Perhaps, we simply wear ourselves out trying to keep up with it and it is this exhaustion factor that ultimately accounts for our restlessness and ennui.

"Remember Me, My Love" focuses on a family of four, whose members haven't been getting along too well of late. The parents, Carlo and Giulia, are both trying to find ways to cope with a bad case of middle aged crisis: he, by rekindling a romance with a beautiful former flame, and she, by pursuing the career in acting she abandoned when she became a wife and mother. Their children, Valentina and Paolo, are typical adolescents, all caught up in rebellion, identity crises and complicated affairs of the heart.

Although the film attempts to provide some insight into the complexities of modern family life, the characters come across as so whiny and self-indulgent that any sympathy they might have engendered on the part of the audience quickly turns to indifference and even irritation. The actors do their best (particularly Laura Morante as Giulia), but the characters they are called on to play never engage us much beyond the surface level. This lack of depth is further compounded by the whirlwind nature of the storytelling, which rarely allows the actors the time they need to settle down and work out the subtle nuances of their roles.

In all fairness, I must admit that, in the second hour, the film improves considerably, trafficking in some genuinely raw emotions that exemplify the devastating effects that a disintegrating marriage can have on all members of a family. Moreover, the film ends on a courageously inconclusive note, which goes a long way towards mitigating some of the theatricality and artificiality that permeate the rest of the movie.

Taken as a whole, "Remember Me, My Love" turns out to be much less than the sum of its parts, but the performances and a few good scenes do make it palatable.