Les disciples

I watched this on cable the other day waiting for it to improve. The dialogue was unbelievably bad, the humour so missed its mark it reminded me of Batman & Robin on TV or The Cisco Kid old series. I normally like this genre of film but this one is just BAD. (I'm not sure I've ever seen Ice-T in a movie and been able to believe his character.)

It's hard not to remark on the amazing costumes of the leading ladies, who look like they're ready for a Saturday night out at a swanky nightclub, even in the most intense action scenes. Besides that, everything is dreadful in this bogus martial arts action film, which is shot like a pop video, and makes almost as much sense.

Made-for-TV fare in league with hyper-stylised new wave Hollywood action, yet this is quite obviously the cheaper end of the market. The story is instantly forgettable – stereotype trash about Castro's violent cronies sent on a mission to remove the arm of Cuba's top baseball star, destined to live the millionaire lifestyle for a US team. The ‘disciples' seem to be the last line in justice, then, a young group of Miami-based law enforcers who's Sensai sends them on a protection exercise to guard the baseball star. But the main focus here is on style – our heroes may act like Van Damme on a bad day but they don't half look good, sporting the latest bland trenchcoats and attractive leathers. The busy soundtrack and editing is certainly a headache, reducing any excitement in the tame fight sequences, and gangster rapper Ice-T's presence as a martial arts supremo, who used to play monopoly with none other than Bruce Lee? Hmm, I think not.

I don't know what worries me more, the fact that this film is truly AWFUL or that I couldn't stop watching it ?!?

If you are going to watch this, be sure that ...

a) You REALLY have nothing else to do.

b) You don't expect a story line, acting or originality.

Other than than it's actually quite good for a giggle ;-)

what a bad movie, from the cheesy lines to the ludicrous action sequences with blurred shots to make it seem real to the unbearably bad actors, this movie gets right down to being almost too bad to watch, not even the attractive men and women make it worth watching, and how does ice T make a movie THIS bad?

not worth watching even if you like laughing at bad B movies, there are better ways to waste your time.

in one word... UGH