Payne

John Larroquette is delightfully rude and self-serving as hotel owner Royal Payne in this Yank version of "Fawlty Towers"! Certainly, his version of crass attitude is different from John Cleese's, as it should be. Some viewers might say that the relationship between Payne and his wife Constance (JoBeth Williams) seems too flexibly forgiving, but there IS a definite viper-like chemistry between the two, like a more sarcastic Nick & Nora Charles. I also like (even though it is a comic-relief ethnic stereotype) Rick Batalla's portrayal of Mohammad, the bumbling bellhop. Just like Manuel in "F.T.", he is cringingly subservient to his boorish boss ... I'm waiting for a dressing-down scene of "This Royal's wife. This Royal. This smack on head." And Larroquette will give Batalla a smack on the head ... let's wait and see!

This really ought to qualify as one of the worst television shows of all-time, no kidding. Right up there with Supertrain, The New Odd Couple and all the others in that elite category, that rarefied air. And the fact that it's a cheap knockoff of John Cleese's masterpiece Fawlty Towers isn't even the issue. The jokes and situations are hardly original and the characterizations are downright awful. I actually felt embarrassed for Larroquette, who I think is one of the most underrated comic actors in the world. Granted, he's no Cleese, but he's not that far below him, either. JoBeth Williams was just terrible, as are the Polly and Manuel ripoff characters. It's just plain tasteless, lame and stupid. That Larroquette's character on the show is actually named "Royal Payne" should give you an idea of the intelligence level involved in the humor. "Night Court" and the fabulous "John Larroquette Show" have this turkey beat eight ways to Sunday. An absolute piece of garbage. 0 * out of 4

Suppose you`re an executive of a TV company and a producer runs in saying " Hey let`s rework FAWLTY TOWERS and set it in America " What would you do ? I think the more humane amongst us would sack the producer on the spot , while the less humane would decapitate him for having an idea so bad it borders on the psycotic . I doubt if anyone would say " Hey what a great idea , lets do it "

PAYNE isn`t as bad as it could have been , the worst thing they could have done is copy the scripts word for word and hope for the best, but it`s still a bad sitcom. Royal and Connie Payne love each other and it`s revealed Royal is a great lover not something that can be said about Basil Fawlty who we can believe hasn`t had sex for many years. So you see the character interaction of Sybil and Basil is missing as is the class obsession and sarcasm of Mr Fawlty which made him one of the most memorable people in television history . There`s a bellhop who `s Mexican which means he can speak Spanish and is a Manual to Royal Payne`s Basil Fawlty and that`s about the only half decent crossover from the Cleese/Booth masterwork . PAYNE is only worth watching for the novelty value

Really. None. A poor rip-off of Fawlty Towers but without the charm (or the Cleese) of the original. It's a testament to bad taste that more than one episode was made. If you see this in the listings, do yourself a favour and avoid it like the (bubonic) plague - you can use the time to pull your fingernails out instead (it'll be more enjoyable).

The opening credits mention that it is based on Fawlty Towers. Apart from being based in a hotel run by husband and wife, I think that that is about it. You might as well say that "Four Weddings and a Funeral" is based on "Get Carter", as they are both set in England.

Where is the animosity between the hoteliers? Where is the violence against Manuel? Why is nothing funny? How come everyone is nice to the customers and the odds aren't stacked against them?