- Johnny Storm: Wake up, Ben. Hey, rise and shine, big boy. How you feeling?
- Ben Grimm: Where am I?
- Johnny Storm: Back on Earth. We're in quarantine. Victor's medical facility.
- Ben Grimm: Reed? Sue?
- Johnny Storm: Oh, they're fine. Everybody else is fine.
- Ben Grimm: What's wrong with me?
- Johnny Storm: I swear to you, Ben, they've done everything humanly possible. The best plastic surgeons in the world are here, Ben. You had the best.
- [Johnny picks up a hand mirror on the bed table before Ben can reach it, reluctant to give it to him]
- Ben Grimm: Give me that mirror.
- Johnny Storm: I don't think if that's a good idea. They said the shock alone...
- Ben Grimm: I said, give me that goddamn mirror!
- Johnny Storm: Okay, Ben. Just be strong.
- [Ben grabs it from him. Then slowly raises it to look and see that he's totally normal]
- Johnny Storm: Unfortunately, the doctors just couldn't do anything to fix your face.
- Reed Richards: I'm trying to figure out why we each ended up with different symptoms.
- Johnny Storm: Oh, well that's easy: I'm hot. You're... well, you're a little limp. Sue's easy to see through. And Ben's always been a hardass.
- Susan Storm: It's got to be the cloud! It's fundamentally altered our DNA!
- Reed Richards: Now, let's not jump to conclusions. We need a massive amount of evidence before making that leap.
- Johnny Storm: Hey, guys!
- [his thumb is on fire. He snaps his fingers, and it goes out. He snaps it on again, then off again]
- Johnny Storm: Now picture that... But everywhere! I mean... Everywhere! *What*?
- Reed Richards: The cloud has fundamentally altered our DNA.
- Johnny Storm: [smiles, laughs hysterically] Cool!
- Victor Von Doom: [proposing to Sue Storm] Four words, Sue. Four words that will change our lives forever...
- Reed Richards: [interrupting] The cloud is accelerating!
- X Games Reporter: [referring to Ben] What is that? What do you call that thing?
- Johnny Storm: That's it - the Thing. Yeah, you think this is bad, you should have seen him before!
- Ben Grimm: Okay. Now I'm gonna go kill him!
- Ben Grimm: You know, living through something like this you really appreciate having the right woman in your life.
- Reed Richards: Yeah, you and Debbie are perfect.
- Ben Grimm: I'm not talking about Debbie.
- [indicates to Sue]
- Reed Richards: What? Come on! She's got a good thing with Victor. He's smart, he's powerful, he's successful...
- Ben Grimm: [coy] Well, maybe *you* should date him, then!
- Reed Richards: [smiles] Ben, she ended up with the right guy. Everything's worked out for the best.
- [Reed walks away]
- Ben Grimm: [shakes his head] Do I have to do everything myself?
- Ben Grimm: [Sitting on the Brooklyn Bridge] Oh yeah Ben, few days in space, it'll be great, what's the worst that could happen?
- Ben Grimm: Hey, no more wise cracks about the way I look.
- Johnny Storm: Hey, call me Mr. Sensitivity.
- Johnny Storm: [walking through the crowd] Okay, wide load coming through! Everybody move! He's huge!
- Ben Grimm: Hey! Come here, Mr. Sensitive.
- Johnny Storm: Flame on!
- Ben Grimm: Show-off!
- [Johnny flies into the sky to make a fiery 4]
- Reed Richards: How many times have I ever asked you to do something that you said you absolutely could not do?
- Ben Grimm: Five times.
- [walks off]
- Reed Richards: I had it at four.
- Ben Grimm: [from offscreen] Well, this makes five!
- Ben Grimm: Ladies, I'm gonna need to borrow your car.
- Old Lady with Car #2: The transmission sticks.
- Ben Grimm: Not gonna be a problem!
- [hurls the car in the direction of Doom]
- Victor Von Doom: Do you really think fate turned us into gods so we could refuse these gifts?
- Susan Storm: Victor, you *always* thought you were a god. Now back off.
- Victor Von Doom: Susan, let's not fight.
- Susan Storm: No, let's!
- Johnny Storm: All right, I'm here, let's make this quick, I've got a lot of places to go today. Oh wait - I don't go anywhere!
- Reed Richards: Johnny, it's imperative that we stay inside for the foreseeable future.
- Johnny Storm: I know, I know, but when you said that last time my brain hurt a week.
- Susan Storm: Johnny, it's too dangerous for you to be in public.
- Johnny Storm: You've been saying that for years.
- [after he falls off his snowboard and lights on fire, melting the snow around him into water, talking to nurse]
- Johnny Storm: Care to join me?
- Johnny Storm: [Ben enters the lobby] Hey! Look what the marketing guys did! Look, check it out, listen, listen, you'll love this...
- [holds up a little Thing doll that says, "It's clobberin' time!" in a squeaky voice]
- Johnny Storm: It's catchy, right?
- [giggles]
- Johnny Storm: Isn't that great?
- [Ben takes the figure from Johnny, smashes it into the wall and stomps away]
- Johnny Storm: Aww, that was the prototype!
- Susan Storm: Johnny, you were at 4,000 Kelvin! Any hotter, and you're approaching supernova!
- Johnny Storm: Sweet!
- Susan Storm: No, not sweet! That's the temperature of the sun!
- Reed Richards: And not only could you kill yourself, but you could set fire to Earth's atmosphere and destroy all human life as we know it.
- Johnny Storm: Got it. Supernova, bad.
- [gives two thumbs up]
- Reed Richards: [Talking about his home] So what do you think?
- Johnny Storm: I don't know Reed, I think you might be taking you work home with you.
- Reed Richards: [extends his arm, stretching it under a metal door, and bringing his hand up to the window on the other side]
- Johnny Storm: That's gross!
- Susan Storm: You don't want to walk around on fire for the rest of your life, do you?
- Johnny Storm: Is that a trick question?
- Reed Richards: Exposure to a high energy cosmic storm could advance our knowledge of planetary life.
- Victor Von Doom: Same old Reed, always stretching, reaching for the stars.
- Reed Richards: [while fighting Victor Von Doom] Johnny! Supernova!
- Johnny Storm: I thought we agreed that was bad!
- Reed Richards: Now!
- Victor Von Doom: I've always wanted power. Now I have an unlimited supply.
- Ben Grimm: And no Thing to stand in your way.
- [Susan's invisibility has worn off and she's now standing in front of a crowd in her underwear]
- Reed Richards: I see you've been working out.
- Susan Storm: Shut up!
- Ben Grimm: [complaining about Johnny] No! I cannot take orders from the underwear model.
- Reed Richards: Come on now, Ben.
- Ben Grimm: That wingnut washed out of NASA for sneaking two Victoria's Secret wannabes into a flight simulator.
- Reed Richards: Youthful high spirits.
- Ben Grimm: They crashed it into a wall. A flight simulator.
- [as the four enter the elevator, it creaks and from Ben's massive body weight]
- Johnny Storm: Either we're moving really fast or not at all.
- [the elevator's "exceed maximum weight" sign lights up]
- Ben Grimm: I'll take the stairs.
- [Johnny hurls a fireball that smacks Ben in the back of his head]
- Ben Grimm: Did you just...?
- [gets another fireball in the face]
- Susan Storm: Johnny, stop it!
- Ben Grimm: That's it, Tinker Bell! You wanna fly? Then fly!
- [Johnny has engulfed Dr. Doom in a huge fire cone that has just burned away Doom's clothes and outer skin]
- Victor Von Doom: Is that the best you can do? A little heat?
- Reed Richards: Time for your lesson - Chem 101. What happens when you rapidly cool hot metal?
- [the Thing smashes a water hydrant and soaks Dr. Doom, solidifying his metal form and immbolizing him]
- Johnny Storm: Digital camera - $250. Memory stick - $59. The look on your hard-ass former C.O.'s face when he finds out he's your junior pilot - priceless.
- Ben Grimm: [shaking head sadly, trying to make Alicia understand] You don't know what it's like out there. Walking around like some kind of circus freak. People staring, whispering...
- Alicia Masters: [sarcastically] I wouldn't know anything about that.
- Ben Grimm: [instantly contrite] I mean...
- Johnny Storm: [to Reed, after the fight with Ben] What?
- Reed Richards: You need to control yourself, and think before you act.
- Johnny Storm: Yeah, but you see, that's your problem; you always think, you never act! What if we got these powers for a reason? What if it's like some higher calling?
- Reed Richards: A higher calling? Like getting girls and making money?
- Johnny Storm: Is there any higher? You know what Reed - this is who we are. Accept it. Or better yet, enjoy it.
- [first lines]
- Ben Grimm: Typical of Victor Von Doom to build a thirty-foot statue of himself.
- Reed Richards: Well, it's obviously aimed at first-time visitors to create feelings of smallness, inadequacy.
- Ben Grimm: Good thing it ain't working. Reed, what are we doing here? This guy's fast-food, strip-mall science.
- Reed Richards: This wasn't our first stop, in case you forgot. Besides, Victor's not that bad. He's just a little - larger than life.
- Ben Grimm: [after finding out that he's working for Johnny] I cannot take orders from the underwear model.
- Ben Grimm: [referring to Reed, Susan and Johnny in their new outfits] You guys look like an '80s rock band!
- Susan Storm: [to Johnny as a heat-seeker rocket is heading towards them] Don't even think about it!
- Johnny Storm: Never do.
- [he jumps off the Baxter Building]
- Victor Von Doom: It's time to end this.
- Ben Grimm: No, Vic. It's clobbering time!
- [he sends Dr. Doom flying. A metal painting falls on the latter]
- Ben Grimm: Damn, I've been waiting to do that!
- Johnny Storm: Come on, Ben. Smile. They wanna like you, bud. Say hi.
- [to a group of little kids]
- Ben Grimm: Uh, don't do drugs!
- Victor Von Doom: [after he turns Ben to normal] Take a good look Ben. This is what a man looks like who embraces his destiny.
- [punches Ben and sends him crashing]
- Victor Von Doom: One down - three to go.
- Reed Richards: [appearing on the landing] Vic?
- Victor Von Doom: Right on cue!
- Reed Richards: Ben, I've been crunching the numbers on the machine. I think if we can rework the power settings...
- Ben Grimm: [casually] Forget it, egghead. I'm good as is.
- Alicia Masters: [approaches and hands Ben a large metal mug of beer] Better than good, baby.
- [they clink glasses causing hers to shatter]
- Alicia Masters: You just... need to work on your touch.
- Ben Grimm: [hugging her and smiling widely] I like the sound of that.
- Reed Richards: Think about all the people we can help if this works. Look, we got what we wanted. That's enough. A few days in space, it'll be great. What's the worst that can happen?
- Von Doom's Doctor: Your entire biophysical structure is changing.
- Victor Von Doom: That's terrible news.
- [he kills the Doctor]
- Victor Von Doom: I think I'll get a second opinion.
- Ben Grimm: [referencing Reed] He does the talking. I do the walking.
- Victor Von Doom: So take a walk, Ben.
- Susan Storm: [about the machine that could change them back to normal] What are the risks?
- Reed Richards: Even a small miscalculation could increase our symptoms exponentially - or perhaps even kill us.
- Johnny Storm: Now, dying - that's bad, right? I say we just let sleeping dogs lie, guys.
- [to Johnny as they wait for the traffic light to turn green]
- Goth Guy: Where's your hot sister and the monster?