Many people from The Netherlands, where this movie originates from, refer to it as the worst movie ever made in their country. And you know what? Those many people are right, "De Zeemeerman" is a hopeless dud.
And yet, the project once started out as one of the more ambitious Dutch film-ideas in history. Director/Co-writer Frank Herrebout got inspired by the massive international success of "Jurassic Park" and wanted to make The Netherlands' very own Sci-Fi/adventure about megalomaniacal scientists, genetic experiments gone wrong, and freaky creatures on the loose. It was going to be spectacular, with never-before-seen hi-tech special effects and lots of international appeal, but alas...
"De Zeemeerman" became a big flop. The plot is far too preposterous, ridiculous, implausible, infantile, and imbecilic for a Sci-Fi/fantasy. It feels more like a light-hearted sex-comedy, and that's eventually also what the film poster wanted you to believe, but it isn't nearly funny or sexy enough. In the end, it's absolutely nothing at all. Or, like the famous local expression says, it's neither fish nor meat.
Deranged scientist Swezick inserts a fertilized female egg into the uterus of a sea lion and flushes the animal down the toilet. Nine months later, there's a baby floating in the sea who can breathe underwater. He's rescued by two fishermen that raise him, and he grows up to be a handsome young man with sadly one insurmountable problem: he smells incredibly fishy! Better said, he stinks of fish! When the two fishermen die in a silly way, Tony is on his own. He is excluded, cheated, and bullied, but through a friendly neighbor he comes into possession of a potion that makes him invisible. In fact, why am I even bothering to summarize? Nobody should read a synopsis for "De Zeemeerman", let alone consider watching it.
Several famous and successful Dutch actors got tricked into starring in this film, like Huub Stapel, Peter Faber, and Serge-Henri Valcke. I bet none of them like to be reminded about this low point in their careers. For about half an hour, or so, the silliness is still funny and charming to behold, but then the whole thing becomes simply unwatchable. Awful acting by the lead performers, lame jokes, pathetic plot twists, annoying music, and a running time that outstays its welcome; - that's "De Zeemeerman". Special thanks (or not) to the horror & cult film-magazine "Schokkend Nieuws" for bringing this turkey to my attention again. I hadn't thought about it since I held the VHS-box in my hands in my local video store in the late 90s. Even then, I was smart enough not to rent it.
