Jack Frost

This cinemasochistic Christmas horror classic is a weird blend of what is, at times, competent- even good- filmmaking; mixed with bad decision-making and some of the worst moments of acting fails you will ever expect to make it to the screen.

It tells the story of a serial killer, who gets turned into a Killer Snowman, after being exposed to an experimental chemical in a car crash- while being transported to his execution.

Now, this crude, cigar smoking, snowman sadist is on the lamb...and out to kill. And he has acquired the ability to melt and re-animate himself at will.

The Sheriff who originally busted Jack, before his transformative experience, is the only one who suspects that Jack is somehow responsible for the recent spate of murders that have been plaguing their town.

But the FBI intervenes, and seems to be covering something up...for someone. That someone being a chemical company who has designed an experimental substance that has the potential to harbour and transmigrate the soul- like what happened to Jack, when he was exposed during the crash.

Will they be able to figure out how to stop- and destroy- Jack, before he snow-rapes and kills everyone in town? I guess you'll have to watch for yourself and find out...if you want to subject yourself to that...

As was previously mentioned, both the acting and special effects are hit and miss, in this one. At times they are kind of great, but mostly they are just bad. Really bad.

It is, however, worth a watch for all the cheesy-as-hell one liners that it contains. Well, that, and the patently ridiculous storyline...which is definitely good for some laughs.

4.5 out of 10

A serial killer (Scott MacDonald) dies, comes back as a snowman, and wreaks havoc.

This is one of the stranger Christmas horror films, and has a cheesy sense of humor. The snowman costume seems like the same costume that Full Moon would later use for Gingerdead Man. Although, out of respect, I should note the production quality here is better than what Full Moon does.

I suppose today this film may hold the dubious honor of being the first role of Shannon Elizabeth (as Jill Metzner). So, if you want to see her before "American Pie", I guess this is the film for you.

You know you're in for a special movie when it starts with an adult(possibly a man) voicing a little girl that we never even see. This movie has lots of moments that don't make any sense but what do you expect from a movie about a killer snowman? The sheriff has the same floor tile in his bathroom as I do, lol.

Not to be mixed up with the family film of the same name (though that would be friggin' hilarious), this earlier "Jack Frost" is actually a goofy offbeat B-movie parody. Everything is present to give you a fantastic evening filled with pointing and laughing. The plot is insanely moronic, so moronic that it needs a buttload of deus ex machina just to get on the rails. The acting is also terrible, and I'm not sure whether the actors are doing it on purpose on not. Scott Macdonald's over-acting is clearly intentional, but all the other actors probably can't do any better than this. You know you're doing something wrong when Shannon Elizabeth (who, granted, looks totally hot in this one) is among your best performers. The greatest source of entertainment are the one-liners though. Many filmmakers believe in the age-old "quality over quantity"-idea, but Michael Cooney wants none of that and just has Jack Frost firing wisecracks with every chance he gets. Some of these are funny ("I only axed you for a cigarette!"), some fall flat (pretty much all the other ones), but it gives the Jack Frost character sort of a Freddie Krueger-like quality that is really fitting here. "Jack Frost" is an awful movie, but somehow I just can't grade it accordingly.

Don't confuse this flick with the 1998 Michael Keaton film of the same name. This particular Jack Frost movie IS NOT for children, but it sure is hilarious.

One of my favorite scenes is where Jack Frost requests a smoke from a guy, then kills the guy with an axe, and says: "Gosh. I only axed you for a smoke." That line never fails to crack me up.

If you're looking for a good B-movie to watch, this is a good choice. But remember, to use Jack Frost's own words, it ain't f**king Frosty!