Truly Madly Deeply

A nice look at what it means to lose someone, and to be the lost as well. All too often (as in the treacly "Ghost") we are treated to a fantasy version of love and loss, where you get to have your cake (looking fab in that graveside outfit) and eat it too (dead person is wonderfully available as he guides you to your next, even better for you, love). Here, we see a woman who cannot let go, who is so paralyzed with grief she cannot live the life left to her. The man she lost untimely loves her so dearly he returns, not to take up where they left off (which is all she asks), but to guide her back into life, life he can never have again. What makes this movie admirable is the deft and sensitive rendering of the act of letting go, from both the point of view of the lost and the living.

Now, I like a weepy, I'm not ashamed to admit it. I actively seek out those films that are most likely to make me cry. However, more often than not, I end up disappointed because usually this type of film is either wildly melodramatic or painfully sentimental.

That's what I was expecting from this, to tell the truth. A woman overcome with grief at the death of her boyfriend? Give me a break!... I was in floods by the end, and promptly watched it again.

This film is testament to how well us Brits can do when we put our minds to it. It's charming, funny, warm and absolutely heart-breaking. All the performances are grouped under an umbrella label 'very good', with one notable exception: that of Juliet Stevenson as Nina. She is magnificent, and is, at times unbearable to watch. I'm still absolutely astonished at her performance. This is a woman who has had her heart and soul ripped out I love this film. I'm getting a lump in my throat just thinking about it. It's wonderful! (Blub! *Sniff*)

I was given this film as a present on my 17th Birthday - a bit cynical to watch such a soppy love story, i decided to go it a go one evening..and didn't take my eyes off the screen until the end! This movie is fantastic! As a product of the late 80's myself - it is a film that makes me wish i still lived in that era!

Some of the best quotations! - that make you realise how important insignificant things are in a relationship (Watching the clouds go by on a lazy autumn morning, sitting up all night chatting etc) This film fills you with nostalgia; my fav part has to be the end..having gone through a rough break-up recently, i can empathise with the feeling of 'letting them go' and moving on.. "My feet shall want to walk to where you are sleeping - but i shall go on living" Watch this film - it'll make you think...

This is a beautiful little movie. Juliet Stevenson (as Nina) plays one of the most authentic female leads I've ever seen: She bawls full-out, complete with fluids; she looks like a man in bad lighting; she's passive aggressive and irritable and loveable and likeable and real. Likewise, Alan Rickman's character, Jamie, is peevish, like all of us, self-centered, like all of us, but beautiful and unique and again, real. Unlike the schmaltz we're fed here in the states, where dialogue consists of rehearsed speeches (think Jerry Maguire) and love seems skin-deep, this is a couple that seems not only to love each other but to genuinely like each other; a couple that has their own language, as long-term couples do (and it's not translated, which is so refreshing), a couple that can be silly with each other and irritated with each other within minutes; that can have spats that are not high drama or the beginning of the end or anything other than the end of a long day in a too-hot apartment. The ending broke my heart yet seemed like the most natural and right course of action. Truly stunning.

If I'm ever forced to compile a list of my all time favourite top five movies, it will vary from week to week – maybe even day to day – and certainly depend upon my current mood and degree of cynicism. But I'm absolutely certain that Truly Madly Deeply will always be in there. I simply love this film. (And hate the version that Hollywood made of it, Ghost.) I watched it again recently, and it was like visiting an old friend. I must have seen this film 10 times yet I seem to be able to glean something extra from it every time. To me, that is the mark of a real work of art, to be able to revisit it and find something new; to still be moved even though the work is familiar.

Truly Madly Deeply stars two of my favourite actors, Juliet Stevenson (Nina) and Alan Rickman (Jamie), and is touching and bittersweet without ever being mawkish. They were a well-matched couple, in love, and he died suddenly, leaving her utterly bereft, almost unable to comprehend what has happened. Overwhelmed by grief, she cannot get a grip, until Jamie comes back from the dead to comfort her. The performances are truly stunning, especially Stevenson. I challenge anyone not to be utterly riveted by her scene in the therapist's office, where we see her anger at Jamie, her dead lover, for dying. She draws the viewer into her misery and desolation in a way that is rarely achieved on screen.

But it's also a funny movie, touching and life affirming. We see the little, silly, personal details and games that make up a love affair; the stupid stuff that makes it real; trying to out-do each other in expression of their affection ("I love you truly", "I love you truly, madly", "I love you truly, madly, deeply", etc as they watch the clouds go by), we see Nina clinging to the remnants of the life she had with Jamie, the appalling rat infested flat, the cello. It takes Jamie's return from the dead for her to start seeing that it wasn't always perfect, and life without Jamie might be possible. Finally she starts to move on, and we know she is going to be OK. In the meantime Jamie is freezing cold (after all, he is a ghost) and turns the flat into a sauna, and his dead friends – who are all movie buffs – are watching videos in the living room in their bathrobes.

Of course the story is a bit hokey, but this is very much a performance driven movie. I watched this film again not long before I went to see Look Both Ways, a much more recent Australian movie about death and dying. Neither has much in the way of plot or action, but both are perfect examples of how even the old clichés and truisms of life can be made fresh and true by intelligent writing and the sheer veracity of the performances. They are both a tour de force in acting. Watch them both.