Fei Chow woo sheung

Just when I thought I'd seen it all. Hijinx ensue when an ancient Chinese vampire meets up with the isolated tribe of bushmen from 'The Gods Must Be Crazy.' Ha ha ha ha.... Oh this movie is painful.

(I'm attempting to write this with a straight face) We open at "An auction house in England" where Christie's (?) is auctioning off an ancient Chinese vampire. They begin the bidding with an introduction film explaining how the Chinese vampire differs from the European vampire. Let me guess, he's hungry only an hour after he feeds?

The prize goes to two Chinamen who say they need to return the vampire to their "village" in Hong Kong. "Village" in the third most densely populated city in the world? Maybe it's like Manhattan's Village?

Anyway the vampire hops around like Super Mario several feet into the air with his hands out. Get used to that, 90% of this film is done Benny Hill style.

The three step outside into Mardri Gras. I'm NOT kidding. Mardi Gras in London! They explain it's "Halloween." So the British celebrate Halloween not by tick or treating but by dressing up in beads and dancing in the streets?

Next they're attacked by three American muggers whom the vampire scares off. I would like to state at this time we're only SIX MINUTES into the movie and it's all down hill from here! (yes, it gets worse... a lot worse)

Next we see them flying in a twin engine propeller plane back to Hong Kong via Africa. Again, only SIX MINUTES into this movie!

Down bellow we see Nixau from the first two films getting into scuffles with Zulus and two Westerners clearly meant to portray Indiana Jones and Willie Scott. SERIOUSLY! Willie even keeps saying, "Diamonds?"

Above the pilot says they're going down and dumps their load of Coke bottles being shipped with the Chinese vampire. So the reenactment of the Coke bottle falling from an airplane in the first film is done to the extreme with dozens of Coke bottles falling from the sky and hitting everyone exactly on the head.

There are also cases of Coke cans. When the bushmen examine them a tribe elder throws it on the camp fire in disgust... and it explodes! So Coke is flammable? Or is he like Master Shake from 'Aqua Teen Hunger Force' where EVERYTHING thrown to the ground explodes?

The two Chinamen parachute out and must make their way across the African wilderness in search of the vampire. First they're chased by a rhino. But unlike a real rhino in the original film we get two actors in a rubber rhino suit. Think Jim Carey's rhino suit from 'Ace Ventura II.'

Fortunately they find a faster way to travel via riding on an ostrich. This is when John Williams' theme to 'E.T.' kicks in. NOT kidding! This isn't first famous film score this movie steals from.

At this time I'd like to state we are only THIRTY FIVE MINUTES into the movie! There's so much more to come.

The vampire has predictably ended up with Nixau's tribe where the children love playing with the vampire, making him jump all around the village. This is all done Benny Hill style. But instead of Slim Pickens we get Danny Elfman's theme to 'Peewee's Big Adventure.' Again, NOT kidding about these stolen themes.

Eventually the Chinese find the bushmen village, but the Zulus attack again! And to defeat the vampire they have their own undead weapon, a seven foot zombie whom roars like King Kong. Again, NOT kidding! They actually use the 'King Kong' sound FX from the 1976 remake!

The Chinese fight back by conjuring the soul of Bruce Lee and putting him into Nixau (I can't believe I just typed that) By now you should know I'm not kidding. At this point in the movie a Chinese magician conjuring the soul of Bruce Lee an putting it into Nixau the bushman isn't surprising.

Yes, Nixau fights off the Zulus like Bruce Lee, yelps and all while the 'Enter the Dragon' theme plays.

A helicopter picks up the Chinese and Nixau and his bushmen are left behind trying to use ancient Chinese magic to create their own vampire. That's the closing shot.

Well that was certainly something which was filmed.

Is it worth seeing? Well, try to imagine 'Big Trouble In Little China' meets 'The Gods Must Be Crazy' directed by Benny Hill... except not funny.

And don't forget... there's a part 4 as well!!! This time Nixau teams up with a talking chimpanzee and gets involved with rival Triads. Apply razor to wrists.

The closing credits do credit the use of the 'Enter the Dragon' theme but NOT Danny Elfman or John Williams! They shall be avenged!

The best of all "the gods must be crazy" movies. Chinese humor is excellent. (Note, I am not Chinese. I live in America) Vastly underrated. Perhaps, they did not show it in many American theaters because they were afraid that westerners might not be able to appreciate the movie.

Excellent acting.

Excellent script. The creators of this movie should make more similar movies.

I saw this movie a long time ago. But still remember it. It has lots of humor which does not require much thinking. Good clean fun. I do not remember any offensive content in the movie.

Apr 2021

The main english title for this ia Crazy Safari, but its also known as Gods Must Be Crazy 3 and Vampires Must Be Crazy.

So after the success of the 2 South African comedies "Gods Must Be Crazy 1 and 2", Hong Kong got hold of Nixau and teamed him up with Lam Ching Ying from the Mr Vampire films, this was the result...and it worked.

Some great comedy here...Nixau does Bruce Lee,..So they mixed two excellent series so it couldn't fail really, so if like the Mr Vampire films or the Gods Must Be Crazy films its a must watch.

This actually has narration by Stephen Chow and Ng Man Tat, in the style of Gods 1 and 2, but there are no subs for what they say.

Now check out the other 2 HK films with Nixau.

10 out of 10.

This is the third movie in the The Gods Must Be Crazy movie-series but with as a big difference that this movie got made by an entirely different studio and even an entire different country. Weirdly enough this is an Hong Kong movie that still of course mostly is being set in Africa.

The movie tries to blend in the two successful series by mixing the The Gods Must Be Crazy-series with "Geung si sin sang", also starring Ching-Ying Lam. The movie its main concept might perhaps sound more ridicules and lame than the overall end result really. Basically this movie has very little to do with any of the The Gods Must Be Crazy previous movies, also in terms of its style and humor. So you can't really compare this movie to the previous entries and you have to take this movie on its own and for what it is.

The movie in itself is not bad but also not great either really. Of course the movie is being quite lame really and unusual with its mixture of primitive African tribes and an ancient Chinese vampire. It just isn't a movie of the highest quality but all in all it still is amusing enough to consider this movie watchable.

Basically the only thing that connects this movie to the previous two is the presence of N!xau again, who had learned about the value of money after the second movie and therefore must had willingly agreed to appear in this movie as well, as well as 2 more Hong Kong sequels to this movie.

Nothing too great or impressive but good enough for what it is.

6/10

http://bobafett1138.blogspot.com/

This is a thoroughly bizarre kung fu action vampire slapstick exploitation movie, essentially an attempt to combine the success of two films, the excellent Chinese hit Mr. Vampire and the international hit The Gods Must Be Crazy (which for reasons unknown to me, was considered "good" and "funny" upon its release in the US). They also threw in a little Bruce Lee montage at the end, no kidding, but don't worry, they worked it in tastefully-haha! The African bushman from Gods... (yes they got the actual guy) engages in amusing slapstick with a hopping vampire. All the white people are horrible, and the Taoist magician from Mr. Vampire rides an ostrich and saves the day, basically. Somehow this was all worth sitting through, if only for the sake of it being one of the strangest films ever made.