L. A. in the late-'80s/early-'90s was a special place for music fans, with an alternative rock scene from which emerged some truly great bands. Rockula is set within this exciting world, yet somehow manages to be completely naff, its characters blind to all the cool things going on around them.
Singer Mona (Tawny Fere' Ellis) is a pop songstress who, incredibly, draws an appreciative crowd despite being a cut-rate Paula Abdul clone. Vampire Ralph (Dean Cameron) somehow makes being undead seem uncool, so it comes as little surprise that, when he decides to form a band, its utter garbage (but like Mona, he still manages to impress those who turn up to his shows). A musical with such lousy music should be virtually unwatchable, and yet Rockula is actually quite a lot of fun, the cast seemingly aware of its awfulness and just rolling with it.
Ralph takes on the rock 'n' roll persona of Rockula to attract the attention of Mona, the umpteenth reincarnation of his true love, who is always fated to die at the age of 22 by the hands of a pirate wielding a hambone. Ralph has the power to break the curse, but must pluck up the courage to woo the woman in order to do so. Mona, obviously tone-deaf judging by her own warbling, is impressed by Ralph's band (backing members including Bo Diddley and Susan Tyrell) and the pair begin a romance. However, Mona's jealous manager, Stanley (Thomas Dolby), is out to ruin things, aided by a mysterious fortune teller.
Numerous terrible musical numbers ensue, with some awful performances and diabolical comedy (I still don't understand why his reflection has a separate persona - or why a vampire has a reflection in the first place), but the breezy couldn't-give-a-monkey's attitude of the whole thing means that it's hard to hate on the film too much. It's worth a one-time watch just to see Toni 'Hey Mickey' Basil perform her solo song and dance routine (and I can't be alone in thinking that Basil with fangs is kinda hot).
5.5/10, rounded up to 6 for the black dwarf that shares a bath with Basil, the really bad rap song, and the weird bat creature that Ralph turns into. Would make a fun double bill with Voyage of the Rock Aliens.
