Don't Drink the Water

This 1994 TV movie released to video in late 2000 tells an inane tale of a Jewish American family that, while vacationing in Russia, is mistaken for a ring of spies during the height of the cold war in the 1960's. This is the story of their exploits as they are holed up in the American Embassy waiting for their chance to return to the U.S.

The story was written and directed by Woody Allen, who is one of the most accomplished auteurs in the history of film. It is clear that Allen purposely dumbed this screenplay down for TV. Instead of his trademark cerebral humor that cuts like a scalpel, he uses a machine gun approach, hitting the viewer with a fusillade of lowbrow jokes and slapstick gags. The humor ranges from insipid silliness to standard sitcom fare with occasional intellectual ironies thrown in for his devoted fans. Though most of it is infantile, the sheer volume of material (literally five to ten jokes and gags a minute) insures that something will tickle you every couple of minutes.

The cast is rich with accomplished comedic talent. Michael J. Fox plays the son of an ambassador who is a hapless diplomat in training. His frenetic and tortured style of comedy is perfect for this role. Dom DeLuise adds his wacky brand of humor as a priest who has been in hiding in the embassy for six years and is trying to learn to be an amateur magician. For him, the extra inhabitants of the embassy represent a captive audience on whom he can inflict one botched magic trick after another. Julie Kavner brings her whiny New York accent and her wonderful sense of sarcastic timing to play off Woody Allen's inimitably overwrought caricature of himself. Kavner is a refreshing change for Allen. We are used to seeing him across from flaky wimps played by Diane Keaton and Mia Farrow. The use of the bluntly badgering Kavner added significant energy to his performance. The cast is rounded out by Mayim Bialik (TV's, Blossom) who was decent, but not great as the Jewish American Princess in captivity.

Overall, this was a good comedy that was significantly below Woody Allen's standard. There are plenty of funny lines, but it is a much too farcical. I rated it a 6/10. If you enjoy Woody Allen's normal introspective and intellectual humor, this might be a disappointment.

Don't drink the water is a rarely recognized masterpiece by Woody Allen. Filled with unforgettable characters and a fabulous script, this film is a must see for any comedy loving person. In my opinion, the best characters were Mr and Mrs Hollander. Michael J. Fox also delivers with wit and charm. There is a tricky priest, a paranoid American chef with a gun, an overly oppsessive housewife who is constently waxing the floors of the diplomatic relations building,a crazy walter-hating chef who cannot make an American meal,a diplomat who got hit over the head and now believes that he is the wright brothers, and an Axel loving young woman who believes in fortune-tellers. This movie has everything.

I LOVE THIS MOVIE. The story involves visiting American smucks in the old communist Russia. A picture is snapped in the wrong spot and the KGB assumes the family are spys. They take up residence in an American embassy and need asylum. Love blossoms and tempers soar--an old fashioned screwball comedy. I know some people say it's not one of Woody's best...and it isn't. It isn't even close to the top of that list. But...I laugh my tush off with this movie. Alex Keaton and Blossom are great. Woody Allen is, well, Woody Allen. It is nothing but a popcorn movie. Flawed? Yes. It is very funny though and a great mid level Woody movie in the same vein as "Take the money and Run'--but with a plot. Watch it, enjoy it, laugh.

For those who are familiar with Allen's work, this TV adaptation of the play will be no surprise: it's funny, well-timed and far superior to the miserable Jackie Gleason version (done before Woody had the clout to insist on filming it himself). TV regulars Michael J. Fox and Mayim Bialik play to their strengths (although I would have preferred Cusack and Danes, or other Woody regulars - I can't imagine these two were his first choice), and Allen and Kavner pick up where Oedipus Wrecks lets off. Not fantastic, but what do you want? It's TV.

Evidently, Woody Allen didn't like the original film of his script, so decided to star himself for a tv remake. It's the same story, but with a completely different look and 'feel'. Instead of an embassy in the middle of nowhere, this is more realistic--lots of people work there, and it is elegantly furnished. Allen is his usual frantic self, sometimes overshadowing every other character.

Michael J. Fox seems a bit miscast as the loser son of a diplomat in charge, and there isn't enough for Julie Kavner, as Allen's wife, to do but Dom DeLuise expands on the magician/monk role. It's really more of a filmed play, as all the action takes place in the embassy (no final chase scenes, no hotel scenes). This version is sillier, quicker than the original, andI actually like them both, but this one will appeal more to Allen fans.