Cyborg Cop

I miss the 90s I really do, and I remember this film profoundly when I was a kid especially the sex scene, kidding . Now, let's get serious and cut to the chase. Cyborg cop is one of those low-budget films that were inspired by the popularity of "Terminator 2". Of course, this is not your typical "Terminator" movie, but still it has some entertainment for home video. This is also one of the first rare movies that includes hard core "Commando" like action, cyborgs and martial arts. And I think that makes this movie pretty cool. Our leading hero is Jack Ryan (typical name for all American movie hero from low budget films, you know, the usual names are John, Jack, Bill, Ray, James, Jim, Mason, Matrix you know, the cool, strong sounding names), the DEA agent. He received a message from his brother who disappeared in action somewhere in Caribbean islands and of course, he convinced (through violence) his boss to go there and investigate what happened with his brother Phillip. And over there, he finds out that there's more than some drug traffic, like more action scenes, and meeting a sexy reporter Kate, and of course a secret laboratory for cyborgs. And now, it's on you already know how this kind of movies end. Jack is played by David Bradley (best known for American Ninja sequels and American Samurai), a martial artist and actor who well, as you can see, acting his not his tougher side, but he gave us an interesting fighting scenes. But the character was interestingly written, with his "I don't give a damn" attitude, leather jackets and his waist bag, which he also has in the sequel. As a main villain, we have John Rhys Davies wait a minute He is a good actor, if not the best actor in the entire film, I never realized how some of good actors end up in a low budget, crappy films. But, John did several of them, so I think he was OK with that, he is the main, rich scientist called Kessler who created cyborg. He did pretty well in the film, but on occasions, he looked like some cliché, silly villain, with white suit and walking cane, with ridiculous accent. The leading lady Kate is played by Alonna Shaw. Ohhhh, that sexiness the lovely blonde of the early 90s love that, you remember her perhaps from Double Impact (1991), she was here just to look hot and have a sex scene with Jack, because her acting is also not that good. Jack's brother Philip is played by Todd Jensen, yet another low budget actor, I have seen him so many low budget films. And, there is a supporting villain, a cyborg named well, just cyborg, really menacing prototype who makes an interesting, mad faces, the dude looks funny and his, I mean, the "cyborg outfit", masked leg and arm, that looks like an expensive Halloween costume. Oh and I love those funny explosive, remote control airplanes and Jamaicans cheering for a good fight when Jack is taking over the bar Oh, and a fact that cyborgs were built by a German scientist now that was extremely funny and really unusual cliché.

Looking at the title I thought that it would be okay. Sadly it failed a bit and the only reason is that it looks cheaply done and the effects used, if we can say effects, are laughable. The cyborg itself just looked ridiculous. Easy to spot that it just was a rubber suit. And just look at his feet, also a rubber shoe. It was also Rufus Swart last role in the business here as a cyborg just coming from the gem Dust Devil (1992).

Coming from Raiders Of The Lost Ark (1981) John Rhys-Davies was casted in low budgets just before his second breakthrough in The Lord Of The Rings (2001). I have to say that the acting of all was mediocre but was surprised that it contained a few nudity shots, one gratuitous by slaves working in a fabric topless. Unbelievable. The other nudity came from Alonna Shaw here as Cathy. She never made it into the business, this also being her last flick before she appeared in two episodes in two series.

The only effect worth noticing is the replacement of a real arm into a cyborg arm. And here and there there are a few nasty shots like a slashing and the cyborg smashing his fist through a head.

Jack Ryan, the main lead was played by David Bradley who became notorious after his role in American Ninja. He came back for the main lead in Cyborg Cop 2 (1994) but also failed after wards and stopped in 1997. Sam Firstenberg, the director also came from the American Ninja flicks and tried to pick in on the Cyborg success and the Terminator flicks.

It do has a kind of Robocop (1987) feeling but as I told before. It has a cheap look. Worth watching for a few shots and scenes but only for the B-flick fans.

Gore 1/5 Nudity 1,5/5 Effects 2/5 Story 2/5 Comedy 0/5

I bought this on DVD for £1 after me and a friend of mine were having a season of watching really lame films, and I have to say, this is very possibly the most unintentionally funny film I have ever seen in my whole life. I don't know what the hell Sam Firstenberg was smoking when he made it, but whatever it was seems to have totally affected his ability to shout "Cut!" as there are so many scenes that left me wondering why the hell they didn't just go back and refilm them. And the editing is atrociously bad. Look carefully during the scene where David Bradley's character is assaulting the house on his motorbike. He jumps off the bike, and shoots twice at a couple of guys, one on the roof, and one on a balcony. Count them, he fires two shots. So then why, inexplicably, does a third man roll down the stairs immediately after, clearly having been shot? It was this kind of total sloppiness that made the film so enjoyable, yet baffling, as they obviously had a decent enough size budget to hire helicopters and blow the hell out of everything, yet not enough to edit the damn thing right...

Other unintentionally comic moments are: "Quincy" the Cyborg (Yes, Quincy...) trying to smash through the door in the morgue but nearly knocking himself out as only the top half of the door crumples (my favourite bit. Watch it in slo-mo...).

Quincy getting electrocuted and walking into a wall.

Quincy's hand-knife-glove-fingers.

Quincy, the most advanced robot cyborg in the world deciding the best way to kill the president during the demonstration is to dive through the windscreen headfirst and catch fire.

David Bradley doing a spinning kick and kicking no-one in the face in the fight outside the bar.

David Bradley disarming a guard, then spinning round on the spot for no reason before shooting him.

David Bradley's lame attempts to distract the police officers in the car before he snatches the gun.

David Bradley's Bumbag.

David Bradley.

Todd Jensen's "Philip" cyborg, and his wholly inappropriate cyborg voice. Coupled with a hilarious penchant for repeating words for no reason, such as, John Rhys-Davies: "this is the bank"...

Philip: "BANK"...

Put simply, if you haven't seen this movie, hunt it down. It is utterly hilarious, for all the wrong reasons. 10 out of 10.

CYBORG COP is an entertaining low-rent beat 'em up with a sci-fi twist. It's a classic piece of B-movie fare, featuring all the usual elements we've come to expect (and love) from our cult films: a muscled, posturing hero (David Bradley), a slumming British actor playing the villain (John Rhys-Davies, who should know better), locations standing in for elsewhere (here, South Africa is meant to be the Caribbean), awful effects (the robot suits are something else), plentiful action, a gratuitous sex scene (featuring DOUBLE IMPACT's pneumatic starlet, Alonna Shaw) and terrible script.

The story has hints of ROBOCOP but those expecting to see a robot dishing out justice on the streets, as the title would imply, are in for disappointment: the cyborg cop of the title is a supporting character who never gets to go out on the beat. Instead, this is a standard revenge format, with the lead character (Jack Ryan, not the Tom Clancy one) tracking the villain to his lair to rescue his kidnapped sibling. Bradley's acting is pants, but he gets to show off his martial arts skills in a series of low budgeted but highly enjoyable action scenes which involve plentiful destruction and mayhem.

The movie has a decent director in the form of Sam Firstenberg, whose REVENGE OF THE NINJA is still my favourite ninja movie; CYBORG COP doesn't reach those highs, but it is a lot of fun. The combination of cheesy effects, cheesier one-liners, shoehorned-in nudity and diabolical acting (Rhys-Davies repeatedly slips into a broad Yorkshire accent for some reason) make this a heady brew that cult fans will find difficult to turn down!

I was not expecting much, I knew it would be cheesy and that it was a movie not to be taken seriously. However, I am not entirely sure what to make of Cyborg Cop. The acting I didn't think was too bad, I like John Rhys Davies and he is good value as the villain. Rufus Swart is also fun, and while over-the-top at times David Bradley's performance is hardly bland either. The story is derivative and holds few surprises but I never found it dull really, and the soundtrack is decent. However, Alonna Shaw is rather annoying, and the editing especially in the action sequences, of which I have seen worse but generally unexciting, is choppy. The script is uneven to me, Kessel has some fun lines but a lot of it verges on unintentionally cheesy, the ending is stupid to say the least and the characters are rather stock with not much done with the titular character to make him interesting. In conclusion, I don't consider it a great movie but I can think of much worse, if anything I'm very neutral on Cyborg Cop. 5/10 Bethany Cox