Men Don't Tell

In this heroic effort to show another side of domestic violence, Judith Light, who plays the main character, found herself learning about a situation she'd never dreamed was possible. Yet it is true--there are violent women, and just as the character played by Peter Strauss finds, there is no help for male victims. Light and Strauss give honest portrayals of people caught in an ugly situation.

Although it was fairly accurate for the time regarding police involvement and other details,laws have changed since this movie was made, rendering many details obsolete. Still, it is the *only* movie of its kind, daring to recognize a hidden, albeit politically incorrect reality.

I've worked with battered men for over 10 years and know that this is a significant problem, but there is an even worse one. Violent mothers account for 55% of fatal child abuse, even when custody and time spent with the children are taken into consideration, according to the US Justice Dept. study, "Murder in Families." Fathers account for 8%, stepmothers/girlfriends for 9%, and stepfathers/boyfriends for 10%. We are working on building a shelter for fathers and children in Kansas City, but it is a slow process, but one is needed. Studies on domestic violence against women show that 39% of the victims are men, but you only find that out by looking at the charts that come with the studies. The summaries don't mention this, preferring to only address violence against women.

The first time I saw the movie was during the breakup of my marriage. I only got to see part of it as I could feel what he was going through as I did the same... I was in love and went through hell for 7 years because of the love I had for my wife.

I had 2 children that ended up in her care after I was thrown out and 10 years later they now live with me and understand... As they've been thrown out too because of her drinking, at the ages of 17 and 14.

I hope I can still make it up to them for not being able to prove it all in the 10 year custody battle.

I know... I didn't want to 'tell' either...

I was ashamed to let anyone know the control she had over me.

I was wondering if anyone knew where i could purchase this video. I've looked around and still cant find a store that carries it. I live in New York. I've checked blockbuster, family video, F.Y.E in and around geneva and rochester NY and have had no luck. I have also checked Amazon.com and found nothing. I eventually found it on this site which is the 1993 movie with Peter Strauss. But there was no way to purchase it from this site that I'm aware of. This is a movie that shows the other side of spousal abuse that is apparently rarely reported. I would greatly appreciate a response in my efforts to locate this film. It is a major interest of mine to investigate this topic further.

Good film from begining to end, it shows that men can be victims of abuse too. There needs to be more movies addressing this subject and more conversations about abuse against men. The movie does a good job of showing how and why men don't tell about the abuse, because they are afraid of not being believe and being seen as weak.