Anthony's Desire

If you want to see a film that has the absolute worst dialogue that you have ever heard in your life then this is the film for you. I'm not kidding. The dialogue in this film is the equivalent of inner ear torture. Sticking knitting needles in there would be more fun.

The plot (for what it's worth) is about a traveller in a beachside hotel...and that's it. Director Tom Boka pads it all out excessively with long periods of silence and intercuts with footage of him making the film (which actually looks staged). He thinks he is making an art film because he is letting it take its own shape. The shape it takes is that of garbage.

This is no more than an extremely soft-core T&A flick that is unwatchable in all areas. It's not even entertaining by accident. This film is plain bad, BAD, BAD!!!

A personal favorite mainly because of the sensual Michaela Stoicov. See, the movie is boring, labeled as an art movie but the truth is that it's a pseudo artsy movie that tries too hard to get the viewers' attention with a "complex" plot but only accomplishes to bore and get on the nerves of the audience.

I sat through this because of Ms. Stoicov and her sex scenes. The woman has a body to desire and facial expressions to fantasize about her. If you like soft core sex and women like her, then this movie could be a decent way to waste 90 minutes of your life.

Still, watch it only if it airs on cable. Do not waste your money on this.

I never knew that B-Movies had their own "B-Movies". Anthony's Desire is a slow, boring, artsy film about some hotel/brothel. Although the film is meant to be American, it has too much of a Euro taste (Hungarian), and the cast is B-Level in the looks department. The storyline: A man looking to make a movie is having a block, and a woman tells him this story about a man and a women she knew in her earlier days.

Top billed Michaela Stoicov and Doug DeMarco play the couple while Gwen Somers plays the woman who tells the director about these people and appears with them. DeMarco is an unimpressive looking man, while Stoicov looks like Marilyn Lightstone from "In Praise Of Older Women" (which isn't a compliment). Somers looks like your typical exotic dancer, and it seems that everyone's voice is dubbed; some of it may have been from another project. Tom Boka plays the mullet-clad director. Ashlie Rhey is one of the silent nude dancers, who perform the most boring shows you'll ever see. Sadly, a poor effort, but I'm sure there's an audience for this one somewhere.

This film is deliberate in both its pacing and its technique. The first time I saw this movie I must admit, it almost put me to sleep, but the second and third times I started to "get it". The film began to reveal a host of subtle flavors that I had not been primed to understand until sitting through this Goddardian soft-porn the first time. The director, Tom Boka plays a role in the film as a frustrated documentary filmmaker. All in all, this is not a film for the average person. This is a film for the connoisseur of underground eurotica.

A self-conscious, "Carnival Of Souls" kind of film. Lots of us wanted to do something like this when we were young, but fortunately we couldn't get the money.