Bread

Set in Liverpool in the 198o's at the time of high unemployment, Thatcherism and the miner strikes, through to the 1990's. The Boswell household was run by matriarch Nelly, a strict Roman Catholic family and Nelly always found salvation in the Church. Every mealtime she passed round a china hen in which they all put money. Sometimes we got to see Freddy, Nellie's ex-husband, who lives in a caravan with his girlfriend Lilo Lil, a big chested Irish woman with flame red hair, short skirts and a little fur jacket and high heel shoes and an equal fiery temperament to match.

Every episode had some crisis which the whole family would resolve around the dinner table, and a prayer or two would be said.

Money matters would be solved by going to the local DSS office, where they were met by the fiery, ice hearted DSS lady. The family claimed every single penny they were entitled and more if they could. And they worked on the side too to bring in extra cash

"Bread" follows the lives of a close-knit family in 1980s Liverpool. We see their trials and tribulations, their daily battle with an outside world of crime, poverty, unemployment and immorality. Using their wits, the Boswells beat this world at its own game, exploiting every loophole in the welfare system to cheat the bureaucrats of the DHSS.

Nellie Boswell and her five grownup children (Joey, Jack, Adrian, Aveline and Billy) are fiercely loyal to one another. When one has a problem everyone else comes to the rescue, traveling in a convoy of cars, ranging from Joey's black Jaguar to Billy's clapped out old mini. You always see them walk closely together at the same pace, staring straight ahead. The charming, leather-clad Joey was always the first to speak, usually beginning with the word: "Greetings!" Not every episode had a happy ending, however.

When I first saw this programme I was still in primary school. It used to be shown on the ABC every Monday night at 8.00 PM. I liked it when it first started. 1986-1988 was the heyday of the show. But after a while it didn't seem so fresh. The show dragged on into the early nineties, after the fall of the Berlin Wall and the collapse of the Soviet Union. The mobile phones were still huge, though. They changed the actors who played Joey and Aveline, although I found the original Aveline's accent a bit annoying. The show seemed to have lost its sparkle.

When the last episode finished in 1991 we saw the camera draw away from the Boswell house in Kelsall Street (which looked identical to the surrounding streets), getting an aerial view of Liverpool at large, finishing with a shot of that old cathedral. And there it finally closed.

A sitcom from my childhood that my mother absolutely loved, as did most of my schoolfriends, but as a twelve-year-old fan of Monty Python and Fawlty Towers, I couldn't for the life of me understand what all the fuss was about. The show revolved around a supposedly penniless Liverpudlian family, all of whom had their own annoying and oft-repeated catchphrases, and to this day I can't believe how much the audience used to roar with laughter at "She is a tart!" and "All the colours of the rainbow, son". Written by Carla Lane, famous for being paid large sums of money for making nobody laugh (see also BUTTERFLIES and THE LIVER BIRDS), and featuring audience-grabbing but embarrassing cameos from the likes of Paul and Linda McCartney whilst shamelessly playing on every chirpy Scouser stereotype in the book - hey, we're all natural comedians, poets and lovable rogues, don't you know! - this series was a nightmare from start to finish and dragged on far too long. Carla Lane somewhat unrealistically blamed the show's declining popularity on "disloyal ratbag fans" rather than her own tissue-thin scripts and the atrocious, stilted performances from all concerned.

In its time, "Bread" was a bit of a cult show. Now it's being shown again on UK Gold (a UK 'classics' channel) I wonder what the source of its popularity was. The mother is domineering and has a nasty tongue in her head, her family are obsessed with 'the family' to the exclusion of normal social interaction with anyone else, the humour (such as it is) is laboured at best, and the dialogue is stilted and poorly-delivered.

This certainly hsn't stood the test of time.

It's so easy to survive poverty and economic depression. All you need is the wit and the nerve to outsmart Government bureaucracy. Then you can have a decent home with plenty of food on the table, you can even run a classic Jaguar!

At a time when Margaret Thatcher and her thugs were destroying UK manufacturing industry and throwing whole communities on the scrap heap of unemployment, 'Bread' came along to show working class people were lovable scallywags who could rake in pots of money from the Department of Social Security by running rings around the rules.

I can only assume no-one associated with this condescending garbage has ever been faced with actually trying to prove they are "genuinely seeking work" (which required a file of rejection letters as thick as a telephone directory) or making their remaining £5 (or $8) last until they are allowed more social security.

The alternative was to get a job as a 'security guard' being paid £1.95 (or $3.40) an hour. Oh, and you had to provide your own dog.

If you want to know what working class life was like in Liverpool in the 80's, watch 'Boys from the Blackstuff', not this rubbish.